Insists on a Diaper for #2 - Minneapolis,MN

Updated on August 12, 2006
N.H. asks from Minneapolis, MN
8 answers

My 3 year old son has been toilet trained since his third birthday with respect to #1. He does not wear a diaper during the day or at night. He stays dry all night and never has an accident. The problem is with #2. He absolutely refuses to go #2 in the toilet. He will hold it all day at school and then ask for a diaper when he gets home. We have tried: (1) Offering him big rewards if he goes #2 on the potty (new fire truck, new trains); (2) "Running out of diapers"; (3) Allowing him to sit on the potty for as long as he wants with books, toys, etc. He will sit on the potty for up to 45 minutes, but will not go #2. If we don't give him a diaper, he will go to bed without going #2, but will then wake up in the middle of the night screaming, at which point we will give him a diaper. He seems to have some very legitimate fear and we have to figure out how to get him over it. (BTW, we do have seat that goes on the toilet so he's comfortable, and we have dumped his #2 from his diaper into the toilet and he has happily flushed it down). Some other details that may or may not be relevant: He is a very stubborn and emotional child, but also exceptionally intelligent (according to his teachers). When he goes #2 in his diaper, it takes him a pretty long time; he'll go behind a chair or into his room and I can see his face getting all red. Any suggestions would be appreciated!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

After talking with a friend about her own guys fear of poohing I tried this:
I made a big elaborate story about how the poop goes down with Mommies poop and Daddies poop and they all get together to have a pooh party. And how his poop was said because it missed Mommies poop and wanted to go to the party. "Didn't he want his poop to go to the party?" I thought it was pretty funny when she told me and I fealt pretty funny telling my ds. But after telling him that a couple of times and the antisipation of a big special present that he can pick out we had it licked in a week.
Best of Luck!

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi N.!

My sister-in-law had that exact same problem with her boy around the same age also...Any the did realize that he was holding it in and it got pretty bad and the dr. put him on Miralax with is totally safe stool softener, but it will make it so that he cannot hold it in any longer..Once it started not to hurt, he was able to go on the toliet and he was weaned of the Miralax.. I do know that she still makes bran muffins and feeds him lots of fruit for snacks during the day, etc..yogurt covered rasins...just to make sure that there is no relapse..But if you aren't in a hurry to correct the problem, I am sure that it will correct it self sooner or later! Good luck! I hope this helps! But for sure talk to your dr. about it...and i know they all use Miralax quite often! :)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.

answers from Minneapolis on

Obviously he knows he has to poop if he is asking for a diaper everytime. Have you talked to him about why he insist on a diaper? Maybe it hurts him in which case he is probablly constipated. Make sure he is getting lots and lots of fiber! The other thing to try is to have him take off his own diaper and clean himself up after he poops. He can go in the tub so you dont have to worry about a mess all over the floor! Realizing the trouble not to mention the mess (and smell) of taking care of it himself might make a difference! (This worked for a friend!)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

N.,
I have been in your exact situation for well over a year with my now 41/2 old son. Same temperment, intelligence,same everything. I don't have a solution only a bit of advice. My pediatrician, who I have alot of respect for, told me the more I push for him to go on the toilet the more he will push back. They don't have much control in their lives and this is the one thing they can control. Be happy that he does go in the diaper b/c so many children have serious bowel/constipation issues. This is much more prevalent than most realize-I wouldn't worry about it until he is well into his 4's. ps. mine one day just sat down and miraculously pooped-yours will too!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

This sounds a bit like our son who was completely trained a month after his third birthday. He had a total of 3 pee accidents after he decided it was the right time to stop using the diaper. However, initially he was still resistant to going #2 on the toilet. We noticed too that #2 was ususally behind a big potted plant or away in a corner. And he always squatted. Most kids are used to squatting and going #2 and sitting on the toilet doesn't allow for the squatting. So my husband told him to squat on the toilet - both feet on the lid with his rear hovering over the lid. It sounds precarious and it is a little unnerving the first 10 times, but there were never any falls into the toilet! I tell you this suggestion because our son's issue was still needing/wanting to squat while going #2. Once he was taught the trick of squatting on the toilet lid, #2 was never an issue again. He's now 5 and does not squat anymore. I was a little worried about that, but eventually as he matured he desired to sit on the toilet like the rest of us. Good luck! I hope you find a suggestion that works for you and him.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.

answers from Minneapolis on

It sounds as though your son suffers from constipation. Have you talked to his Dr? Try some prune juice and see if that helps, otherwise you may need a prescription. I know my Pediatrician said constipation can make potty training near impossible. Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.F.

answers from Minneapolis on

The only thing I could come up with is having him poop in his diaper in the bathroom, as a way to transition. Like other moms, my guess is, this will ultimately correct itself regardless of what you do.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi N.,
I have an almost 3 year old and he had a hard time wih #2 on the potty too. For him it was the fear of getting flushed down the toilet. I've also heard that little ones feel like they are letting something that is apart of them go, almost a seperation anxiety. Sounded strange to me too, but Louis says goodbye to his #2 and says we'll make more tomorrow.

I would also reccomend the book "Everyone Poops" .
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0916291456/ref=pd_bxgy_i...

And "Where's the poop?"
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060530898/sr=8-4/qid=11...

I hope one of these helps you.

M.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions