I Need Some Help for Me and My Mom

Try Dr. Neil Lovitt. He is with the JPS Network. His office is on 1400 Main St Suite 507 behind JPS Hospital. We have had some problems with my grandmother who is diabetic and he found she was taking too many pills which was causing her to not be able to do anything but sleep. He has actually gotten her back to normal. She is doing everything on her own now. She feels great. He believes in alot of natural remedies so let him know if you are interested. He listens and really makes you feel like he is concerned and will try to go beyond to get you well. He takes infants to adults. He also used to be a gynocologist. I have switched my family and other friends have switched also to him. His Phone # is ###-###-####

Tonia T

I would be going to the ER and sitting there till they gave me some answers. She is in chronic pain. She might need nursing care 24/7. It might be time for a nursing home even if it is for a short time.
Good luck.. I know you are going crazy.

It might be that your mom needs to go to a rehabilitative center or nursing home for at least awhile. It's a tough decision but you have to do what is best for your family also. My mother had to have some surgery and became unable to be alone but since I was not qualified in any medical way she stayed in a nursing home. It is a tough decision but at this point it sounds like she needs medical care not family care. BTW hydrocodone IS extremely addictive (speaking from experience here) after some surgery in my past I took it and well, life is so much easier when you feel no pain! But eventually you have to take control, easier said than done (I've been extremely blessed). There are low income housing apartments around that you should probably look into for her. I don't think I'd give the docs a talking to, you don't want to alienate them! But I sure would ask for some help. Neurosurgeons are surgeons, they do the operation and then want to be done with you - they don't know how to deal with aftercare! I had a brain tumor removed and had so many problems afterwards, the surgeon just new nothing about aftercare - It was my personal physician that helped me get help to recover. If she is receiving SSI I think it's possible to get advice concerning care options from them also. I'm so sorry you have so much to handle, it's very difficult I remember. Do you not have any other family of hers that could help also? I wish I had a good solution to offer you but other than empathy I don't (although this makes me realize that I need to have a plan in place for my own care so that my daughter will not be in your place some day) God Bless you and you mother -try to pray, God will help provide an answer.

Hey A.,

You didn't say whether or not your mom was on medicare. I know that medicare for older adults doesn't kick in until after the age of 60, but if your mom is disabled and unable to work, she can qualify early. I speak from experience here because my mom had a stroke at 54 that disabled her, and we were able to get her on medicare. From the sound of it, she needs a new set of doctors, and I know that can be rough if she's uninsured right now.

I agree with the other poster about looking into nursing home care for your mom. Trust me, I know how scary even the thought of that can be, because I've already dealt with that with my own mom. One thing to remember, though, is that just because she's going into a nursing home doesn't mean she isn't coming out. That's a big misconception for a lot of people - that once you're there you're there for good. We found out that more than 75% of patients are actually discharged after a few weeks or months. It would also be the best place to deal with her addiction to hydrocodone, because it does sound like she's addicted to it. They have procedures set into place about that, and trust me, you're mom won't be able to guilt them into giving her more, which is what it sounds like she's doing with you.

I know how overwhelming this whole thing is, but you're not alone, and you're not without resources. If she hasn't been declared legally disabled, I would look into that, because it will open up a lot of doors as far as getting better medical help is concerned, and it may even increase her SS payments. But even if she can't be, there are private and non-profit support networks in place to help you wade through the red tape of finding care for her.

I really do think round-the-clock care for her is the best thing, for all involved. For one, she'll get the care and attention she needs to improve, without relying on the mind-numbing hydrocodone, your kiddos won't be exposed to the chaos and confusion anymore, and your home can become your family's safe haven again. If it's a hard decision, and I know it can be, just think of your kids and how much better they'll feel about not having to worry about grandma crying hysterically all day. You may have to invoke your power of attorney to get her in there, if she's anything like my mom, but trust me when I say it really can be a life-saving alternative.

If you need any help or have any questions, please don't hesitate to PM me and ask me anything.

Wishing nothing but the best for you,

E.