My 3-Year Old as the Ringbearer in Family Wedding!

I would not tell him anything in advance about his "duties", and at the last possible minute, send him down the aisle. This way, there is no time to get scared or think about it too much.

good luck!

Hi, J.. I think the key is to plan to leave the ceremony (or have a sitter to take care of this) if your son begins to melt down or just needs a breather. My son was also a ringbearer (he was as bit younger). We had no expectations of his sitting through the wedding and basically were ready to leave (we had a sitter for this purpose, since it was my sister in-law's wedding) as soon as he completed his task. It worked out fine and our guy was tired but not ultimately disruptive, since his role and presence in the wedding were very brief. Your cousin knows that he/she is asking a 3 year old boy to take on this role, so you shouldn't feel like you need to make your son behave like a prince. Good luck!
A.

He will probably cooperate for the beginning of the ceremony, but depending on how long the whole things lasts, I wouldn't plan on him sitting still the whole time. Try to sit nearby, and be ready to walk out with him when he's getting restless or needs a break, before he gets upset if he seems like he's going to.
The reception will probably be fun for him, but if he starts to look over stimulated, a few minutes away from the action and noise has usually helped in our family.
Good luck and have fun!

Hi J.,
Easy question for me to answer as my son (who will be three in september) was in a wedding last month, ring bearer.
The wedding was in CA, and we are from nh. The three hour time change did make a difference in schedule (my son does still take naps normally). We got there on a thurs. and the wedding was on saturday. he had two days to figure out times, sleep, etc.
he did very well adjusting very quickly.
the wedding was at 430 and i was sooooooooooo very worried he would be tired and out of control. we drove around a few hours to get him to try and go to sleep. no such luck!
since we had practiced the day before what his duties were, i felt a little better knowing that he knew what to do.
the wedding (him specifically) went perfect! he could not have done better, and i was so proud of him.
if you have any more questions, dont hesitate to email me. good luck!

I just got married on June 8th :) and my 3yo was my ring bearer:) he was awespme MY BIL aka Bestman played with his hair through the ceremony... he stayed rigth where he needed to be and behaved great... thing is my son LOVES to have his hair played with ... i say relax and if worst comes to worwst you can take him for a wlak or two during the ceremony...

Don't stress. Just make sure he naps. Don't really talk about it too much before hand because the pressure could get to him. I wouldn't even mention it at all as you get close to the event. Just act like everything is normal. Then when it is time to walk down the aisle just have him practice once at the rehearsal, again no big deal. No big thing. It is the pressure that usually gets to them. Then on the big day make sure he naps. If he walks down the aisle great, if he walks with someone else, fine, if he walks and meets his mom at the end or someone else, that is great too. If he starts to have a meltdown, quickly have someone or yourself remove him from the scene. The bride and groom should be understanding. Sometimes kids perform and other times it can be a disaster. You'll probably see from his mood if he is eager or not to go down the aisle. Good luck and have fun and don't sweat it if he doesn't make it down that long aisle. It's mostly for pictures anyway!! ;)

bribery, toys and snacks.. and a good understanding from the bride and groom he may not perform as expected.. Have someone tell him there's a new toy in the pew when he walks down the aisle.. ask if you can sit up front so they can usher him right to you.. let him eat and play with a quiet toy during the ceremony and if he gets antsy, then leave. It will be a bummer foryou if he does act up, but you don't want to upset the bride and groom either. Do you best and if you have to cutout early, then do it.. they will understand. good luck!

Hi J.,
I agree with the other advice you've received. Don't discuss his participation in the wedding too much prior. Mention it once or twice so he isn't caught off guard and that's it, don't make a big deal like he's a star or all eyes will be on him or anything.

On the day of, if he freaks out and doesn't want to do it, I wouldn't try to talk him into it. Try to get the bride and groom on the same page as you on that determination. It's not cute to see a weeping child come down the aisle, nor to hear the screaming-crying coming from the church vestibule prior to the start followed by a sniffling, red-faced child. It's sad! Also it will probably just make the bride anxious. So in that regard everyone should have a plan B and be prepared to go with it.

Have fun at the wedding!

HI There,
My son was the ringbearer at my brother's wedding when he was two years old. If possible, have someone close to him stay back with him at the "entrance/aisle?". Then, you stand at the top of the aisle (obviously as discreetly as possible so you don't distract from the wedding party)so he sees you and walks towards you. The other thing we did was let him carry one of his favorite toys down the aisle (lucky for us it happened to be Alfie, from Thomas the Train and fit nicely in his hand). He went a little fast to get to me, but really did great overall. Have fun with it...you'll enjoy it!