** I just read your update:
Wow. Your Husband is really digging in his heals. So sorry.
He seems to be acting like a little overgrown Toddler about it all... but meanwhile, reality of a baby is still there.. and he will have to adjust. It won't go away. And the more he 'resents' you or 'blames' you... the worse it will get. He needs to come to terms with the pregnancy. Isn't there some other guy in his life, a good influence, that can talk to him??? Maybe he needs to commiserate with another guy about it all.... and pregnancy....
Men... it can take time for them to feel the 'nesting' instinct and to feel as a woman does, when pregnant. They have their own concerns about life/babies/family too. Its nerve wracking and a major life adjustment... which he is probably in a state of shock! But hopefully, he will adjust... and transition to the concept of him being a "Dad".... AND still, a Husband. And that life is not 'over'... but just changing.
Being pregnant is a major "rite of passage' in any adult. It takes getting used to the thought of ACTUALLY having a baby.
It is a like a caterpillar changing into a Butterfly.... and he will do that.
It is a major "adult" milestone... to becoming pregnant and becoming a parent. It is "becoming"... that entity and person. It is not automatic.... and it continually.... is learned and adapted and changes and we, learn from it too... as parents... becoming different, improving, flexing our feelings and brains and creativity... to BECOME, our best... for baby, for family, as a Dad.... and it is also, trial and error.... with the road leading to, hopefully.... joy... and being the best Dad AND Husband/spouse, we can be.... amidst ALL the juggling that a parent does....
we have a 'learning curve" about it too.... from trying to conceive, to becoming pregnant, to becoming a parent to our baby who is birthed... and grows up, as a part of our lives....
He can take parenting classes too, or talk to other Dads/friends, who are hopefully, GOOD positive role models of what a "Dad" is... and who have a "MATURE" outlook on it, and is real... maybe, he will gain confidence then... about having a baby... and that life does not 'end' with a Baby... it GROWS and becomes.... whole.
I heard the musician Sting talk recently about being a Dad to like 6 children, and being a "Dad"... and he said, his FAMILY and kids... is what life is about and what makes him happy... NOT celebrity-hood or being 'cool' or independent. It is his life... and how he makes it... and he values, utmost, his kids. He still has a life, a career, his interests... but he is PRIMARILY a Dad.
Hearing him talk about it, was very revealing and inspiring.
Maybe, your Husband, can visit his website.... I am sure he has one. Maybe he will get inspired... about parenthood, that way.
all the best,
Susan