Lunch Withholding

I would call CPS. As a child care provider, are you not legally a mandated reporter - meaning if you suspect neglect, are you not legally bound to report it? I think withholding food falls into this category.

What the hell.... Who does that, you were bad, so you cant eat lunch at school???
I would be watching this family a little closer now.

No you cannot. If you do, you could get fired. (In fact, ANY teacher who does this SHOULD get fired.)

Something bad is going on in this house and you need to call CPS. As a teacher, the law says you have to report this.

I promise you that these parents need to learn that they cannot punish their child this way. Just think about the PAIN this child will go through, not being allowed to eat, if you get squeamish about making the call.

Dawn

I would have called Child Protection. Withholding food is a form of neglect.

Are you kidding me?

Those parents sound unfit.

Glad you served the child.

Can you give more specific information? Are you speaking of a school situation? Day Care? Is the parent wanting this done for punishment or is he/she concerned about a food allergy?

Added after reading your additional information:

Thank you for the additional info.
Even prisoners get food. Children should never be starved as punishment. Food (nutrition) is a basic human need, especially for a growing child. To excuse someone from the table early in a meal or to deny dessert is an entirely different matter. For a parent to instruct a school or caregiver to not feed a child as punishment raises large red flags. I'm not quick to alarm, but I think it might be time to call Child Protective Services and let them know that there is a child who may be in danger.

If you are a care provider for this child then NO unless there is a medical reason and a doctor's note.
In my state licensing requires that food be offered to every child. If you are licensed you could loose your license for it, if you aren't licensed you could be charged with neglect. Just imagine that kid telling someone that you withhold food as a punishment... even if asked to do so by the parent, it would come back to you.
If you are a mandatory reporter (licensed caregiver) this may be one of the instances that you may be required to report as suspected neglect, especially if you have reason to believe that this is not an isolated incident of food being withheld from this child.

Food withholding is absolutely unacceptable as a form of discipline. Even though it may seem no big deal to skip one meal, it can escalate quickly and in my state we have had several cases of kids dead or severely ill last year because they were starved by their parents as punishment!

And just to add: withholding food is different from offering food that a child chooses not to eat. Withholding food means that you are actively preventing a child from eating, even if they are hungry.

It sounds like you're saying the parents want to punish the child by withholding lunch.

While missing a meal isn't going to cause permanent damage, I would think a planned punishment would border on neglect. If it's for a health reason, I would request a doctor's note.

This doesn't really sound like a good idea.

What a way to create an unhealthy relationship with food :/. If it's a daycare type situation, I would say (as already suggested), "We can't do that without a Dr's note."

I could see if they asked you to withhold the cookie at lunch as part of a punishment, but you were right. You as a school cannot refuse a child food.
The parents were wrong in asking you to do this.

The ONLY time this is acceptable is if the child is allergic to an item being offered and that is documented, or if the child is fasting for a medical test, in which case the child should be kept home.

You did the right thing.

It kind of boggles my mind. I mean there are millions of things you can do to correct, discipline or redirect a child without withholding food. Withholding nourishment isn't even a LAST option.

Furthermore, things that happen at home should be handled at home. You are not there to carry out their punishments. A child should be able to come to your place with a clean slate and a fresh start.

Good for you.

I would not--without a doctor's note. Is this a young child? Why would they punish a young child by withholding food? Seems cruel! Maybe they should just keep him/her home for the day.

Withholding food -- why? Is this being done as punishment and they want you to enforce their punishment at day care (if that's what this is)? Is that the issue? Or as someone else noted, does the child have allergies they're figuring out so they want his or her diet "cleaned" of certain foods for a time?

We need to know a lot more. Were you asked to do this as a one-time thing? For more than one day?

Unless they are doing it because of a food allergy or something like that, if it's being done as punishment -- I would be sure that withholding food would be considered abusive. If you believe they are withholding food at home, as punishment, consider whether you should call Child Protective Services and report them. But first find out what is really going on here.

I know the only time I ever threaten to withhold food is when my kids are extremely ill-behaved at the dinner table. And I only do this knowing that when they truly are hungry they eat, and quickly! It's definitely not a common punishment. A child should be learning to trust that a parent will always love them and provide for their basic needs. Most parents would take away tv, toys, park trips, video games, playdates etc... Using food as a punishment sounds borderline abusive to me. I wouldn't agree to that without a definitive medical reason and a doctors note. And really, unless there is a food allergy or stomach virus what reason is there to restrict a child's diet? None I can think of!

No.

Please call Child Protective Services about what you were asked to do, who knows what is happening in the home? :(

nope i dont care who the parent is i will not with hold a lunch from a child. that is not an aceptable form of punishment for anyone.

Need more info about the actual circumstance surrounding this situation.

wow, what a$$holey parents!
khairete
S.

Huh? What are you talking about?

I mean if I call my kids school and say stop selling her lunch she doesn't eat it then yes they can do that. I have never done it though it is tempting since she is on Adderall so she doesn't eat the lunch. She only buys it because everyone else is. Huge waste of money but it seems to make her happy.

Why is the parent withholding food? Is it just that the kid doesn't want to eat what was given to him or he ate a bunch of junk food and now after lunch is over he wants lunch? That is different than just saying you cant eat Most schools give cheese sandwhiches when a kid forgets a lunch.

I don't if witholding lunch is illegal, but it should be.

What is the situation? Without more info, there's really not enough to go on here. Is this a punishment? Or is this something where the child has a special need or is getting a medical procedure and needs to fast? Like someone else said, most schools still provide a sandwich if a kid doesn't have lunch. On the surface, if it's just a consequence for something else, I would say no. If you are on a federal food program, don't have guidelines? Even if it's "legal" is it right? The kid will be tired and hungry. Would YOU like to forgo your lunch?

When my sks said they didn't like school lunch, we started packing lunch. I'd rather spend the money on a bagged lunch they'll eat some of than a hot lunch they'll throw away.

No, you should not with-hold lunch. That's not right, but why did the parents make that request? You should check that out before you call CPS. People like to call CPS at the bat of an eye without finding out why!

uh hell no! call cps NOW if tey are telling you not to feed him at school no telling what they do at home

My son's school withheld his lunch one day because he wasn't writing an apology letter fast enough. They finally let him have it when the school day was over and the food was cold. I didn't necessarily agree with it as a punishment, but I was there watching the situation and he was too upset to eat anyway.

I could see if it was the parents wanting to send their own child to bed without dinner as an old-fashioned punishment, or an eat-what-we-cooked-or-nothing situation. But asking a school or day care not to offer lunch doesn't sound right to me.