Help with Visitation.

JOURNAL, JOURNAL, JOURNAL, this is a pain in the butt to keep up with but I swear to you comming from a mom who knows you HAVE to keep EVERYthing you do, say ,situations that happen no matter whether it's a good situation, bad or, indifferent! He is at a disadvantage right off the start in the courts eyes and your job is to change their minds and keeping a journal shows involvement, concern and, the truth! If she is breaching a contract set up by the court she will be held in contempt this is serious but if you simply sit on the side lines and let the court have their way your gonna be short changed everytime!

My Ex sister in law is doing the very same thing to my brother who at one time actually had custody of there son they have gone back and forth since they split several years ago theres a big age difference though my brothers kid is 11 now has a somewhat option of his own. My brother has let his son decide how much or how little he sees of him and our whole familt thinks thats just wrong. He hasn't seen him since Christmas I totally beleave it has to do with the new G/F. I would tell your hubby to step up and fight for his daughter she deserves to know her dad even if her mom thinks other wise. Later she will thank him for being in her life.

well this case is simular to mine but not all the way. I was in the army an i was stationed over seas that is where mine is dif from yours but other than that what you can do is call the cops and have a report written up each time she does not allow you to pick the child up on your scheduled visits I know this sounds bad but if you do end up going head first into a court battle and from my point of veiw that is about to happen just from what I have read here you need a paper trail saying that she has denied the right of the father to visit with the child. I am sorry to say this but it may take a couple of times for her to uphold the visitation right and it is a right to see your child not something she can just say no to a judge says yes and until that judge says no you can see her. If you can talk to her without her getting pissy you might want to explain to her that her not letting him see the child can cause her to loose her rights to the child if she continues to ignore the judgs discission. I hope the 2 can get together and work out their differences for the sake of the child because she will be in the middle of all of this. I am saying this from my experiences with my x because he has done the same to me but the judge has ruled in my favor now and the custody has been reversed to me. and it gets nasty when a child is envolved try to shelter her from as much as possible while this is going on. I hope this is helpful to you and good luck try to talk first then if she continues call the police while at her house do not wait until you leave cause that will do no good.

I do not know what you can do but work with your lawyer. He will know what channels to follow. Just remember to be strong and all will work out. His ex is hurting herself. We deal with this with my husband's ex and my stepdaughter is starting to realise what is going on. Just remember she does not have to like you. You are not her wife. It is a lot of work and stressful. Don't let it get to you too bad. I have had to learn to deal with it. It can cause problems in your marriage with too much stress so sit back and take a deep breath. I know I am not much help. sorry. Just wanted to let you know you are not alone.

I wonder, have they thought about seeing a mediator? I know it sounds like a bad relationship and it very well may not work; but at least each parent would get some idea of where the other one it coming from. I have a sneaking suspicion that the mother isn't trying to be a pain, but simply wants to make sure her child isn't going to be hurt in the process. The father just wants to make things right- but they both sound a little stubborn and may not listen to each other right off the bat. I would also be very careful as the new wife. It is happening to you too, and you want to be supportive, but be careful of where you sit on this- you don't want to be completely in the middle of things. If you play it right, you may end up with the mother trusting you a little more than her ex- believe me- both of my parents have been married many times. I understand this process. Good luck.

Hi J.,
First of all, document EVERYTHING. The calls and what is said when his ex doesn't stick to the visitation schedule. If the courts has required visitation, she is going against the law. Call the court and complain and ask them what you can do to see your daughter on a regular basis.

I went thru the "ex/stepdaughter/visitation" thing 11 years ago. My stepdaughter is now 16 and we still have problems with the mother. We had a great arrangement when she was younger. We had her every weekend. We would pick her up from daycare/school on Friday and take her back to daycare/school on Monday. She had clothes that remained at our house at all times. Therefore, the mom didn't have the excuse that she didn't have time to get her ready. If this isn't possible, there could be a court appointed mediator or family member where she is dropped off and picked up.

I hope this is helpful.
D.

I hope this is helpful

It's only going to work if they both sit down like adults and with their own feelings aside and think of what and only what is best for this little girl. Being kept from either parent is not doing anything but hurting the child, and all b/c the 2 of them can't grow up and act like adults for the sake of the child. The end results if it continues like this is the little girl is going to resent 1 or both parents in the end for not allowing her to develop her own relationship with the other parent.Sounds like their both using the child as leverage in an argument, more her than him but regardless. If my husband and I were to ever part I would in no way no matter the reason for the divorce would I intentionally hurt my children just to hurt my husband. My children love their dad as much as they love me and it's just sick to use childrens feelings to dictate another person. Tell them they both need to grow up, if not for their own sake...atleast for this little girl who is caught in the middle and never asked to be.Studies show that it's best for any child to grow up in a 2 parent home or atleast have the 2 parents available.Everything about this situation is bad and the only person that it's going to be affecting long term is that little girl....if that's not a reason to grow up then that little girl is best off without either parent.