L.M.
I would simply word the invitation to not mention the dinner after since it is not for everyone. You can add a side note to those you want to come to the dinner (or just verbally tell them).
Hey Ladies
I am in the process of ordering my daughter's Baptism invitations. We are Baptizing at a Cathedral & I originally was only inviting our immediate family & going to dinner for the after since the Baptism is on a Sunday after 2p.m. & I have a tight budget. However the priest advised us at the meeting that we should invite everyone. Estranged family members, neighbors etc...I am open to that & would love everyone to join us as it will be a beautiful event, I am just stuck on how to invite everyone if i wont be hosting a reception following the ceremony. How do I word it? I don't want to be rude. How do I nicely say that they are welcomed to the Baptism & nothing else? I will have a Baptismal favor to hand out at the end of the mass.
I would simply word the invitation to not mention the dinner after since it is not for everyone. You can add a side note to those you want to come to the dinner (or just verbally tell them).
Can you have your cake and eat it too? Is there a fellowship room at the church? can you put on two pots of coffee and buy a sheetcake and have all attendees mix and mingle over coffee? you'll be out of pocket say $25-$35 total. Then have your immed family for dinner like you planned.
Your invitations could read - DS's baptism is set to take palce at XX pm on Sunday June __ at >>> Church located at (address). Light refreshments to follow in the fellowship room......
Enjoy.
Etiquette wise this is handled by not putting reception following on the invitation. If the invitation doesn't say there's a reception there is no reception. You'd then go to dinner with your immediate family.
I'd try not to talk about dinner at the baptism so that no one gets their feelings hurt but if it comes up you can repeat that there is no reception and just the immediate family is going to dinner.
This is pretty common in our church. What we usually do, is invite them to the baptism ceremony or other event without any mention of the word reception. Then, the people that will be invited to the dinner, those invitations get a little insert in their invitation that invites them to the dinner/reception with the time, date and location.
Are you inviting some people to an intimate gathering ? why not just put it on their invites and order half to say one thing and half to say another.
If there is nothing shown on the invite then I would assume nothing is being followed.
" Ceremony Event Only Taking Place "
( in nice small words at the bottom of the invite)
I would have the invitation for the Baptism and then just invite the individual people to meet up at the place you're eating. It's a family meal, not a reception.
Why should you invite "everyone"? This is a special day for your family and you should only invite the people who you really want. That being said, it is considered somewhat rude to invite people to the ceremony but not the reception. You should in no way feel that you have to pay for anyone's lunch though. You have two options. Just invite the people special to you and then have a small reception (that is what I would do). Or you can send out invites with just the baptism ceremony info and just tell only those you you plan to invite to the reception personally. That could get awkward if anyone not invited to the reception asks, but it's your call.
I second the insert to only the dinner guests idea....
If the priest is picking up the tab, then it's ok to invite everyone:)
Proper etiquette, you can't invite some to the cathederal but not to the dinner. You invite the quests you can afford to pay for. We only do nice brunch for the godparents and their immidate family.
Is the baptism during the regular church service? If so, you are certainly not obligated to invite everyone!! If it is a private ceremony then I would think those who are attending are already invited to dinner afterward right?
I really don't know. All four of my kids I invited everyone on the phone or in person. I have never heard of sending out invitations and my ex's mom was big on using the mail system. Maybe this is a regional thing.
There just isn't much you can put in there, ya know? You are invited, name date time place.
Sorry I can't be more help.
Well looking at the other responses it must be a regional thing.
Oh but this may be helpful, you can order the paper and print it on your computer, that way you can change the wording to what ever you want.
I'm surprised that the priest is concerned with who you are inviting. Our priest never asked at neither of my kids' Baptisms. If it were me, I would still just invite immediate family and possibly close friends. I also believe Baptism is a beautiful event but would feel uncomfortable inviting everyone I know.
Sorry...doesn't really answer your wording question.