Need Your Opinions Please! (Ring Given to Me After Grandma Passed Away)

If it were me, I wouldn't change it. If it were my grandchild who inherited the ring from me, I'd be pleased whether or not she changed the stones especially if she actually wore it.

I, personally, would not change anything that was given to me in this situation.

It's ironic you mention a ring because even though I've been divorced and single for 15 years, I got lots of comments today because I wore a ring from my great aunt to work today. It was the first engagement ring her husband had given her. I sometimes wear it because I feel it keeps her close to me. She's in her late 80's and has a beautiful set of wedding rings that she wears even though her husband has long since passed away and she wants me to have her wedding rings when she passes away.

I wouldn't think of changing them, not even the size. That's just my opinion. She has tiny fingers like me and I will wear them from time to time even though I'm not married at this time and I will think of her and my uncle fondly when I do.

The ring I wore today is 70 years old. I simply can't imagine altering it. It means so much to me that she gave me something so precious to her and it might just be me, but I wouldn't defile it in any way.

Jewelry is jewelry and people change stones and things all the time. They change stones into rings or earrings or necklaces or vice versa. It's a personal thing.

Like I said, for me, personally, I wouldn't dare change it.

Best wishes.

I like Grandma T's suggestion.

The ring is yours now, I would think you are free to do as you wish. Personally, I would change the stone.

Who does that one stone represent, do you know? If you do, maybe you could remove that stone and place it into a new ring and give it to that family member that it represents, and replace the stone in grandma's ring with your daughters birthstone.

I would change the stone. If I left a ring behind and one of my granddaughters received it, I would hope she would change it and still treasure it because it had been mine.

I think I would change it if it means that you would wear the ring. I don't understand having nice jewelry and not wearing it and/or keeping it locked in a safe some place. (Not that you're saying you'd do that, but a lot of people seem to). Your grandmother gave it to you because it was special to her and I don't think she would protest about changing one stone to make it even more sentimental.

I have a couple of thoughts.

1. Find out who the birthstones were for originally. That may change my mind.
2. I think it's super cool that 4 out of 5 match YOUR family, and there are 5 of you. What is Grandma's birthstone!?!? Could you replace the 5th stone with Grandma's birthstone if your other daughter's bstone is already on your wedding ring?
3. Can you add Grandma's birthstone & replace the 5th stone for your daughter?

I think changing it is completely acceptable, but I'd want to add Grandma someway. :) Best of luck to you!!

I'm curious, like Grandma T. Who were the birthstones for originally?
That might affect your decision about changing the ring.
I certainly wouldn't change it just to put it in a drawer, though. If you would wear it regularly, then I would consider changing it... but I don't know.

I have the wedding ring/rings that my great grandmother wore. I say ring/rings because originally it was one band. She split it in half and gave the other half to my grandmother to wear. She and my granddad divorced, her mom had passed, and so she had both pieces of the original ring, which she then gave to her daughter (my dad's sister). She never had children. I am my dad's only daughter. When I was planning my wedding, she sent the ring/rings to me. I wore them on my other hand during the ceremony (something old), but I keep them in a box.
I considered at one time having them put back together again, if it's possible. But then I decided that I didn't want to. I like the heritage that comes with the ring/rings and I wouldn't start wearing it or anything, it would still sit in a box. It is just a simple plain gold band. But, back in those days, not everyone had even that, probably why she cut it to share with my grandmother intially... so I find the whole thing neat.

i'd change it. i think it's a beautiful way to reflect the ongoing march of history and ancestry.
my GIL gave my SIL a spectacular diamond ring. the family was in a huge uproar when SIL had it reset into her wedding/engagement ring. i don't get it. it's still grandma hazel's stone and it's in a setting that SIL loves and gets to wear every day.
make it particularly yours while honoring her. what could be wrong with that?
khairete
S.

I think your grandma would want to include your third child in her precious ring.

I would change it if it would encourage you to wear it and enjoy it more. I have my husband's grandmother's diamond in my engagement ring (my setting) and I still feel as if it's special because it was her diamond. I would think you'd feel the same way about the ring if you changed out a stone.

You can go either way. I have known of women who inherited Grandma's ring and put the beautiful stone into a more pleasing setting, or vice versa.

Others decide they will keep it as Grandma's ring, per se, and appreciate it just the way it is.

So if you decide you want the ring to reflect your own family, I imagine Grandma might be pleased as punch for you make the changes. Of course, I don't know your grandma.

If you change the stone, the ring may well look odd. If it's an old ring with old stones, you need to realize that jewelers used different techniques to cut stones in years past, and you likely will not be able to get a stone of the type you want that will have the size, cut and color to go well with the other, older stones you leave in the ring. In other words -- you would have a ring with four stones of different types but matched sizes and shapes and general clarity and a fifth, new stone that will always stand out a bit due to its being a newer, shinier or differently cut stone. It will not look great and will always jump out at you visually.

You probably could find a very good jeweler who could source older stones and older cuts, etc., but it will cost you a lot. You may have to have a stone custom-cut to fit and that's expensive. (My brother has a jewelry company so that's where I'm coming from here -- He says they get lots of requests for things like replacing just one stone on an antique ring and it's much harder than people realize.)

I would leave it alone for the sentimental reasons others have already mentioned. I also would get it appraised by a reputable appraiser and insured if need be.

I would not change it.
You will pass it down to your daughter. Should she pluck out the stones that meant something to you and replace them with her own? I would learn the story of each stone and tell it to your kids. Then, when you pass it down to your daughter, she can tell her kids about great aunt so and so. The ring is meant to keep memories of gramma alive. Since it has these birthstones, it will also keep these aunts and uncles memories alive.

I'd leave it as it is because it's a rememberance of your grandma vs. your immediate family. However, it'd be perfectly acceptable to alter it if you wish.

So I'm assuming the stones were originally chosen for other people--her children or grandchildren most likely--and coincidentally they "almost" match your family, right?

Personally, I wouldn't change the ring--I'd want it exactly as she had it and wore it.

Changing it would be like her ring giving you a head start on your own ring....and really, think about it, would you want a "mother's ring" with yours & husbands stones in it, or just your daughters' stones?

I'd chalk it up to an "almost amazing" coincidence, and keep grandma's ring as is. My opinion. :)

I personally would not change it. However, it sounds like this is special to you. So if I was in your shoes, and it meant that much to me, than I would change it. I hope my answer makes sense lol