Losing a Friend :(

My mother has a saying, which I have found helpful at times, maybe it will help you too. "People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime." Think about it; hopefully it will help you too! I have found it very helpful in the past. And you never know, as the other person said, your friend may circle back around.

My heart goes out to you, but I am a big believer that things happen for a reason. The important thing is that you tried. I never walk away from a friend unless I absolutely have no choice. I believe that we are all in each others lives because we need each other or one reason or another. Maybe your time has passed with this friend but will begin with a new friend soon. That, or your friend may change her mind in the long run. Either way, here's a virtual hug: *hug*. I hate that you have to lose someone you care about.

It's hard. I had a very close friend whose husband got a job in Montana and when she moved I cried for weeks. We went a couple of years later and spent a few days with them and it was obvious we had different interests and lives at that point. She had developed new hobbies and her kids had grown and didn't even remember me. We had spent hours doing crafts and sewing for the kids. I missed her for such a long long time still even then.

I am friends with her on FB, we are neighbors on several games, and love hearing her comments about her kids and things going on in her life. I think FB is one of the best things I ever did. I am in contact, albeit not the same, and have been able to see how things turned out for her. Maybe in time you'll be able to move on and make new friends.

Remember all the friends you had when you were a little girl, way back when? Where are they now? Didn't all of you somehow drift on to other people and other interests? There were no hard feelings (I hope), but it happened all the same.

It happens all the time. That doesn't make it any less sad. But you can hope your friend is happy doing what she's doing now. Aside from this situation, are you basically happy doing what you're doing now?

I agree with a previous writer: if you belong to God, He moves other people in and out of your life for good reasons. If it makes you feel any better, He also moves you in and out of the other people's lives, too!

Be very, very thankful that you have had this friendship with the woman. Be thankful also for the friends you have right now who think you're absolutely the best thing since focaccia. Or chocolate.

I'm so sorry its hard when a friendship seems to end. I think you need to try and let it go in your heart. I know you will be lonely for a while but try to get yourself into different activity groups if you can and book clubs to keep yourself busy. By stepping back and saying to your this hurts now but will dull with time will help you. Again I'm sorry for your heart being broken.

How many times I've been where you are! I believe that God places people in our lives for a reason and sometimes just a season. It's hard to let go of a friend when you have put so much of yourself into the relationship but they have not. I lost my one of my best friends years ago over something very stupid. She let go of the friendship even though I had continued to hang on. Finally I had to let her go. A couple of years ago she contacted me after not talking for about 6 years. Our friendship today isn't what it was years ago but I believe God brought us together again for a reason. Your friend's needs have changed and often it has NOTHING to do with you. It's all her. Let her go and make peace with it.

When our lives take different turns sometimes we meet again later and rekindle when the winding road meets up again.

This is always so tough...All you can tell yourself is that you tried your best... Better to let it go that to keep trying when she has no interest... You will just end up angry and resentful...

As difficult as it can often be, life is really about change. Accepting that with courage and perhaps even a little enthusiasm will help open new opportunities for you. It is sad to let go of a friendship or a love, though. I'm sorry it hurts.

I too have lost what I thought were good friends I would keep forever. Two girls I went through all of college as roomates with, through good times and bad for all of us...we were all ineach other's weddings, too....I was the last one to get married, and after that, they just dissappeared - even before my wedding, after college, I was like you, I was making all the trips to see them, etc. THEY Never came here to see me - the only exception was the wedding shower....I even tried to make MY WEDDING convienient for THEM, picking the middle of memorial day weekend, so they would have time off work already, and getting the brides maids dresses form David's Bridal in an assorment of styles , just specifiing the color, so they could pick a style they were comfy with.

Anyway, One of them is still "facebook friends" with me, but that is it, and not even much on there. SO I figured I did all I could and they just must've been "season" friends, for the time of college, till I got married and had kids.

Here is a little thing that helped me understand these things a Little:
People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you will know exactly what to do.

Some people come into our lives and quickly go.
Some people become friends and stay awhile...leaving beautiful footprints on our hearts... and we are never quite the same, because we have made a good friend!!!

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season...

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person or people involved; and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships, and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

May today there be peace within you.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities
that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received,
and pass on the love that has been given to you.
May you be content knowing that you are a child of God.
Let His presence settle into your bones,
and allow your soul the freedom to sing,
dance, and to bask in the sun.
It is there for each and every one of you.

Losing a Friend is hard, but you wil find more, if you go out and try!

Good Luck!

I have had a lot of friends come and go over the years. Losing a friend can be very painful, no matter what the reason is for the friendship ending. It's a loss that needs to be mourned. But as time goes on, it becomes less painful. New (and possibly better) friends come into your life. I know that doesn't make you feel better now, though.

Sorry you are going through this. Sending you hugs.

Aww I am sorry. It is hard when friends move away and get so wrapped up in their lives that we take a back seat. It is one of those life changes that make us hurt unless we see the good that the friendship has brought over the years. My best friend from school moved away and I have seen her when she would come back to town to visit family but then her parents passed and she stopped coming back often. We use to talk on the phone alot and keep in touch that way, but that slows down too as we get busy. Another friend and I spent a lot of time together as our kids were close in age and it was a lot of fun. She moved away and while we only see each other every few years and talk on the phone a few times a year, she is still on my mind all the time and they both are still two of the best friends a person could ask for. One thing is we do keep in touch through facebook a bit more, checking the new pictures and such gives us a sense of friendship too. When we do meet in person or on the phone it is like it was back before they moved away. Accept the fact that she has other priorities and that she still cares for you, it's just different now. Accept what she is willing to give and find friends who live close by to be your best pals.

I, too, went through a similar situation a few years back, although, I envy you that she actually gave you answers -- I struggled for what seemed like eternity trying to figure it all out. At least she had the courtesy and respect for you to help you see her side. That being said, of course, it isn't exactly a consolation and obviously you are upset. Please give yourself permission to grieve the loss of your friendship and you will find, in time, that you have grown from the experience and pardon the cliche, but find other (and most likely stronger) friendships.

What is it you need so badly from this person? Maybe it would be a good time to evaluate your life and work on rounding out the other dimensions (spirituality, education, marital relationship, other adult relationships, etc) so that the empty space once occupied by this one friendship is not so big. Going through this process will help prevent the same cycle from repeating with your next close friend.

Perhaps you could allow this particular relationship to change, without the loss of your friend. My most important friendships over the years have been the ones that are "low-maintenance". That is, we can go for long periods of time without seeing or hearing from each other, but when we do connect, it's as if no time has passed. These are also people who I can count on to be there when I need something, and they can similarly count on me. It's just that we don't have a lot of needs these days.

Good luck :)