Loss of One Twin

I am so sorry for your loss and so happy for your joy. Man, Life sure throws us bundles sometimes. I just wanted to tell you that for whatever it is worth to you, I'm praying for you.

My twins are 6 years old now but my pregnancy was really difficult and I thought about what would happen if I lost one or both of them a lot. I can't imagine how hard this must be for you. I would definately look into therapy- talking through your emotions with someone who is trained to help you evaluate them objectively would be so helpful for you. They would also be able to help you consider your options for medication. Having a baby really messes with your body and your emotions, having twins takes even more out of your body and then losing one is really more than one person should have to face. I am so sorry for your loss. Don't try to pretend that you are not feeling what your feeling- but I would definately recommend talking to a therapist or your ob-gyn to get a referral to talk to someone. Best wishes- M.

Of course you are joyful, and mourning at the same time for the baby you can't hold and protect. It is normal to have depression symptoms when you are on such and emotional and physical roller coaster. You also still worry about the twin who came home. Make sure when she is old enough that she knows she was a twin, and that you loved her sister immensely too.

The Tristesse Center at 1709 S. Baltimore in Tulsa has a group running most of the time that could help you with this. Others have been through at least some of what you are experiencing. Their insights and how they survived can be the best therapy in the world. There are private counselors also if that would be more comfortable. The phone is ###-###-####.

I hope you realize the joy is also OK to have. No guilt allowed! I will be praying for you and your family M..

If you need NICU follow up care and don't have it available, please contact me directly-that was my job for 6 years.

So sorry for your loss. Its only natural to feel the way your feeling, you need to stay strong for the baby girl you have now, ( I know easier said than done) but she needs you now so its important to stay strong for her. Its hard to find the words to say when someone has a loss loved one.

Sounds like your daughter is doing great and striving and getting better.

M.,

I was pregant with twins too. I lost one of them at 11 weeks. It was really hard on me and I didnt know what to do or think. A good friend then told me, Even tho you had twins, God has still blessed you with the lil one you have. It was very hard to hear at first, but I now understand. I wish that they both would be here with me today, but I have this great lil boy in my life and he is my world. I know it is really hard and sad. But count the blessing you have. I hope you and your family grow together and have a great life.

E.