Hello all. As you know, Obama is our new president. I don't want to talk politics, but my mother in-law is driving me nuts!
She is very republician and raciest I might add. Anyways, I am an independent and I voted for whoever I thought could do the job best.
The thing is...she keeps sending me these "forward" e-mails bashing Obama. They are raciest, rude, and just out right aweful. She is a Christian woman, lives in East Texas, and very active in church. How could someone who says she has good values be entertained by those kinds of e-mails? Needless to say, it has offended me.
In the past, I have never had any problems with my mother in-law. She is wonderful and we get along great, but this is really bothering me. I don't want to recieve anymore e-mails like that and I don't want her talking that way about our new president. How do I confront her about it without being rude? I'm afraid of her getting offended and that's the last thing I want to do.
TIA!
Simple. delete them without opening. My MIL sends forwards all day long. Not regarding politics, but the kind that say,"send this to 10 people and you will receive good news in 30 min.",yada,yada,yada.
I just delete them.
Are you sure we did not married into the same family??? Sounds very similar to my situation, except I did vote Repulican and my mother in law does not know how to send emails, ha! While my inlaws and I both share very similar political views and both voted for McCain, I still do not agree with everything my mom-in-law says or believes. The way we have worked through this is just to be honest and upfront. If she already knows you find her emails offensive and continues to send them, just delete upon receiving them...don't even open. Now, if you've never had a honest, serious discussion with her letting her know your thoughts, maybe it's time for that. My in-laws have often said things to me that I felt were racist and I told them straight up that I did not agree with what they said, and there was nothing they could say that would change my mind. Now my concern is how to shield my child from such racial comments. That scares me more than anything.
You mention that her email forwards bother you but otherwise, you get along great. Sounds like this is something that is just in email and not necessarily sentiments she would express in public. I agree with the other posters - just delete them. These strong opinions for one candidate or the other will die down eventually. I have an aunt who is very devout in her religious beliefs & practices. After I got married, I joined a different denomination so that my husband and I could attend the same church without one of us feeling like an outsider. Ever since then, she's been sending me religious emails to try to make me feel guilty. Finally, it got to be so bad that I blocked her email address. Now they all just go to my junk mail.
Maybe you can email your MIL back and just say something like I know the person that you supported was not elected, but at this point neither you nor I can change the outcome of the race. All we can do is pray that the newly elected President Obama will do the job that the "majority" of the country elected him to do and that he will have our best interest at heart. Also, that maybe it was in God's plan that Obama become president and that everything done in his name will prosper. Don't continue to feed off what your MIL is emailing you, for it will drain you of all your energy.
JMO
Leave it alone. You can just erase them if they bother you.
Hi N.,
I have to agree with the "just delete them and don't even read them thing". I really think this will blow over after a few more days. And, it probably isn't worth it to create a possible not good situation between you and your MIL.
You have to pick your battles and this is probably one that will take care of itself with time. That's the great thing about e-mails- you don't have to open them.
R. B.
I agree with Jen. I am getting a lot of emails and notes that I would prefer not to receive also; not from my in-laws, but from people I usually respect and care a great deal about. I too, am Independent, but I voted McCain so this is on both sides. The best thing to do is not address the contents of the emails at all, but rather just ask politely to be removed from her distribution list. I have had to do that in the past with people who send those annoying jokes and "good luck" emails all day long. Argh! Technology can make the best of us seem pretty annoying :)
YOu can go one of several routes depending on the type of person you are and what sort of relationship you want (or don't want) with your mil.
You can reply to the emails with links, citations, etc disproving or supporting whatever is in the email. A lot of these emails (and they exist on both sides I might add) are simply to incite and anger certain demographics in order to raise $$ imo. You might end up frustrated if she still sticks to her (possibly misinformed) guns.
You can also send her a calmly worded email stating something like, "I understand you disagree; however, we need to work together, be a family, not let things get between us, etc.". You need to agree to disagree from here on out and hope that this doesn't come between you both. As part of that healing, kindly tell her to please not send you any more of these emails. Family matters more than politics. If family values are as important to her as you suggest, this should be emphasized. Chances are, you two have a lot more in common than this one issue and perhaps you should re-emphasize this as well.
You can also just delete them which is probably the easiest route. It may not resolve anything, but then, that may not be necessary in your case.
Don't you just love election years?? Democracy is the foundation of our government. This means that some years, our guy (or gal) doesn't win and you just have to live with it as best as you can. We're also very fortunate in that we live in a country where we can voice our dissent; however, this shouldn't come at the cost of our families (i think at least). We should all be able to act as emotionally mature grown ups, but we all know how that sometimes goes. ;)
That is a tough situation. I would definately talk to your husband about it first, but do not let him talk to your MIL for you. You need to talk to her personally. I had the same situation with my father sending me emails before the election that leaned completly one direction and I leaned the other. I just asked him nicely one day to please respect my feelings and beliefs and not include me when he forwards those type of emails on. He stopped forwarding me the emails and didn't have any problems with it. Good luck.
I would definitely talk it over with your husband first, but you might state it as simply as "I would prefer if you took me off your distribution list for forwarded emails." It is so sticky when it is your in-law's. ugh.
