Help. Ive been crying for a few days because my 3rd, and youngest child, my only daughter, is starting preschool on Tuesday. She is the baby of the family and im happy that she is excited about going, but I have mixed emotions. How did you deal with this? Im not having anymore children so this is the last one going off to school. Im so sad in one way but happy for her and for the 4 hours a week I will have free. Yet I keep crying when I think about the big picture. My husband doesn't really get it either. Ive always been a SAHM and im just down about her growing up. HELP! How did you handle this. My daughter has no idea im sad because im always excited for her and talking about all the good things she'll be doing in school. I just feel like I might loose it when I bring her there the first time, or even before or after that. Did you feel like this?
Just dropped off my daughter. It went well. Almost all the moms or dads were emotional when leaving, not in front of the kids. DD was thrilled and that made me happy too of course. With 3 kids and a husband, I have tons of stuff to do at home and that was not the issue I was having, its just hard to see the "baby" is not a baby anymore. For the mom who suggested to see a doctor, I thought that was very odd. I don't pop pills because im emotional for a few days, I hope she doesn't either. Emotions are normal and need to be dealt with, not suppressed. And as I stated, my daughter had no clue about any melancholy I felt, because im only positive with my kids about things like this. I don't project guilt or anything else on them. Im not a head case. Im aware this is a normal part of life and I am very happy for them. So thank you to all the moms with the (sane) advice. Im good and about to enjoy a few free hours for the first time in many many years.
Oh goodness, no. When the 5th starts preschool (and will at 18 months) I'll do a happy dance!
I need more time to keep the house in order! Cook, etc.
I didn't feel like that, I was so happy to have a little time to myself.
However, I really think you need to put this in perspective. You have fifteen more years with her, and she's only gone for a few hours. Get caught up on your chores or relax during that time.
I don't mean to minimize your emotions, but coming from the perspective of someone who is now an empty-nester, you are wasting precious and wonderful time with your child being sad about a few hours absence, when you should be really enjoying and having fun with your child while she's at home, not mourning.
You still have many years with your child. Smile.
I never, ever felt melancholy over this wonderful milestone.
I applauded my sons' entries into academic life...as did they.
of course it's sad when your littlest heads out, but it does sound as if you are a bit over the top about it. you do realize that your kids pick up on this degree of drama from mama, right? if you can't dial it back for yourself, do try to do so for your child. and if you can't, it's time to visit mr. doctor.
preschool isn't nearly as important as the current social paradigm insists. most kids do just fine and even thrive with that extra time with their parents. but if you're having this much anxiety about separation, it's probably a good thing for you as well as your little one.
i hope you are able to come to grips with this, mama. there are many milestones ahead, and you don't want your youngest to feel guilty each time she crosses one.
khairete
S.
My suggestion is to find something for yourself. Take up a hobby, take a class (many community colleges offer continuing education or audit only options) or volunteer or just take some time to do anything you don't do with kids around.
I did cry the first day I dropped off my DD (my only child) ....but I saved it for the parking lot. You'll be OK.
I soooooo know what you mean! I have one baby who is four and he just started preschool on the 28th. I cried all the way home! It's only been a few days and I miss him like crazy, but I know that it takes a village, and they can offer him things I can't. It gets easier after the first day, but I recommend staying out of the house for the first day. Having it be empty and quiet sucks. Just go out, maybe get a coffee, do some shopping, and it'll be over in no time.
Crying over preschool? Girl, you need a hobby.
I hear ya Mama! Having our babies grow up is hard. I just try and remind myself that every age is special and has its perks.
If it's only 4 hours---That would not be enough time for me to get everything done. I wouldn't be sad over 4 hrs. I would be sad it was a 4 or 5 day a week program for 4 or 5 hrs a day.
Enjoy your 4 hrs free. I think that you will get used to the 4 hrs free--in no time.
I cried at drop-off on the first day.
My single friend just dropped her only daughter off at college yesterday.
She was really upset because her house is not going to be the same. It's just my friend in her house now. That is upsetting.
It is so hard to have realizations that our children are growing up.
But what has always kept me going was seeing how much our daughter LOVED learning and exploring.
I was in awe of her ability to grasp and understand subtle things, to make up her own decisions and then to come up with her own ideas.
I loved that she could make friends, she had empathy for those that friendship did not come naturally and that other children wanted to be her friend.
I loved That the adults in her life appreciated her sense of humor and were also in awe of her natural love of learning and wanted to be a part of her life. Many times teachers said our daughter was usually the first child to get the subtle humor or the most gentle signs of emotions. I loved this!
She needed to be around a variety of people and situations to continue to thrive. Being home with us, was just never going to be enough for this child.
It was so hard, but her life was not all about what I needed, it was what did she need to be able to reach her potential.
These are all things that to this day, I have to keep in mind, or I will miss her so much, I would not be able to get out of bed in the morning and she is now 23!
She went far away for college and she has never looked back. I knew the moment we visited that college and that town that she had found her own place. It makes up for all of my worry and missing her.
It's normal to have mixed emotions. Just keep telling yourself that =) You will be just fine and she will thrive~
