ok i have a 4 and a half month old baby girl named Aaliyah (Ally). Everytime my mother-in-law holds Ally she screams at the top of her lungs and cries until me or my boyfriend gets her. My mom has watched her several times as well as my mother-in-law. Ally never does that with anyone else. She doesn't do it when my mom or dad holds her, when ally's granny holds her, when ally's papa holds her, or pretty much when anyone else holds her. She ONLY does that when her nana (my mother-in-law) holds her. Any suggestions as to why she does this?? She doesn't wear glasses, her hair looks no different from my moms, she does wear perfume but so do i. I don't know if its because when i was pregnant we had our problems and she always made me upset or cry and babies can sense that so i don't know if it has something to do with that or i don't want to say this but could she have maybe hurt her not necessarily on purpose or anything but hurt her or something because as soon as we hand ally to her she literally screams n cries until she hands ally back to me or my boyfriend. My m..i.l tries to feed her when she screams and cries but she won't stop crying and screaming until i get her from my m.i.l. My m.i.l isn't nervous or anything when she holds her cuz she has 7 kids. being nervous has nothing to do with it..
My son reacted the same way with my father until he was about 1yr old. He only would act like that with my Dad, everyone else just fine. It was just a phase. He is now 21 months and runs to sit on grampa's lap when he comes over. Don't worry, she will grow out of it.
Don't read more into this than there is. Ally doesn't "remember" your past issues. There's "something" she doesn't like. No rhyme or reason. Logic doesn't always apply to kids. You'll probably all laugh about this someday.
My daughter responded the same way to my husband's brother until she was about a year old. No matter how he tried getting her to come to him, she would hide behind one of us or on the side. Even if he brought her a treat or gift, she would scream if he tried to hold her. We never could figure out what it was. My husband has a cousin that she would always reach for and would get upset when he left. Never could figure that out either since we only saw him once a month, if that.
One of my nieces cried every time my mom held her when she was a baby. My mom is no saint, but she never hurt a baby either. I do not think that the baby in any way Senses any past issues you may have had with your MIL.
Babies can be fickle...it could be something as simple as the fabric softner she uses. Baby will outgrow it, I am sure that due to her reaction your MIL probably does get a little tense before she holds her. Keep encouraging her to hold her, baby will adjust.
My niece was the same way with me (my fiance's sis kid-me and her never fought, I never made her cry or anything like that so it has nothing to do with in the womb). I spent a week at their house and she loved me! We played together and I even put her to bed. A week later When I went to go visit she screamed and hollared. She was like this for a good 3-4 months with me. Now she cuddles and plays with me as if she never had screamed before. Never did figugre that one out but Im glad she loves me again :)
Maybe your MIL is nervous and your baby can sense that too.
Babies sense tension. If you are tense when your MIL is around, your baby will sense it. If you are anticipating the reaction she has, you are stressing. The one thing to remember though is at 4 months, you don't force her to stay with someone. You take her back and soothe her so she knows you are there to protect her. At that age, you don't teach lessons and you don't leave her in a situation where she is frustrated. She will get to a point where she will be fine with your MIL, but right now she is learning you are always there when she needs you and bonding. After about 7 months of age, you can try letting your MIL figure it out, but not now.
is your mil stressed or frustrated when trying to hold her since she knows the baby will cry? your baby might sense the tension, or stress with your mil and that may be why she continues to do it. maybe have her hold her while feeding her a bottle and rocking her since it is something comforting to the baby and see if that would help get her used to her nana.
Does she have glasses, and no one else does? Or she wears a particular perfume? Or her hair is longer/shorter/a different color than the other people in her life? Could be something as simple as that.'
My baby hated when his grandma wore her glasses at that age. When she took them off, he was fine with her.
