Monsters in My 3-Year-old's Room! HELP!

Let him sleep with a flashlight and/or nightlight, or some stuffed animals (that he feels might "protect" him). On the worst nights tell him he can crawl into bed with his brother.

I have no idea if this will work but you could try telling him that monsters only come once a year around Halloween so come November 1st there will be no more monsters. Until then buy him the movie Monsters, Inc. and maybe he'll befriend his monsters.

There is a wonderful children's book by Robert L. Crowe. "Clyde Monster" is about a little monster who is afraid to go to bed at night because he is afraid there are people in his room who will get him. He thinks there are boys and girls hiding under his bed, in his closet, etc. His mother asks him if he ever knew a monster who had been scared by people. She tells him that a long time ago people and monsters made a deal not to scare each other. It is very cute and very effective.

Hi E.,
We had that happen at the same age. I can't remember where I heard this idea but it worked for us. I asked my son who was the moster. Where does it live. how old is it(it's usually a kid) where's it's parents, is it scared too? And whatever else could come up for questions. Eventually we had a little boy monster that lived in the attic missing his daddy and mommy but wasn't really scary any more. We told it good night and included it in our story time. It really made a difference.

Could possibly be "night terrors" as it's happening later in the night, too. I'd start with who is it first.

Good luck

The monsters are very real at this age. They really see them. My son never watched Scooby Doo or anything else on TV except PBS programs and he still became terrified by monsters at age 3. But I'm sure Scooby Doo would have made it even worse.

I never tried to talk him out of the monsters. Instead we had pretend bags of monster "go-away dust" that we would throw at any monsters he saw. I would even pretend to see monsters. We would get really raucous about it, shouting at them to get out, then hooting and hollering when the monsters ran away. I also started leaving a light on when he would fall asleep. His night light created too many scary shadows, but having his overhead light on a dimmer helped a lot. Eventually we started adding good monsters into the mix. They helped to chase away the bad monsters. Be patient and if he is scared don't minimize it or expect him to just tough it out. Give him a space on your floor where he can sleep if he wakes up scared but work on having him just quietly lay down there instead of waking you.

What if you had someone else that he's never met (a co-worker, etc.) that looked "official" come in and exterminate the monsters...then you're not just telling him someone came, but he's actually seeing it.
If you're teaching Christian values, we like the Veggie Tales "Where's God when I'm scared?" movie and I've also given my kids a verse to say when they're scared.

E.; yes this can be hard, and yes what they watch on tv and the games they play and how others treat them or tell them does affect them very much, its ok , most kids get scared and want mom and dad, we found ourselves in a good bedtime routine, reading a happy story , or even a bible story , and a prayer before going to be, daddy would say a prayer and pray about helping the child to sleep, and then then the child would say a prayer, this served a two fold purpose, it gave the child higher protection, the one who created all things, after all you can tell him monsters are just bad angels, any way, when our kids could not sleep in thier room, we had a mattress under our bed allready made up, and when they needed us, they were always welcomed, i would hold them for a bit, to calm them down, and then i would pull out the mattress under the bed, and let them sleep there, i could roll over and pat their little backs, this gave them the comfort they need , and the space we needed, just comfort your child and be glad you are the one whom they can run to for the comfort, one day will come where you will want to help them and they want your help, or get it elsewhere, any way , just enjoy life, and love your child, D. s

After this issue with a few foster kids we learned from a very good in-home case worker: Don't put too much emphasis on it. She said only talk about it when they bring it up.It helped to TALK about it, name it, find out as much info on where this fear is coming from. great ideas. We also had a fairly strong faith based home, so saying prayers and using the glow in the dark items they sell went well worked for one child. I also heard that they have used a monster light round battery operated push button that they can turn on if they feel fear. The one day the worker came and they drew pictures of it, then the worker talked to it and found out it had gotten accidentally stuck in our house and really wanted to get out of the house so we opened doors and windows and went from room to room. She went out to her car and opened the door and it went with her to another place and took care of the problem. The worker now and then was asked from the child how was the monster doing in his foster home?

He seems genuinely terrified because he thinks they're really real!

Try looking at it from his perspective and go from there.

My son had only been 2 yrs old for a few months when suddenly he saw a dragon in our room. (We co-sleep). I totally accepted that he saw it and asked him questions about it: what is it doing now? What does it look like? what color are it's ears? I told him mommy couldn't see it, so he would have to tell me about it. then I asked him all the questions and encouraged him to describe what he saw. As far as he is concerned, I totally believed him that there was in fact a dragon in the room. He had calmed almost all the way down when he sudden;y got frightened again, which I soothed by suggesting maybe the dragon had come to bring us flowers to smell (his favorite subject at the moment) and asked what color the flowers were and would he please ask the dragon to come closer so i could smell the flowers.

This happened exactly once. That's how I handled it and he has not seen the dragon (or any other scary thing) since then. I think it was mostly the buying into what he saw and treating it like it was real that really did the trick for us. I have a feeling if I had resisted, he would have insisted... and then we'd be where you are now :(

Might not be too late to try what I tried. Best Luck .Hugs to you all.

Oh, and I have to add one thing about Monsters Inc movie after reading the others' responses: tread there with care. Same with any monster books. Depending on your child's disposition and personality, movies and books may not be the way to go. my son was more afraid of the monster books than he was of his dragon he saw, and I know a lady who showed the movie to two kids she was babysitting and then heard nothing good from the mom later on- said the movie terrified the kids and gave them nightmares. Just a heads-up.

One thing my mother did with me when i was a child is to "catch" the monsters and throw them out. after about a week and a half of the exact same thing when i was about 4, my mom finally got up, went into the kitchen and grabbed 2 black garbage bags. She came back into my bedroom, asked me where the monsters were hiding, and then literally chased the "monsters" down. she reached under my bed, got into my closet and grabbed them, behind the dresser, wherever i said i saw the monsters, she then shoved them (yes they were invisble) into the garbage bags, tied them up extra tight, and put the (empty) bags on the curb with the trash. to be totally honest with you...it was quite fun, and i never had monsters bother me again after that. Dont know how it worked, but it did...i wasnt afraid. i think my mom scared the monsters away. hah.

Hi E.,
First of all, I am so sorry that your son is going through this and I will be interested in hearing if it resolves itself eventually or not.
I would take this very seriously. You never want your children to think that you don't believe them. I would ask lots of questions about the monsters like what do they look like, do they talk to him, what do they say, where do they live or they mean monsters, etc. etc. Get as much info as possible.
I would consider sleeping in his room on the floor with him for a few nights and see if they show up with you there. If not, then maybe he is just going through something and it will eventually pass.
I do however believe in evil spirits and do believe that they seem to pick on children who are more vulnerable. I'm not crazy either but am open to the idea that there is more out there than meets our eyes. Have you lived in your house long??
Most likely it will be nothing and it will pass in time but I think the worst thing you could do is to dismiss your sons feelings b/c to him it is very real.
So instead of inviting him into your room why don't you and your husband take turns sleeping in his room and see if they go away. I would also consider saying some blessings in his room and telling him that you believe him and that you will be there for him no matter what until they are gone.
Good luck and remember sleeping with him or letting him sleep with you in only temporary, it's not like he's still going to be asking to sleep with you when he's 18. My motto is always, "This too shall pass."

Try it again, just make a bigger deal about it. Pretend you are making a magic potion. You have to believe it really works otherwise they will not. Be sure you validate their fear and for a moment you too must believe in monsters.

Check out the link below
http://www.dailyom.com/cgi-bin/display/product.cgi?pid=756

Make a Monster's Go Away Spray
I made my own, out of lavender oil, water and a few drops of my favorite perfume. My daughter helped make it and we put it in a plain glass spritzer bottle. (Can find at Campbell's or other organic stores.) She helped me spray it every night for about two weeks and from then on, all monsters that enter her room must be nice to her and protect her.

Good Luck,
K.
Des Moines Mom

My son is 2 21/2 and we watch Monster Inc Movie. He loves it and has no problem with monster. Good luck

I've heard that even just filling a spray bottle with water and labeling it for your son could help. Let him go to the store with you to pick out a spray bottle that he would want to use and then before bed have him spray for the monsters where he believes they are... and then let him keep it by his bed for when he wakes up scared and needs to use it again.... don't know if it will work, but it's an inexpensive and environmentally friendly idea.

Does he share a room with the 5 year old? Could be the older one is 'messing with him'. I don't let my three year old watch alot of things his older brother and sister watch. They are 13 and 15. It's unfortunate that even the cartoons can be unacceptable.

I'm so happy for your wonderful family and two more on the way!! Bless your heart and your husband and babies.

Scooby Doo is probably the problem. :-) Both of my daughters started this same behavior, but told me they were afraid of Scooby Doo at the same time. I loved this show when I was little, but I guess they were too young to start watching it. I am sure he will be fine after a week or two of PBS.:)

I found a book called "Monster Socks", when our grandson was afraid of monsters at night. It came with a pair of socks that glow in the dark for "protection". It is a cute book.
The author is Renee Gille.

Hope this helps.

KimE

If your kids don't share a room, maybe it would help if they did. I rarely slept in my own room as a child for the same reasons...I would always crawl in bed with my sister, or sleep on my parents floor. Now, I have a 6 yr old boy and a 3 yr old girl who share a room...it has REALLY cut back on him wanting to sleep with us, or come in our room.(we recently moved and he used to have his own room, that he RARELY slept in)

Also, how about leaving a lamp on in his room? Not just a night light...he probably wants to be able to see things. Eventually you may be able to not turn it on...but it may take awhile. You could also try turning it off after he falls asleep. Definetly cut back on anything "scarey"... maybe read some of his favorite books before bed...tuck him in and let him know if he needs anything, he can come to you at night.

Maybe he could sleep with a flashlight next to him to use if he needs it. I think the light thing is the biggest though...I remember turning on a light in the middle of the night so I could get BACK to sleep.

It may be something that lasts for a long time, but doing things like the light, or letting him sleep with siblings, etc. will make it easier to deal with. Some kids just have this issue, and others don't. Just remember, it IS VERY real to them! Sounds like you are already trying to comfort him, so keep it up, and maybe try some of the suggestions from everyone! Good Luck and Happy Sleeping!

This is similar to other responses but at bedtime you can go on a monster hunt and get rid of any monsters in his room with him. Also our kids love christmas type lights in their room. We got some at Target the were cowboy hats. My final suggestion...At walmart you can get a glostick in the flashlight section. It looks like a glostick but turns on and off and have a fairly long life. If you gave this to him to hold at night it gives light with no shadows. He could also pretend it is a monster sword or what not.

You need monster spray! Monsters only like stinky or non-smelly rooms, so we used AIR FRESHNER or "Monster Spray" to get rid of monsters. Be sure to spray under the bed and in the closets. We even had a monster that liked to hide in shoes.

I know, it is a silly idea, but it worked for us!

We read a book called Skippy John Jones and Mummy trouble it has a little poem in there that we say everynight to our baby and when my neices and nephews are over you can change soem of the words but maybe it will work.
"No Mummys in the closet
No mummys under the bed
No mummys in the bookcase
No mummys in my head"

You can also ask him to describe the monsters to you i asked my nephew to do that about a bad dream he had then i made little jokes about it while he described like he said there were warriors chasing him and i asked him if they were riding on cats. It makes them think of something that scares them then makes it funny it takes away the scare factor. Good luck

im sure the monster spray and things of such work to some extent for people. but im kinda a snob when it comes to lieing. after all we all know there arent really monsters and it just reinforces that they are real to the child. although real in their mind they can learn to control their mind. seeing spirits is a totally different thing and should be dealt with accordingly.

my son was about 2 1/2 3 when he had the monster problem. i told him that the only monsters were the type from tv. telli monster, cookie monster etc. and we knew they were friendly. that if in his dreams he saw monsters that his mind was what made the dream and he could control his mind so he could tell the monster to go away. or maybe the monster was just really sad and lonely and needed a friend so in his dream he could make his mind ask the monster if he wanted to play and join him and his friends.

he really liked the idea that even at such a young age he had so much power over what happened in his life. fear in children, and anyone for that matter comes from not feeling like you have any control.

i only heard about the monsters a couple of more times and it was all good reports. how he would ask them to play and how much fun they had.

we had a bedtime ritual of special blanket pic of dad, family and fav babysitter, (dad traveled alot) and special stuffed toy. i would also leave lullabyes playing all night. gives the brain something to do besides dream.

We did the old put some water in a spray bottle and called it "Monster-be-Gone" or something and each night before we turned out the lights we sprayed the water around the room and declared it a monster free zone. Worked like a charm!

I think that Disney's movie 'Monsters Inc.' is a great idea. It gives the imagined monsters a personality so that they seem more like regular people than some mysterious spooky thing that we don't understand. It might be a good idea to have your little one watch it.

Not knowing a persons beliefs, this may seem a bit off the wall to you and your family. Do you believe in spirits and ghosts? This has plagued myself and my children for years. As adults many are not receptive to such things. As u grow older you just naturally block these things and become oblivious. Some do not. Children unfortunately, are not able to be so oblivious... There are good spirits as well as bad, and from the sounds of it your children have the bad in their room. If you can tell he is genuinely terrified, I am telling you that this spirit is messing with him at night.

I'm sure right now if you do believe this, that you are wondering how this came into your home. A spirit can appear out of nowhere, or attach itself to you from someone else and decide to reside with you, or move on.

The best possible thing you can do is go to your pastor or priest, and ask them for a book of blessings, have them bless a piece of chalk, and some blessed holy water. They will instruct you how to draw with the chalk above the door and windows, and say the blessings to rid the evil sprits.

Please take this into consideration..
My children and myself are not so fortunate to use this path, no matter what we do or where we live, there are always these spirits with us - good and bad.

Stay strong, good luck to you.
Chris

this may sound crazy-but he just might be seeing spirits-i had that problem as a child..i still see them-but,can deal with it now better.its a different world-and can be pretty darn scarey for a child.good luck

my grandson went thru this at about that age...altho none of us could see the monsters, they were very real to him...and telling him they didn't exist wasn't a good solution....my daughter came up with a very creative solution...first, each night my grandson would line up a grouping of his favorite little figures on the windowsill to 'guard the room'...then my daughter sprayed the room with "anti-monster spray" (air freshener with a new, handmade label on it ...a good strong scent so the smell of the air freshener lingered in the night...then if he woke up he'd smell it and know it was still "working")...she also sprayed the closet and under the bed.....then she opened the linen closet and pulled out the 'magical invisible net' and hung it around the room touching the walls at various places to attach it while they chanted magic words like 'monsters stay away!'...and 'magic net protect me while i sleep'....my grandson felt very safe and went right to sleep....

Hello,
We stumbled on a solution for our son when he was afraid to go to sleep at night. We were reading a cheesy hot wheels book that had super hot wheels that fought evil (or something corny like that) anyway, my son thought they were so cool so we bought him a couple fancy looking hot wheels and he kept them by his bed and he felt they were keeping him safe. He eventually forgot about the hot wheels (days later) and would just need some random comfort object, like his teddy bear or something.
Im not sure if that helps at all, but good luck!
B.

Have you tried watching "Monsters Inc."? Maybe when they see that by the end monsters want to make kids laugh maybe it would help. Just an FYI- if you haven't seen it, it does start out with monsters trying to scare kids. Take a look and see if you think your son would respond. Good Luck!

We are having the same problem with our 2 1/2 year old right now. I think it because of all of the Halloween decorations all over the place. We tried this: we lay him down in bed and call the monsters on the phone and tell them to please not come to our house tonight. (We actually call my parents' house and my mom or dad pretends to be the monsters.) We say that my son needs his sleep tonight and needs to have good dreams, so they need to stay away. Sometimes he talks, sometimes I talk. Either way, the monsters stay away and he can fall asleep with ease. We only had to do this a few nights in a row to ease his fears--now it is no longer an issue. Good luck!

E.,
My fraternal twins are going to be 3 next month, and they have watched Monsters, Inc. and know that there are no monsters in closets, under the bed, etc. Pre-screen that Disney one, and see if it is something that might convince your little one that monsters aren't there.
Good luck with the situation and the two little ones on the way!
J.

A friend of mine used an air freshner as a monster spray. I know it is not environmentally good but it has a strong scent. As long as the child could smell the air freshner she could sleep. My friend would purchase it at a local store and then take a piece of paper and write Monster Spray on it and cover the orginal lable with the 'new lable'. You could also get some lavender essential oil and put 2-3 drops on your child's pillow. Lavender is good for relaxation and to induce sleep.
When my daughter was in Kindergderten, now 21 yrs old, we lived in a condo that had a couple of active ghosts. One of them would wake my daughter by poking her in the back. We never made a big deal about it so she wasn't scared. But you could have an active ghost, who is disturbing his sleep. There are many people out there who expel ghosts from the home. Check around at local metaphysical or new age shops to see if they know of one. If not contact me again I can help you to expel any ghosts. You can burn sage inscense or sage leaves to quiet the ghost and get rid of any negative energies in the room.
I know this may sound way out there but remember there are ghost hunters and psychic mediums for a reason. I am a ghost hunter and psychic medium.

I have a couple of questions for you:

1. Your 5 year old isn't making the problem worse is he? I had a brother and boys tease, tease, tease.

2. I cut Scoby Doo from my daughters programming long time ago because of monsters.
Maybe if you don't let the 5 year old watch Scoby Doo, he will help with the monster problem. Older siblings can usually either be a great help or a hinderance in situations like this. Enlist his help for your sanity.

3. Does your son just want to sleep in your room? Sometimes they just want the security of having someone else around.
Can you put him in with your 5 year old? Chances are they will both sleep hard and not be bothered by all the wiggling. You could have 1 play room and one shared bedroom for the two of them until the stage is over.

My daughter loved the monster spray, we made a game of it and she started laughing. Honey, for the record I never said I believed in monsters - I just made it clear if she believed in them I would do something about it.
I said things like this spray is for the purple flowery monster, this one for the yellow sunshine monster, etc, ect until she started saying
"Monsters don't look like that"
Me: "Why not"
Her: "They're scary
Me: "Monsters are not real - they can look like anything I want them to"
and on and on

It's all perspective. If you take it with a light heart, so will your children.

Best of Luck to you,
S.

E.,

I would check if your older son has been telling him stories about monsters, etc. When my daughter was 3, almost 4, my then six year old niece told her a story about monsters coming out of the heat registers. She covered all the bases, adults couldn't see them, etc. Finally, after many nights of her sleeping on the floor in our room, she told me the story my niece had told her. I called my sister and told her the story. It was actually very creative and convincing to a three year old. My niece came over and told my daughter that she was making it up and everything was fine. Just ask your older son or your little one if they've been telling stories.

E.,

I'm upset by some of the advice you have been given. Its crazy to use monster spray or anything to scare the monsters away. The kids look to us for security and by telling them you will chase the moster away, you are telling the kids you believe there is a MONSTER! My boys had nightmares too. I put a nightlight in there room and bought them a flashlight that they could keep in bed with them. If they were afraid all they had to do was shine the light on the spot that scared them. After 2 nights, they ditched the flashnight becuase they confirmed for themselves that nothing was there. I told my kids that I loved them and that our house is safe and that they are always safe at home. Please don't confirm their imaginations and pretend to get rid of monsters. It sends mixed messages and tells your child you believe in the monsters. Please take my advice and I promise you will be sleeping sound soon. Keep a good bedtime routine and your son will be fine.

We made the HUGE mistake of letting my almost 11 year old and my four 1/2 year old go through the haunted barn tour at the apple orchard last night. Thomas, my four year old, seemed fine and they both were excited to tell us about the scary barn, but when we tried to put them to bed later, he came to us upset and scared. I went with him back to bed and told him that it was a pretend haunted house with halloween costumes and people who were just tricking him. He understands that word as he uses it all the time. He'll tease his younger sister about throwing away her blanket and she'll cry, and when I confront him to stop he says, "I was just tricking her". He seemed to calm down very well and went to bed. 1/2 hour later he came to our room and said he could hear someone coming up the stairs from our basement. My husband calmed him down and told him that we were here and that we would keep him safe and then took him back to bed. He slpet in his own bed until about 4am and then came up and laid on the floor with his blanket and pillow next to my husband for the remainder of the night.
Just keep talking to your son and reassuring him that everything is ok. Kids get exposed to so many things we can not always control and somethings we probably did not make the best judgements on, but I think it is all a learning process they all go through. Just knowing that they are loved and safe is all they need to hear at this young an age. 4 boys and a girl, wow! Will she ever be a tomboy! Congrats on your wonderful family!