D.M.
My middle is not OCD but she is a worrier and parent pleaser. When she was that age she also required a very strict routine and would ask every night what -EXACTLY- we are doing tomarrow and would require minute by minute acount.
The first time I did not give her a good night kiss she was 5 and I had worked night shift. She sleep walked to my room and continued until I tucked her in and kissed her good night.
Some options for her are;
=very clear rules. They can be broad like "respect others, treat them nicely". Have these written down with the punishment for it spelled out too. Later if she does something not on the list she does not get disiplined for it the first time but she can help you add it to the list and come up with appropriate disipline for it.
=find things that make her happy. Maybe humming a tune or rubbing a river rock. Keep playing with all the things that make her happy until you find something she can do anywhere. a river rock on a necklace, for example, can be worn all the time and she could play with it.
Understanding herself will be the most dificult part of all this. The biggest problem my daughter has now is she doesn't understand her feelings or what caused them. I wish I had worked more on this when she was little.
Be thankful you will probably not have alot of disipline problems! As far as her needing compliments, don't hold them back. She probably is not able to believe in herself by herself and requires some sort of validation. Maybee goal completion will help?