I'm Going Crazy with Messes!!!!,

Get a storage bin and start collecting the messes. When she sees that her things are missing and wants them back, make her earn them back.

She will see that it is easier to put things away then have to work for them.

If it is on the floor it goes into a big bag and she does not get it back until she proves she can put some things away. Now at five, she does not have to,clean up the entire house, but she must learn to put her things away. Once she sees you are serious, things should change.

I can't say this enough:
The key to having a clean and organized home is not having a lot of stuff.
Even so, we ALL need to learn to clean up after ourselves, so if/when she DOES create a mess simply do not allow her to move on to the next activity until the previous activity has been cleaned up.
This is something my kids learned, and did, in preschool, so it was easily reinforced at home.

For a 5-year old I'd say you need to hover more and make sure she cleans up before moving on to another activity. If you find a mess that you didn't know she made (like the pencils on the stairs), she has to clean it up AND she loses the privilege of having the toy until she earns it back.

When my daughter was younger, I just had to stay after her to clean up. I reserved 15 minutes before bed for her to tidy up her room.

Now that she's 12, she knows if she leaves it out after bed, she loses it. So if I find stuff of her's in the family room after she's in bed--it's lost! She has to earn it back with a chore.

At age 5 she's just learning.

Also, look into the House Fairy. That worked for us for a long time! The House Fairy is Santa's sister and she stops by unnanounced to check and see if a room is tidy. If it is she leaves a small prize, if not then she leaves "fairy dust" (confetti). She may return the next day to see if the room has been cleaned so she can leave a prize. There is a whole website and program you can use. I used to buy things from the dollar section that my daughter needed anyway like a new toothbrush, hair rubber bands, stickers and sometimes the House Fairy leaves a healthy snack! It's funny how my daughter would want to eat a healthy snack left by the House Fairy but not want to eat it if I offered it to her myself!! LOL!

She's only 5. For me, now that my kids are grown, messes fall under the category of small stuff that I never should have gotten worked up about.

Personally I think it's easier to pick up stuff myself rather than nag 5 year olds. Caps will get lost and markers will dry out, accept that and buy new ones at a dollar store -- it's less stressful and easier in the long run than worrying about where the caps are. Stuff comes and goes.

You may be doomed to live with a messy child -- some kids are messier than others. Accept it and realize that in the long run those messes won't matter and you won't care about the markers at all once your kids are grown, you will only miss the lost opportunities to have fun with your babies while you still could.

"Uh oh, you forgot something on the stairs. Go see what it is!"
I usually give my son (now 6) a prompt so that I am not his clean-up gal.

Plates on the table. "Thanks for washing up after dinner. You forgot something at the table."

Clothes on the floor. "Looks like you forgot to take care of your pajamas/day clothes. Go do that now."

It does take a lot of reminding, however, I chose not to do it for him.

If you choose, anything left on the stairs or in another dangerous place can go in 'time out' for toys. That's usually five days or so in our house.

Kids live in the present and are pretty oblivious, so I try not to make it so much of a control issue. Instead, I look also for times when natural consequences can step in. Sometimes when the old plates aren't cleared from snacktime and dinner rolls around, I just leave his dinner plate on the counter, let him come to the table and 'discover' his mess from earlier. Favorite clothes don't make it into the wash? "Wow, that's a bummer, huh? Better get them into the laundry!" When he has to look for shoes or a coat or backpack because they weren't put away properly.... "yeah, it's hard when we forget to put our things away where they usually go. Go find it now and put it in a place where you will find it next time."

Lastly, if things aren't put away responsibly, I sometimes give one warning "If I see X out one more time, it will be going away for a week." Especially things like scissors or markers on the floor or legos which have migrated off their designated area. I like a tidy house and I think that learning how and why to keep things picked up is an important life skill. I don't expect my son to clean up my messes, and I wouldn't be doing him any favors by doing all of his picking up. I just help when asked, if the job is big or if he's tired, and we just get it done.

Anytime she leaves something out, don't say anything about it. Put it in a big clear tote somewhere she can see it. She is NOT allowed to play with anything in the tote. If she wants something in it, she has to EARN it back by doing a chore. (When you get the tote, you can explain that it is for things that she leaves out. She won't get warnings when you find messes, she just loses them to the tote.) Anything that stays in the tote for more than 3 weeks, gets donated to charity... If she can't pick up her toys, they can go to some other kid who doesn't have enough toys to make messes with. (That can be your reasoning. Lol. Just be sure you are willing to stick to your guns on that, or don't do it at all.)

OR, Maybe you are going to have to micromanage her for a while... Keep a closer eye on what she is doing, and every time she stops one activity to I've on to the next, stop and have her clean up her mess. DON'T help her with it... Just tell her that it's HER mess, and she has to clean it up before she can play with anything else.

With the markers, I would either ditch them for crayons until she can store them properly, or dole them out to her. She has to come to you for each new marker. She has to put the lid on the one she has, and hand it to you before she gets to pick another one.

I am convinced no matter how hard or often you supervise your children in situations that require cleaning up after, and no matter how many days, weeks and months you follow them, stalk them, ignore them or otherwise almost take their hands and pick it up with them, a person has to have an innate sense and desire to clean or create order. Thus justifies why there are shows like 'Hoarders'. Even if mom or dad doesn't teach them to clean, that is certainly taught in preschools, kindergarten, and grade school. They are taught to be responsible for themselves. By the time college rolls around they are supposed to know what to do RIGHT? So then why, when I was in Paralegal school did the teacher, an attorney, bring pencils and pass them out for tests? Because there are children like your daughter and my younger son. the older one has the same MOm, (me) and is tidy and efficient, and the younger one is your pencil tosser. Enjoy her for all else and if it makes you crazy, there are a lot of maid services out there for that eventual clean up. HUG

Welcome to motherhood. I supervised when my boys used markers or pencils.

We have a system that has helped. If clean up isn't happening, I set a timer and tell the kids that they have x minutes to clean up before I take toys away. When the timer is done, I get a container and start picking up anything left on the floor. Once it's in the bin, it stays there until the kids "earn" it back (by earning stars for chores). At the end of each month, I go through the bin and get rid of anything they don't frequently play with and they can "buy" back the rest. It has really helped with our older child because there have been several times that she missed picking up something she really likes and then misses having it until she can earn it back.

Certainly part of it is simply the never ending process of parenting and teaching (you've made a mess now you must clean it up) but the other part is knowing exactly how much responsibility your kids can handle at any given time/age.
It wouldn't be fair, for example to give a two year old access to several paint pots and paint brushes and then expect him to clean up the inevitible mess, would it?
If your daughter is not mature enough to handle pencils and markers responsibly then they should be taken away, or at the very least she should have only a very limited supply.
Art and school supplies should be treated with respect and care IMO. Once she starts school she will learn this lesson well, teachers are very good at teaching children both personal responsibility and about being respectful of the group's shared belongings.

From now on, I would try reminding her ONCE to pick them up (Since she is still only 5) and then if you still find that mess on the floor after 10 or so minutes... Take whatever it is away. Wasted markers? Well, no more markers. Pencils on the floor? Well, no more pencils (Or only allowed to use pencils at the kitchen table).

I dont let my kids move on to the next activity till they have it completely cleaned up. I used to stand by them until it was cleaned up to my satisfaction. Now they know how i like it and will do it without me standing there. Sometimes they will "try" to move on without the space being cleaned to my satisfaction but I will get them and make them come back.

By now my kids know how I like the house to look. When I can't stand their rooms anymore, my famous line is "would you like to clean your room or would you like me to clean it". They know what this means, so they get to it right a way, before I get out the big garbage bags to clean their rooms.

Maybe you can let your daughter have a space that can get a bit messy and you won't have big expectations of how clean the area has to be. For me it's the basement. I'm much more lenient about the basement cause I can't see it. So it doesn't make me look like a complete nag since I let them have an area that I am not a psycho clean freak about.

I didn't give my son markers or pencils till he was about 7 or 8 yrs old.
The markers WOULD dry out and pencil lead just broke too much.
He had plenty of crayons.

If she can't be responsible with things, don't give them to her.
Give her access to very few toys at a time so she runs out of things to mess with.
Not just Toy Time Out - more like a Toy Time Share.
If she wants a toy that she currently doesn't have access to, she has to trade one she has with you to be swapped out - so she still only has access to 3 as a total (or what ever number you choose - just make sure the number is within YOUR tolerance level).
If that means 1 doll, 1 stuffed animal and 1 ball to play with - so be it.
By letting her have access to things she refuses to pick up or care for - you are enabling her - to drive you crazy.
Less is just a whole lot more manageable.

I tell my son ( he's 6) that he has until the end of the day to pick his playroom and if he doesn't I get a trash bag and anything I pick up is mine for a couple days. I know my neighbor also does this because we were talking about it the other day. I even tell my son that if he is picking up his playroom and doing a good job that I will come in and help. Usually after a few times of doing this he gets the point.

Some kids are better about this than others. Some kids are naturally neat. Some are naturally messy. A naturally messy one will have a lot of trouble if there is too much to take care of. Sounds like your 5 year old is one of these kids...

I'd start paring down - you probably have too much stuff. If there were less to take care of, it would make it easier on both of you.

I do agree with Cheerful's assessment that she is still young. Instead of being sick of nagging her having to ask her to clean up, change your thought process about her. She is only 5 and a little girl. There are grown men who aren't any better. You're lucky if you don't have a husband like that...

I clean up messes all day, every day. Today I cleaned for 6 hours straight (the toddler just played and baby didn't get much one on one). Older kids were at camp so that helped or I'd referee fights. Some was productive like laundry, some was picking up an entire half-bag of Goldfish scattered and crushed on the floor while I did laundry. Our 5-year-old is the worst at messes. Only when school starts do I get a breather.

I agree with those that say don't give her items she won't take care of. I put all things like puzzles, markers, play dough up high so that my kids had to ask to use them. Then I would watch over them in a way while using them. When I noticed they lost interest I told them they had to pick them up before they moved on to play other things. With things like markers I believe she will get better with putting tops on in time.

Its not always fool proof but it definitely helps.

Pick it up or it's mine for a week. Markers can be moistened by putting the time in water just long enough to wet it. Then let it sit point down for a day.

The other idea is give her less. She only needs one pencil.

Also teach the saftey issue. Pencils roll and if they are on the stairs someone could step on one and fall down the stairs breaking their arm. If there is stuff all over the floor you could trip on it and get hurt.

I used to have a big black garbage bag. Anything left on the floor or not put away after being played with went into the bag and didn't come out for a few weeks. It took a few years of getting stuff confiscated occasionally to finally sink in - put it away or it gets taken away. I'm happy to say that the 12yr old and the 15yr old are super neat and tidy (I'm still working on the 10yr old - but at least her mess is kept in her room, the rest of the house is immaculate!)