Just Not Nice

She sounds like a bitter woman. Has she made any direct threats to you? My ex's g/f says the same things about me - wishes I was dead and says it's my fault he doesn't see his daughter - which isn't true. He and I get along very well, and every time I see something like that, or hear it, I make him aware of it. When it got really bad, she used to call my house and tell my DH that I was cheating on him....even though I was sitting on the couch next to him! lol You have already done the right thing by contacting the police and facebook - the only other thing I would suggest is filing a restraining order against her and take some self-defense classes if you are truely frightened that she may try something.

Good luck!

H.-
I would print out the pages and give them to the police. I would then post something on her wall (or if you're nicer, send her a message telling her she should update her privacy settings.)
S.

Aaaahh -- Facebook. It is as fun as it is dangerous. I have experienced something similar watching my ex-SIL post atrocious things about my brother and even about her own daughter (who is in her circle and can read the horrible things her mother posts - ish).

I guess for your own sanity, you gotta let it go unless you have other concerns that make you truly fear for your safety. My thinking is this...Facebook (and honestly any social network Mamasource included) gives people a feeling of anonymity. And that makes users feel it is OK to shed their normal conventions and say things they would never say out loud and in public.

One last thought though...print the pages that include her more alarming posts....In case you ever need to use them in court (i.e. custody, etc.).

'

I would ignore. Do you want her to think you care about her enough to check her FaceBook page? She'd get a thrill knowing you care what she thinks. Take the high road and ignore her sad little life. I'd go on my page and start talking about how wonderful and happy my life is!

Ok, I have to agree with Marie & Angie here. I can not see how old you are because your bio is not under your post, but I can tell you one thing.... I WOULD NOT care! I would not even give her the satisfaction of knowing that I went through looking her up on FB. Now do not get me wrong... I am part of the "Crackbook" (LOL) addicted junkies born in the 70's & am on it waaay too much, but I will say, I do not think I would give her the time of day. You guys must actully care about each other waaay too much to even look each other up. I persoanlly think she way just venting on her FB to her "friends". What do you care, I am sure you do not have friends in common. If you do, then they have their own opinions of you and your husband so why care? You do not have to care what her friends think. If you go back and post on her wall, that would be like high school. Just ignore it and stay off her page. As far as the "death threats", I really do not feel that is what they are. I think they are just evil, angry, venting that she is doing. It is a way to make her feel better. The people who replied with the "20 feet" comment are just edging her on. I do not even think I would print it or go to the police. The only way I would print it is if you guys were going for some type of court custody battle and it would be to prove she has personal dislikes towards you. The only other thing is if she was going to one of your place of employements and trying to demoral your character. She really is not doing anything illegal, just not nice... I do not think it is a "plot" just an anger emotional issue. Do NOT let her rope you in to being unhappy. When "EXes" cause you to get emotional and actually care about what they are doing and saying, they have actually won. Just move on with your life, know you got the man she doesn't and if you are happy, do not let her make you UNHAPPY.

If you believe it is a real threat then I would continue to go to the police and facebook. Although she is acting badly there is no reason to lower yourself to her level. I have an ex that likes to create problems and generally be rude - I do not feel the need to give him my energy on the subject.
I know it is hard, but I suggest you stop looking at her pages (unless you see a real threat here).

In all sympathy,
S.

Add a comment to her wall about the fact that her message is untrue.

Personally, I wouldn't do much. She is apparently not aware that you can see her pages. I wouldn't let on and use this opportunty to keep an eye on her. Clearly she has told her friends things about you. You can't stop her from having conversations surrounding you with her friends but you can use the info to keep up to date with what she is doing/saying.

Simply blow the whole thing off. Time passes, hopefully people heal.

She is obviously having problems with the whole situation.
If it were me, I'd check her friend list for people who may have read that on her wall who are mutual friends, husband's friends or family and email them directly clearing the air about that. Try to be the voice of reason and calm when you do so so that you don't end up proving her right in your common aquaintences eyes! Good luck, and sorry!

Ignore it. Don't fall to her petty level.

Print it off! If she erases it you won't have proof unless you go to the way back archives and they stored it.

Aside from that have more class than her and ignore her. She sounds like trash and why respond to trash. You know the truth and that is more important. Not to mention if she is trash so are her friends so who cares about defending your honor to more trash. So ignore her.

Not to mention I'm certain if you responded in kind more drama would insue. Just move along...

But don't forget to print it out! Who knows what you'll need it for. Heck you could use it while getting custody of the child to prove the mother is unfit.

I understand how upsetting this is. But please know that so often we transfer our anger and frustrations to other things. She is probably just upset about her life and "takinig it out" on you and your husband. Please let this go and stop looking at her page. I've learned that I am only as good as those influences around me and so I try to only keep good, uplifting people and influences. Don't get caught up in someone else's problems- especially when they choose to blame you. Someday she will come to grips with the truth. Until then, try to focus on your own family and the life you choose to lead each day. Good luck and God bless!

Print that off right away in case she decides to delete it! If you don't have it on paper she can make it disappear and say she never did it! I guess the easiest thing to do right now is keep checking back to see if she posts anything else and keep printing them and keep a record. It depends on the police, they might consider the hole digging, etc. as a threat...wouldn't hurt to ask. I guess as long as she is away from your ex and your kids, that's the best thing.

No matter what, stay civil! Sounds obvious, but not to many remember that when mad. She could have an account ok here. Someone she knows may. No matter what anything negative you say can and will come back and bite you in the rump. Look what happened already, you found out something she probably did of didn't want you to know. Be so sweet, have your husband be so sweet she will look bad on her own. Best of all she will begin to think you are the one that is looking for the backhoe!LOL But by all means do exactly as you did with the authorities. And don't retaliate, it would only give the authorities cause to believe it is nothing more than a squable to be over looked. Be stronge!

if you have already gone to the police, then i would leave it with them, any retaliation could go bad - i am so sorry, that is slanderous

For Pete's sake, let it go. If you re-read your post you will see how childish she is. To respond is to stoop to the same low level. You know the truth, your husband knows the truth and probably those who know her also know the truth. Nothing else matters. Avoid the desire to get even, it "ain't gonna happpen".

You said you already reported it to the police. Ask them if you have any other recourse. Otherwise, the only other suggestion I have is stop looking at her page. You have nothing to gain by continuing to do so.

You could put something on her wall about how it isn't true and such but then she will just know you are watching her and turn that on you. It is just talk... it isn't like she is actually going to do you in. Someone who is going to do that isn't going to put it on facebook. She is dramatizing the relationship she has with your husband which means she still has feelings for him and knows she can't go back. I don't know how long they were apart or how long until you came back into the picture but she has to blame someone. Ignore it... you are a better person that way

She sounds very immature and jealous of your life with your husband. I wouldn't let her traumatize you. She would love to know that you are stressed by this. Would make her day. I would let it go. You've done all you can.