I hope you can learn what maybe not to do.
Sounds like my mom and I. We were/are so alike in many ways. I was a mouthy sassy little thing, and she would ground me, take things away from me, yell, scream...you name it! I quickly learned that I would never get ungrounded, I would never keep anything and my favorite of her sayings "I bought for you so it's mine"...I learned to tune her out when she would go on a rampage. As I got older and into high school I found that the less time I spent at home the better off our relationship was.
I participated in so many after school activities (sports, clubs, etc) I found that is all she would let me do and it kept me away from her. To this day we are not "friends", she is my mom and I love her but we will never have what she had with my grandma. And frankly it's till very hard to talk to her, very hard to show her pure raw emotion.
With my daughter she is mix of both my husband and I, we have much better relationship, we are close, we have fun, we laugh, we cry...but she knows I'm the mom and I don't have to yell, scream, fight with her too much. Once in while we butt heads but it's rare.
i.e. the other day she lied about having socks on with her new boots. January and 30 degrees she should have had them on. She lied said she did (I knew she was lying) so I said let me see. She said "I'll be right back"...well I took her boots away from her and made her wear tennis shoes for the rest of the day.
I try to make the punishment fit the crime, maybe then she'll think about it harder. My mom...I would have been grounded for a week and had to listen to her scream and yell for an hour.
I don't do rewards for doing what you're supposed to do. However once in a while a huge reward is given for good behavior and showing responsibility.
I say take your breakfast time this weekend and really sit down and talk with her and listen to her...she might have some ideas on how to improve your relationship. Also, really think about how you would want to be treated were you in her shoes.