Need Advice - Columbus,OH

If you do decide to call it quits - you could look for a room mate. My DD is buying a house and used craiglist.org to find a roommate to share the house with. Maybe you could locate a grad student from UD or something. DD is charging a flat rate that would incude utilites.

i can't say much for advice but i can relate, it sucks to feel trapped in a relationship because you can't afford thigns on your own, but it also isn't a good reason to stay in an abusuve situatuin, what does that teach your daughter? first things first figure out what you need to do to be able to cover the bills on your own, you don't even really need to tell him why at this point, jsut go do it once you feel you will be ok without him sit him down and tell him he has 30 days to stop or get out, it's more than fair, and will give him ample time to find a new living situation himself. it will also show your daughter taht you value yourself and think you should be treated with respect and that you can handle things without a man around, all very good things for a young girl to learn. whatever you decide understand that youa re not alone and there are always ways, i don't knwo your current financial situation but you could always apply for food stamps and medical through the county as well as child care assistance to help with costs, tehre are also organizations out there that will help wiht bills should you fall behind and get shut off notices, as well as HEAP for heating bills in the winter, most phone companies offer a discount service if you are on any form of public assistance and there are always things you can live without. good luck in whatever you decide. take care.

I am was in your shoes, or am. I have a 5 year old and moved to Avon Lake with my at the time boyfriend. We were then engaged for 9 months when he decided to just up and leave us. We were together for just under 3 years, and so my daughter was 2 when he came into her life and is now going to 5. Its hard on her because he was the closest thing to a dad, and its sad that he left but looking back it's for the best. I too bought a house but it's in my name so I haven't come across anything too legal to deal with him. We did share bank accounts but we got those seperated soon after he decided to call it all off. It's hard on a day to day basis, and I think I was able to get through it becuase of my daughter I wanted to be strong. But it was hard at the same time. Hang in there, you will survive this I may not know you but I seem like a great mom and know what's best.

You gotta let go sometimes and this is one situation where you have to !! You know that though

I would tell him to get out.that you can make it on your own. Some men thinks that us woman cant make it on our own, it may be rough but we can.be careful the name calling might just be the beginning of other things to come. Also you dont want your child to think that name calling is ok. Do you? Big deal on how long you have been with him i would not put up with it,stand your grounds.GOOD LUCK LET ALL OF US KNOW HOW THINGS ARE GOING BE SAFE

try telling him you need to sit down and talk and tell him you dont appreciate the name calling its very hurtfull and not good for your daughter to hear and if he cant try to quit suggest marriage counceling well if that doesnt work i would have to call it quits but try every effort first i have been there been married for almost 18 years and hubby and i seperated for a year and a half because of issues like this one that wasnt the only reason but it was one of them we have since worked things out but your have to be able to communicate or nothing will work best of luck to you and i will keep you and your family in my prayers

wow i am in a similar situation for ever since my bf and i moved in together it has been nonstop fighting and you add family problems or financial situations it gets worse. oh and of course we don't get any right to be horrible when we have pms. because to a man it's just in our heads. i don't know what to do either i want to move out but can't afford it on my own either. want to be roomies? j/k !

How recent is "recent"? If it's been a few days, maybe he's stressed about something- ask him. I am in NO WAY saying it's right, but I guess what I'm trying to get at is that a few bad days don't constitute a big, messy breakup.

If it's been weeks, months, etc. then it's time to consider moving on. If he's not respecting your feelings, the situation will get worse and it will put your daughter in a very bad place.

Do not allow him to treat you this way. Be very firm when you tell him your feelings. I'm not sure what your personality is, but don't laugh about it, joke about it or otherwise let him think it's not that big of a problem. Really talk to him and don't just say something in passing. He'll never pay attention.

If you continue to stay in a relationship like this, your daughter will learn two things: 1) From him- It's ok to treat people poorly and 2) From you- It's ok to let someone treat you this way.

I understand your financial struggles. It stinks! However, you and your child must take priority over anything else. Don't worry about the length of time you've been together. That's hard, I know, but you will be much better in the long run. Your daughter will thank you for removing her from a bad situation.

Good luck with whatever you choose and I hope it works out for the best for everyone.

I know it's difficult, not only contemplating leaving a long-term relationship, but with a child, it's even harder. If you have suggested counsling and he won't do it, you need to think of you and your daughter, especially your daughter. Would you want a man to treat her that way? More than likely not, and that is what will happen if you stay and he doesn't change. I know it's rough being a single mom. I have been one for a while now and I work and go to school trying to make a better life for us because I can't depend on her dad at all. Trust me, you can do it! If you decide to split up, he will have to pay child support, which will help with your expenses. Someone else mentioned a roomate, which is a great idea. My best advice would be to start the ball in motion. Start looking at your expenses and get a handle on things, including looking into either moving, getting a second job, or finding a roomate. I know it won't be easy, but YOU CAN DO IT. You and your daughter deserve much better and you will be so much better off in the long run, esp. your little girl!