How to Help Ease My 6 & 10 Year Old Sons Fear of the Closet!

Updated on June 25, 2008
L.M. asks from Gainesville, TX
18 answers

My 6 year old son and my 10 year old stepson is afraid of going into their bedroom in evenings - nights, even to open their closet..
They claimed they saw a ghost and said the door was always open when they closed it. (They were never scared before til about 2 weeks ago!!) They are so afraid and I had to comfort them, I tried everything, My husband even had to sleep with them, we camped out on the floor them,They slept with us on our king size bed, Thank goodness we kept our king size bed!! Anyhoo, we invented "monster sprays", all kinds and nothing works! HELP!
The boys were gone for 2 days spending the nights with NaNa, Me and my husband had finally had a good sleep, we slept most of the day for past 2 days, doing NOTHING! We still trying to come up with more ideas and we are well planned for tonight in case they are afraid again!
Any ideas?
Thanks in advance..

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L.W.

answers from Houston on

My niece had nightmares, I suggested giving her Dr Bach Rescue Remedy about 30 minutes before bed. 3 or 4 drops under the tongue is all it takes. They did this for 3 or 4 nights in a row, and no more bad dreams. You can find Rescue Remedy at Whole Foods, most health food stores, I've even seen it at Fiesta. (this also works for thunder, etc, and also works on pets!) Good luck.
L.

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C.H.

answers from Houston on

I remember having a paralyzing fear of the dark since I was a tiny child. Nothing "happened" that my parents knew of. I would suddenly start trembling and shrieking. It took a long time of hugging and rocking and comforting, then just the thought of dark would make me afraid. Could you leave the light on in their room and closet? You might put a lamp on a timer at say 4pm so it would never be dark in there. A nightlight made it more scary to me. I needed Light. I still will not go outside at night alone. Great job for not negating their fear!

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W.C.

answers from San Antonio on

Maybe put a light in the closet and leave the door open.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.K.

answers from Houston on

At our house, we prop a chair up against the door to keep the closet monster trapped inside. We have also tied bells and other things to the chair so it would make noise if the closet monster tried to move it.

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J.L.

answers from Austin on

Hi L.,

Have you tried letting them sleep with the closet light on and leaving the closet door open?

If the light in the closet is too bright, try putting in a lower watt bulb that won't keep them awake but that still allows them to see into the closet.

J.,
Austin

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K.W.

answers from Beaumont on

My sister had a similar sit with her 3 yr old daughter. It was pretty scary.
So I did a little research, and found these 2 solutions:

Place a BIBLE in the room.
A BLACK CANDLE absorbs negativity.

The bible worked.

We now try a place a bible in every room, just to be safe.
The theory is that it puts the spirit at peace.

Good Luck

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M.B.

answers from Houston on

As part of our night time routine, we say bedtime prayers. The kids each say a prayer. Then I say one. I say, "Dear God, please keep _____ and _____ safe and comfortable all night long. Give them only good and happy and funny dreams, and please keep away all the bad dreams and nightmares. In Jesus' name. Amen." I got the idea from a friend, and it seems to really help. We also keep a nightlight on from 8pm until around 10pm. Then we turn it off.

I remember reading a post on another forum about monsters in the closet...The mother told her children that monsters don't come into their house because Mommy is so mean and tough that the monsters are afraid of her. I don't know if my son would believe that. But it was a unique and creative response.

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N.D.

answers from Houston on

If you are a Christian you can and should take authority over any unclean spirits (spirit of fear, evil, whatever it may be)in your home. Praying in the name of Jesus is very powerful. If anyone reading wants to know how to become a Christian I would like to share it. The Bible tells us that ALL of us have sinned and fallen short of God's intentions for our life. It also says that the penalty for sin (not plural, just one) is eternal separation from God. Someone has to pay for our sin and that's what Jesus came to earth to do. God made a way for us all to be with Him forever. We can spend eternity with Him if we accept His free gift of His sacrificed Son who died on the cross in our place. When we agree with God, tell him we're sorry for our sins and accept His gift of salvation we become Christians. We are not Christians because our parents were, because we know a little about Jesus, because we pray to God but run our own lives, because we attend church. It's all about accepting Jesus into our hearts and allowing Him to be Lord over our lives. The Lord is a Gentleman. He will not force Himself on anyone but when invited He comes to live in our hearts and home. He really wants to be intimate with all of us. He is the only one who will be true and faithful to you all of your life no matter what you're going through. So many are deceived these days. Don't be one of them. There's a heaven and a hell and each one of us will be somewhere for all eternity. Invite the Holy Spirit of God in your home and you'll witness a great difference!

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M.L.

answers from Houston on

My kids fear the dark as well. Here are some suggestions that I used. I put special locks on the windows to help lock everything out. They are cheap and can be found at any hardware store. I also bought my youngest a dream catcher. I told her it protects her from bad thoughts and dreams (she actually still has it hanging and will not let me move it). I also told her about how strong her dad was. The greatest impact came when I told her how strong God and her special angels will protect her. We talk about angels often at times, not just when she is scared. I think this faith has helped her the greatest, but it was a combination of different approaches.

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C.G.

answers from Austin on

hmmm do you have a night video monitor? I use one to watch my son at night. If so face the camera towards the closet door and let the kids know you will be watching the closet while they are sleeping. Next day let them know that you saw nothing and everything is fine. Also sometimes when the A.C. kicks on it can create a wind tunnel under a door and open it. Maybe explain to them a practical explanation. :) I think I watch too much ghost hunters:) Good luck.
p.s. When I was about 10 years old I thought I saw something in my room. I am sure I was just dreaming it while slowly waking up. I remember screaming and my parents came to check on me. They didn't offer for to me sleep with them since I shared a room with my twin. THe next night I was fine sleeping in my room. Maybe the kids now want to use their experience/or fear to sleep with mom:)
C.~

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K.B.

answers from Houston on

First, I would try to look into what caused them to think that their are monsters in the closet. When I was little I started hearing noises and seeing things in my closet. I would eventually end up sleeping with my parents. They grew tired of my fear so one night they had me sleep in my brothers room while my brother slept in my room. Well a little while after we switched we heard my brother screaming. We all came to my brother where he was...even my cat. He told us that he heard noises in the closet. My dad opened the closet door and when he did my cat ran in their and found a rat! All of those noises that my brother and I heard were the results of a curious rat. Not all things are as they appear. Just don't forget to listen to your kids cause there can be something behind their fears. Good Luck!

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S.O.

answers from San Antonio on

Keep the light on in the closet. Maybe give them flashlights.

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K.C.

answers from Houston on

try having them check all the locks and windows then have them look every where that a "ghost or monster" has been in their rooms. You will need to go with them so you can check too. After they have done this explain that the locks keep monsters and ghost out of the house and that you will never let one in no matter what. Also I saw on another persons page that you can use a magic vaccum to catch all the monsters and ghost by explaining it to them that they are going to be vaccumed up let them watch ghostbuster's so they can see that it is possible.

My son had the fear also and I to this day have him lock all the doors and check all the windows. It seems to help him and hes only 5 years old. Hope this helps

R.D.

answers from College Station on

A couple of years ago my boys came to me in a complete terror...they said there was a ghost in the bathroom shower!!! They were almost in hysterics. Sooo...I went with them into the bathroom...with all the lights off and I asked them to show me the ghost! The whole upstairs was dark... It took a LONG time to get them to come into the bath room with me, we went right up to that and then...I turned on the LIGHT!!! When they saw their GHOST turn into a SWIMSUIT...everything changed! We still have some of this, it is natural...but that one thing made a huge impact on how scared they get.

ALSO, we always tell the kids to pray when they feel scared. For BOTH of them it ALWAYS works...

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P.L.

answers from Houston on

With my son we gave him his own flashlight to sleep with and told him they're afraid of the light, that's why you don't see them during the day. So he had a "weapon" against them. Or you could just try telling them they're not real. Or maybe if you don't want to discourage that sort of thinking, they're friendly ghosts. Maybe they're a little scary, but they won't hurt you. I don't know how spiritual you are, but you could tell them to pray whenever they see the ghost, that God will protect them and take it away. Just a few ideas you could try.

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H.B.

answers from Austin on

Dear L.,

Your son seeing ghost could be real. These kids that are coming into this world now are very gifted, they call them Crystal kids and Indigo kids. I suggested you read a book by Doren Virtue on Crystal kids. These are special kids with psychic gifts. I know that for I have 3 kids myself with these gifts. You just need to acknowlege what he is seeing and assuring him that it is Ok and he is special. I had a lot of training in this because of my kids who are amazing. You can contact me or call me if you are intrested and I can walk you through the process and help you like my teachers hlped me.

H.

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A.H.

answers from Houston on

Dear L.,

I have a nine year old son that has had some similar fears. I talk to him about my own childhood fears and imaginings and how our imaginations can scare us and that there is always an explanation for what we think we see or hear, ie., reflections, wind, shadows. There are some books out there for kids on the subject too. Your librarian should be able to help you find some. I also help him to realize that such fears and imaginings are a normal part of growing up, but that we have to overcome them as part of growth too.
We believe in God and that we are always under His care and protection and that we can call on Jesus and our Guardian Angels and our Blessed Mother Mary to always help and protect us.

Finally, if he is really scared and in need of sleeping with me, he can. I do the above helps to give him courage and to help him get past the sometimes scarey stages in growing up.

For you and your hubby, remember that this is just a normal stage and it too shall pass. Just love them through it.

Hope this helps.

God bless,
A.

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M.T.

answers from Austin on

Hello L.,
Don't be too quick to dismiss what your boys may have seen. More than likely they did see something. My son and I have had many experiences with ghosts. I myself am an Indigo Child and my son is a Crystal Child. This is the era of the Crystal Children and many are being born or have been born. They are very sensative to spirits and ghosts. You will need to teach your children how to handle ghosts that scare them. Your older son will probably understand better but you may still have to regulate who or what is allowed to come into your house. Some ghosts don't mean to scare people but sometimes your able to see how they died which isn't always pretty. You will have to set the rules and also sit down with your boys and have them talk about it. If you discuss it with them it will be easier for them to understand and be able to handle future ghosts and spirits. Don't worry, your boys seeing ghosts is not neccessarily work of the devil. I'm a Christian and can tell you that ghosts are very real but you have to educate yourself on how to regulate it. You don't want to tell your boys that there is no such thing because if they start telling themselves that they will lose their gift and God gave them that gift for a reason. There are a lot of books you can read that will help you through all of this and tell you how to handle future encounters because there will be more. They do get easier but you may still have a scary one slip in there here and there.

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