Need Help with My 2 Year Old Son

Updated on April 07, 2008
D.K. asks from Laguna Niguel, CA
6 answers

Hi everyone, hope you are all doing well... I NEED HELP PLEASE!!! My son Josiah just turned 2 in January. He's a good loving boy, however I have had problems with his sleep patterns since he was a new born. At this point in his stage of maturity. I cannot get him to go to sleep at a normal time. He wont go to sleep until 11pm or 12am.. He normally gets up between 9:30 and 10:15 am. Takes a nap between 2 to 2:30 pm and can sleep up to 3 hours. Because of his sleeping pattern, I cut his nap in half to 1 1/2 to 2 hours and have tried putting him down at night between 10 and 10:30 hoping that would make a difference.. IT HASN'T.. He still won't go to bed until 11 pm or 12 am. On top of everything else I can't get him off his bottle. I have made him take sippy cups during the day and have allowed him to have a bottle at night. Now he just cry's and cry's until I give him a bottle at night. Sometimes 2 or 3... I feel awful cause I know he should be off the bottle but I can't stand to see him get so upset. On top of all that lol he shares a room with his 6 year old brother. So I think that is why I get even more frustrated because I don't want him to wake up his brother.. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I can do to fix my son's sleeping patterns and wean him off his bottle? I would be forever grateful to you all.. Thank you and God Bless all of You...

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K.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

D.,
I have twin newborns so I know all about babies waking eachother up...I read on the johnson & johnson website that sometimes sleep patterns can be adjusted by making a more routine bedtime schedule ~ try feeding him dinnner and then giving him a bath right before bedtime w/ their "sleeptime" bubble bath and then reading him a book before tucking him into bed...it takes 21 days to form a habbit so as hard as it might be stick to the routine for at least 21 days and then hopefully you will start to see a change... It has worked like a charm for my twins, they are in bed no later then 8:30 pm everynight and wake up about 4:45 am...Good Luck!
-K.

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K.J.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi D.,

My advice comes first hand. I have raised 6 children and they would do similar things. The solution I have is to wake your son at 7am. I know he will be grumpy. BUT there will be light at the end of the tunnel. You wake him at 7, or even 6am, then he'll be READY for a nap around 12 or 1pm, then around 7:30pm, start a bath. He needs a routine of bath, book, prayers(if you do that) and bed. That's it. Final. Your decision, not his. You are the mother, he will follow you. No, it might not happen in one day/night, might even take a week or more, but believe me, he will fall into a routine. HE WILL!!!!

About the bottle, again, your decision, not his. YOU need to stop giving it to him. Just that plain and simple. If he gets his bottle at 7:30, he shouldn't wake the sibling. In fact, the opposite, the sibling will probably be going to bed later than the baby.

Good luck!!!

I live in Irvine, newly transplanted from Pennsylvania (in October)

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B.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi D.,

God Bless you too. I agree with Jennifer N. that you need to start waking your younger son up earlier. While all kids are different (some are day, some are night owls), you can help them get on your schedule. I found this book helpful: "On Becoming Babywise," by Gary Ezzo. While I don't subscribe to everything in the book, the part that may help you (and it helped me) is setting guidelines and lovingly and firmly enforcing them. Something else you can try while you are working on adjusting your little one's sleep schedule (after checking with your doctor) is Melatonin. GNC has a natural 1 MG cherry flavored chewable tablet. My kids get over-tired and start bouncing off the walls on occassion, and that's when we break out the Melatonin. All it does is help them relax enough to get to sleep. I use this occassionally, not every night. As far as the bottle goes, maybe you can make it a goal for him to decide not to have it any more. Let him pick out a toy or favorite activity. Make a chart (make it reasonable - like maybe five days) and every day he goes without a bottle, he gets a star or sticker, and after five days without, he gets rewarded with the toy or activity. It gives him power and responsibility without making it seem like a punishment that you are taking something away. Please keep us posted, and good luck.

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J.N.

answers from Los Angeles on

what is in the bottle? when i transitioned my 2 year old off the bottle, i gave him a sippy cup in his bed (one with the soft tip) full of water. it worked (and still does) beautifully. he could get it whenever he needed it. sometimes, he drinks it all and wants it refilled... very rarely. typically, he just takes a few sips when he wakes in the middle of the night and goes back to sleep. perhaps if you give your son some preparation "in 3 more days it will be time to say bye bye to your bottles" take him to the store to buy a few soft tip sippy cups in the color of his choice. use those solely for bed time and solely with water. also... follow through. in 3 more days... get rid of the bottles. this will show him that you are following through and will also prevent you from giving in in the middle of the night when you just want to sleep! before i transitioned my son... he did the same thing. it was a habit. not that he needed the bottle. with ample preparation, it may be a smooth transition. or it may not. but be consistent. it may take a few nights... but in the long run... a few nights is much better than continuing in the pattern. hang in there. this too shall pass!

as far as the bed time... lots to consider. what time is your 6 year old going to bed? is the tv on right before? is active play happening before? is he having any sugar or caffeine before? what does your bed time ritual consist of? how much time does he get with dad before bed? how much attention is he getting upon each waking episode? does he stay in his bed? ask yourself these questions. he is getting something out of this. what is it and how can you fulfill this need outside of this habit. PRAY. for wisdom. for patience. for sleep.

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M.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

He definately needs to be off that bottle. Ever watch Supernanny? You will need to go through a few (or many) depending on how you stand your ground, rough nights before it gets better. At the age of 2 if you explain that he will not be using the bottle anymore and maybe show him by throwing them in the trash, it might be a good step. As for the sleeping pattern this is my suggestion. To me a two year old waking up at 10:00am is a godsend for most people, but that is why he is staying up so late. Try waking up your son at 7am, make his nap time after lunch around noon and get him to bed around 8ish. The first few days will be hard because he will be tired and cranky. Let him have the 3 hour nap during the day for the first few days because he will need the rest. Just prepare yourself and be ready to just give him TLC. After a while he will adjust. As for the bottle I would get the new sleeping times down before taking the bottle. Doing both is too much.

Good luck

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S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I know the sleep pattern's difficult, but I think that trying to change the nap time isn't going to help. I noticed the improvement in sleep patterns once my children were in school and on a regular schedule. Then, they just simply fell asleep earlier.

It also helps to have the bedtime routine.

Since you're in SoCal, perhaps it would be good to start the morning at the park nice and early after you drop your 5YO off at school on a regular basis. It gives the 2YO something to look forward to in the morning, get's him going early and hopefully napping earlier too.

Good luck!

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