Nap Problems Part Two

http://www.babycenter.com/0_the-ferber-method-demystified...

Here is a link to an excellent book that will solve ALL your children's sleep problems, ever! I used it w/both of my boys and have referred it to many others with equally excellent results. This doctor is an authority on sleep problems/issues and has an answer for everyting you would ever imagine. Even better, he explains WHY you (or your child) is having their particular problem.

I am sorry that things aren't working out with your son right now. I can hear your frustration.

My only advice is to stick with it. It won't happen overnight. Since this is just Day 1 with pushing his naptime back, keep consistent with it for another week.

I didn't read the original post, so I am not sure how old your son is. But when my son was about 2 years old, he went from 2 naps to 1 nap. It took a few weeks for both of us to adjust to it. The first week was slowly adjusting the time from 1130am to 1pm (I think I moved it back about 30 minutes each day or so). The second week was him adjusting to the new time and not getting out of bed, crying/screaming, etc. Each time I would put him in his room, read a book or pet his back for a few minutes (like 5 minutes max), tuck him in, and leave the room. I have been doing this since he was about 4 months old so me leaving the room isn't much of an issue with him. But him getting out of bed during those transition times was an issue. I would just keep putting him back in his bed and leave the room with little to no reaction/talking from me. After about a week he stayed in there and slept peacefully.

Like I said before, it won't happen over night. But with more time and consistency on your part, it should work out.

So I just looked up your original post...If your son is as rambunctious and energetic as mine is, I would also suggest giving him more activities to keep his mind and body occupied during the morning before his nap. I know if I kept my son indoors all morning, he wouldn't nap at all at that age. But if I did a short activity with him in the morning that kept his brain occupied (like painting outside or sidewalk chalk or chasing bubbles) then took him for a long walk around the block (where he actually walked next to me) or to the park for about an hour before naptime, he went down with no problems.

I also had a newborn baby at the time so I knew he wasn't getting enough outside activity being home with me all day. So we enrolled him in preschool 2 mornings a week. Trust me, as soon as he got home from preschool at 12noon, he was READY for a nap. Most of the time he would fall asleep during the 10 minute ride home from school. Then the other three days I would make sure to take both the kids out to the park or other play area to let him burn off his energy. Then we went home for lunch and then a short nap on those days.

I would keep at it for a few weeks and see how it goes.

On the flip side, after trying it for a few weeks, if you have no success, it could be that he is just done with naps. My neighbors daughters both stopped taking naps around 2.5 years old. My son is now 3.5 and will still take a 2-3 hour nap midday if I let him. The only reason I don't is because when he does nap, he doesn't go to sleep at night until after 10pm and then he is messed up the following day.

Sorry for writing a book. Hope that your little adjusts soon and that you both find the right combination of a sleep schedule that works for you.

I didn't read all the advice you got from your other request, but how about just trying one good piece of advice for about a week. He may not be ready for "quiet time" yet, but it sounds like the later nap helped. My son has gone through rough patches with his nap starting around when he turned 2, but by remaining consistent about the time, he gradually has continued napping (he's 3 yrs, 3mths now). We periodically have a difficult time for a couple of weeks and then it improves again. Others have a point about you just spending the time with him, but realistically, that's probably not reasonable. You need to have some sort of break in your day when you're busy caring for an infant and a 2 year old! I know, I've been there. Is it possible he wants to be up since the baby is up with you? My son went through that as one of his rough patches with naps. After a couple of weeks, I think he figured out that I wasn't doing anything exciting with the babies (twins) other than feeding them and trying to put them to sleep. Then, he didn't mind as much that they may have been up while he slept. Eventually, the twins got on the same nap schedule as my oldest and that has helped a lot. However, at 4 months old, I guess you're still a long ways from that. If you don't manage to get a break during the day if he doesn't nap and that's what is really bothering you, is it possible to arrange for someone to watch the kids periodically so that you can get things done and have some time to take care of yourself? It's a tough age that your kids are at right now, hang in there.

He wants his mama. Hold him. He is still a baby himself at two. Why aren't you listening to him? You are creating chaos in your household by not addressing his needs. Let his quiet time be you holding him and snuggling him for a while after his nap. Don't make him stay in his room alone. Staying in his room with him does not defeat the purpose as long as everyone is quiet. Unless your purpose is not having to deal with your two year old for a few hours.

Nothing get my kids to sleep like a nice long walk to the park. My suggestion is to take your son to the park this morning. Try to be out of the house for an hour. Don't just push him in the stroller, if you're close enough let him walk the entire way or part of the way. Then once you are at home, no TV for at least an hour before nap time. By getting out of the house, you are satisfying his need to be with you for a long period of time, without the distractions of household chores, etc. and he is getting the physical activity he needs to develop his gross motor skills.

Happy Napping!
N.

Hi N., Isn't parenting fun? first of all how ols is your son?As a parent you need to wrap your mind around, that it isn't always about what a child wants, it's about what the parent thinks is best, I have learned by reading a lot of the mama sources that kids today have a lot more power over their parents than they did when my kids were little. If your son is in his room screaming hey, if he at least 2 or older, hey you want to scream in your room, knock yourself out, when you are done screaming you may come out. You were right about staying in his room would have defeated the purpose. It's hard to give advice about things because has scared parents out of discipling their kids, and some kids are running a muck, discipline is part of love, if we love our children then we want them to be productive when they are older, but every good thing taked training and discipline, parents are afraid of discipline. Is your son at the age where you feel he still needs a nap durng the day? Weather or not he is having the Quiet Time. is not up to him, when the screaming does not get him what he wants eventually it should stop. Trying to communicate with him while he is screaming will not work, he won't hear you, but if you make it clear that you don't care if he screams ibn his room. him sreaming will defeat the purpose he's going after. Stand firm and loving, There is a Book out, and It is called Parenting is not for Cowards, ( people afraid to discipline) it's a good book, I read it when my now 19 year old daughter was 4, you may be thinking it's out dated, but it has a lot of good stuff in there. J.

My son does the same thing! I've been reading The No Cry Sleep Solution and one of the things it says about napping is that babies go through their first sleep cycle and wake up and sometimes don't know how to put themselves back to sleep. It recommends waiting by the door at about the time the baby usually wakes up and soothing them back to sleep as soon as they start stirring. Hopefully after a doing this for a while, baby will learn to sooth themself to sleep. Usually after I do this with my son, he'll sleep for another hour or so. It makes him a much happier boy. Sleeps better at night too!

Hi N.,

I'm not sure how old your son is, but there are times in their development where they just need to feel reassured that Mom will be there for them. Thus, they want to be held, put down, and immediately held again. Just be there for him, they grow up so fast it's worth it to spend your time with him now. He doesn't want to play alone in his room...he wants the social interaction with Mom. Wouldn't you?

V.

My daughter had sleep problems at night - not naps. But, what worked for us was to designate a CD as ni-night music. We chose the Curious George soundtrack by Jack Johnson. Each night when we put her down the first time we would flip on the CD (even on the rare occasion that we laid her down already asleep). Whenever she woke up in the night, we would turn on the CD before going to her. Then we would tuck her back in as say "its still time for sleeping. Listen to your ni-night music." It worked like a charm after only about 4 nights. I hope you find something that works for you and your little one!