Need Help to Bring Holiday Cheer

Updated on December 23, 2012
J.M. asks from Fox River Grove, IL
7 answers

My best friend in the world is in desperate need of some holiday cheer. She was doing a surrogacy and lost the baby at 11 weeks along last week and her husband's bonus did not come through so instead of joy she has stress and sadness for the baby's parents. I know we are all feeling a degree of sadness because of the tragedy in CT but I would like to try to bring her some holiday cheer. She doesn't feel like it is Christmas and this is usually her favorite time of the year. I know there is nothing I can do to take the sorrow away but I want to do something to lift her spirits and make it feel like Christmas to her. Any suggestions? :/

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V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

Christmas Eve Midnight service.

I would skip any that start in the 7:00 pm range... these are usually focused more on the kids and often have a kids' play or skit re-enacting a version of the nativity. But if you go to an 11pm or later service (the "midnight" service) it is usually a serene candlelit service that becomes quite joyous at the very end. Very peaceful. I've never left a midnight service feeling rushed or sad or anything but joyous and peaceful.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.E.

answers from Jacksonville on

See if there is somewhere you could go and volunteer together for Christmas Eve or Christmas...Maybe it could help her get back that spirit while she's helping others...Always brightens my days when I help others...

3 moms found this helpful
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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Really, just be there.
Be there to listen or just to provide companionship.
IME, some Christmases are just like that.
Sad is sadder, happy is happier.
You really can't "make" sad happy.
Just be a friend. :)

3 moms found this helpful
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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

Just let her know you love her and be silent until she is ready. It most likely won't be Christmas for her until next year.

2 moms found this helpful

P.W.

answers from Dallas on

Invite her over for a nice dinner, Christmas music and decor. Talk about what you ARE grateful for.

2 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

We will be attending a Carol Service at church tonight and a Christmas Eve service tomorrow night. These are my favourite services of the Christmas season. Even if you aren't regular church goers you can appreciate the music and the peace, love, hope and joy present.

1 mom found this helpful

R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Be a friend. You can't replace her sorrow and stress. Let her know you're there if she needs you, that's the best thing you can do. Take her some baked goodies, give her a hug, but know her happiness has to come from within. I lost both my parents this year, my Mom just last month, and am reeling, many people I know lost loved ones as well. We don't all grieve in the same way or on the same timetable, but we'll get through.

1 mom found this helpful
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