I really have a desire to have another child. I have one daughter, Sophia. She is fourteen months old and is disabled. She was eleven weeks early and has some other medical conditions, needless to say, she requires 24-hours care. I don't want to diminish the quality of life that my daughter has, but only to give her a fulfilling life, in my mind that means at least one sibling. I guess my question would be about spacing, I don't want her to be too much older than the next child, but I don't want it to be too close either. I just want it to be right for our family. How many years between then should it be?
My boys are 16 months apart and my middle son and daughter are 23 months apart, they are so close and i love it. my best advice would be that if your oldest has developmental problems yu let her get to the point where she is either caught up before having another one, and i beleive with most premies this happens at about age 2.
It all depends on your family--there is no "right" age difference. I can tell you that my girls are 20 months apart, and I have my hands full. Granted, my husband works too much and traveled weekly for the first year of my second baby's life, so I did alot of solo parenting. The great thing about a close age difference like this, however, is that my older daughter was rarely jealous of the baby--she just loved her (colic and all). They are now 3 and 1, and they enjoy the same toys, videos, activities, etc. because they are so close. I would advise you to really do some soul searching on how much you think you can handle right now versus down the line. It's a big decision--good luck!
That is a completely personal decision. My children are 2 years, 2 months, 2 weeks and 2 days apart. I think in a "normal" situation that is a good amount....at least for my family. In your case you will have to take into consideration how much time is spent caring for your older child and the amount of time a new baby is going to take and whether or not you are physically and emotionally ready to take that on. Good Luck.
C.,
I agree with you that your daughter would benefit from a sibling. My mother is an only child and she says she regrets not having someone to talk to when she was growing up. As for how long to wait that's totally up to you. If you're ready now then go for it. I have a daughter who is alomost 14 months old and the only reason my husband and I want to wait until Feb or March of 08 is because we want a X-Mas baby. Only you know if you're ready. Best of luck. N. H.
I think alot of that depends on your preference. I myself knew that I wanted my children close together because I grew up with a sister that was two years younger and we got along great and still do. However, having them too close is also not as healthy for the child and mother. You need to allow your body time to heal and recoup any lost nutrients. My second child was actually due on my first child's 2nd birthday and by some standards this is considered high risk.
Hello C.. I belive you answered your question prior to asking. You need to do what is best or right for your family. The spacing of the children's ages all depends on your family. Your income, stability, patience, and etc. No one knows what is best for you other than you. Personally, I would make sure I could afford all that I have now with extra money left over before I tried for another baby. However, none of my babies were planned and we always found a way to make ends meet and they are all loved! Good Luck!
Hi C.: I've recently been polling people about this since I've been thinking about going back on birth control for the time being. Everybody's got a different opinion! But I just read a statistic in the book "Toddler 411" that said experts recommend having the two siblings 21/2 to 3 years apart. Of course, it all depends on your situation, lifestyle, etc. and, given your daughter's needs, it may make sense to wait a little longer. They also said that mothers wait at least 18 months between pregnancies to increase the odds of a healthier pregnancy. It's a great book, by the way. It's got all kinds of strategies for dealing with your toddler now and if/when you bring a new sibling home.
Good luck!
Exactly when to plan your child is up to you, but I would like to recommend having a sibling for sure. I don't know the details of how difficult it is raising your daughter. I do know that my high-maintenance child was first, but I am glad that I was able to have more. The sibling will B. born into your family and will not have any problems loving you and his/her sister just the way she is. I always seemed to wait about 2 years before trying so my babies are somewhere between 2 1/2 and 3 years apart. That works for us.
