Seriously? She is petrified to get in it. She says it is too big and it's scary. He has an SUV. Both myself and our babysitter have a sedan, and she gets into our cars no problem.
At first I thought it was because we took a long car trip in my husband's car and thought possibly she just didn't want to get in it. But now she won't get into my nieces car either (she has a mini-van) - she says it is too big. I don't get it.
I tried putting fairy dust in the car and told her it made it a special and magic car, but that didn't work.
My husband sat her down and talked to her and she still says nope - too scary.
My husband and I are constantly have to swap cars.
It is becoming a nuisance.
Any advice?
Stop asking her why and tell her that you are sorry she doesn't like the car, but she has no choice and put her in. You are the adult, she is the child. You make the decisions.
If she said she was scared of the house and that it was too big, would you move? NO! To me, this is the same thing.
She's 3. If you keep catering to her random fears, they will only get worse and more prolific.
Why is she making the decisions? Pick her up and put her in the car. Maybe make sure she has some special toys she can only play with in that car, but she should not be dictating what car you drive.
She's three. Put her little butt in whichever car you need to take at the time, and go.
She doesn't get a choice. Pick her up and fasten her into the car seat.
Make sure it isn't too hot, or that a buckle isn't burning her or anything, though.
If you are against just putting her in there and making her ride in the car maybe you could get her a new stuffed animal or something like that, that only stays in that car. That way when she gets in it she has something to look forward to. or if she really likes ponies or unicorns get her something like that to stay in his car.
What Missy said. Don't feed the fear.
The other posters are right. Think of it less as forcing her and more as a cognitive behavioral therapy technique.
First get her shoes and whatnot on to save yourself a bit of grief. As you approach, tell her it is time to go and that you're taking Daddy's car today. If she fusses, tell her she does not get to decide. Pick her up and put he in the car. Get her into the carseat. It might take both of you. Ignore the freak out. Repeat the process until she gets over it.
This works for people who are afraid of elevators and similar. Being made to endure their very real feelings of anxiety/fear is the only way they can learn to conquer the not-real danger
She is the child, you are the parent. Pick her up and put her in. She has the control right now. That needs to change. If you don't make her get in, then obviously there is something to be afraid of. She gets in, non negotiable.
"Becky, you HAVE to ride in the car you have to ride in, just like we do. That's the way big people do it. When the ride is done, you will need to tell Daddy what a wonderful driver he is."
Then follow through, even though she protests. There could be a bit of power-gaming in this.
That said, three-year-olds don't have their imaginative life and their real life sorted out yet. It's amazing what goes on in their little minds. This is the age when they sometimes wonder if they can go down that little bitty bathtub drain - or if something can come up out of it! (Don't mention this out loud.) When you don't have to go anywhere, maybe you can make up a story with your daughter about a big, FRIENDLY car.
