If it were me, I would have let this be my husband's call. You don't know how far ahead of the game you are to have a husband who actually *gets it*. He doesn't want to be held in the thrall of his sister, and this is his family, so I would have let him choose what he wanted to do. Me, personally, I'm not one to let the fear of someone having a hissy fit make me decide to do something I don't want to do. If you feel like this was an inconvenience, then tell her that next time, she should ask a few days in advance, so that you can make sure to have enough food for everyone.
This would have been a different situation entirely if she'd called and asked if this would work for you for her to invite others. Many considerate adults know to do this and have some awareness in this regard. Another thing to consider: do you want this to happen in coming years? Because if you don't address it now, she's likely to do it again. It sounds like your husband wants to nip it in the bud. And just out of curiousity, why would it be *you* that was a "being a big you know what"? Isn't that what she's doing, by choosing not to be considerate? And her husband choosing not to come over unless the football game was on? Wow. Either he can be a grown-up about it, or eat at home. These people sound like a lot of work...