Help with Fertility Questions.

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Likely stress and trying too hard is the problem - I really don't think food choices would have that great of an impact on fertility. Also, do you have family in the area? While it may seem economical to have a baby while your husband is gone, I personally couldn't fathom making a conscious decision to have a child when the father couldn't be there for the birth and during the early days. And, without family support, the early days would be extremely difficult.

I would think you are WAY too young and haven't tried nearly long enough to consider in vitro - also keep in mind the potential for multiple births when you take that route. Also, considering you didn't want children in the past, how do you think you would handle being a single mother for 9 months? Kids are a wonderful blessing and IMHO there is no greater joy in this world than holding your newborn child in your arms, but reality will hit very soon thereafter and your life will never be the same again - for better in some regards and for worse in others - my quality of sleep has not been the same since my first child was born over 16 years ago. And, the amount of quiet time I get is minimal - having a newborn with no father around will likely mean that you get no quiet time.

And, yes, I know i didn't answer your direct question, but my advice is to keep yourself busy while your husband's gone taking classes or something and then relax and take your time starting your family when he gets back, so he can be a part of it.

My husband and I tried for years. We adopted our little girl in Sept 2007. We both started taking iodine (JCrow brand) in January and we found out that we will be parents again in November this year. We were told that we would have to take all types of hormones if we wanted to have our own, we did not want to do that so we adopted. If you read about iodine you will find out that it controls all your hormones in your body. We really think that is what happened because that is the only thing that we did different. Although we were not taking it for that reason, we were taking it for all the other benefits. I would start with that and I know that a doctor will not do the in-vitro if there is not something that they can tell is wrong or if you have been trying for a number of years. I would relax.

Talk with your doctor about getting a dye test...they put dye in your uteris and then it shows if your tubes are open. I did this and mine were open for the test.

BUT, after a year of still not being able to get pregnant and doing 2 rounds of Clomid w/ IUI's and 2 rounds of injectibles w/ IUI's, I had exploratory surgery to see what is going on. I had endometriosis (never knew I had before) and one of my tubes had blocked in that year. So, he cleared everything out, I did 1 more round of shots with IUI and we got pregnant.

First talk with your Doctor about the dye test...that's the best starting place.

When my good friend was trying for their 2nd, her doctor said that you have the highest chance of getting pregnant the 13, 14, and 15th days after the first day of your period. Also, relax. Don't make it such a "chore," make love. :) Good luck to you both and for his safe return!

Personally I see nothing wrong with trying for a baby before he goes. And that therein is potentially the problem. You guys are "trying" so hard that you are tying too hard. I know it is hard to relax about it and let it come naturally because in the back of your mind is the fact that "we have to hurry, you are leaving". You do have time. Slow down, enjoy each other's company, maybe try a romantic weekend somewhere so you can just relax and enjoy each other's company without worrying so much about "gotta get pregnant". Besides a nice weekend alone would be a special time for you before he goes. I am former military and know that you will have a great support system even if he is away at the time. With video camera's etc he too can be involved in the birth. Good luck to you both.

I don't have any advice on the fertility problem except maybe with the stress of knowing he's going away that's whats hindering it. I am an active duty Navy wife (husband has been in for 13 years) and my advice to you is wait until he returns from Iraq. He will miss a lot. The baby would be almost a year old when he returns and it will be hard on you having a baby with no support from your hubby. My husband was on 6 month deployment when our daughter was born almost 10 years ago and he missed the first 3 months of her life which he regrets not being able to be there when she was born or to help out with feedings or changings or to hold her. I know that is probably not the advice you want to hear, but it's something you should consider. Whatever you decide I wish you luck & a safe return of your hubby.

I agree with the ladies who suggested Taking Charge of Your Fertility. My hairdresser told me about it after her daughter and three of her friends got pregnant within a couple of months after reading it. I read it and my daugher will be 2 in July. I'm grateful to you and your family for your service to our country. Best of luck!

Relax. Don't try so hard. It will happen.

Hello!

The best advice I was given is try not to think about it too much - easier said than done! When I was working and traveling a bunch we were trying to get pregnant with our second child. I started taking ovulation predictor tests (available in most drug stores) and it worked for us. The test tells you when you are ovulating and helps you determine the best time for intercourse. Yes, takes out the spontaneity of it, but when you are crunched for time and with him leaving soon this is your best option. It also took me about 4-6 months before I become pregnant with both of mine so you are well within the norm. Best of luck!

We tried for a year with #2. My hormones were not balanced, and I wasn't ovulating. I wanted to try everything natural, and the last thing before going to meds actually worked. I went to the chiropractor and told him exactly why I was going for, and he focused on those areas in my spine. I ovulated 2 weeks later and got pregnant! I doubt anyone would consider you for in vitro since you haven't been trying long. I do understand your situation, but it usually takes a while to get pregnant for most women. Don't stress about it because it will make it worse. Also, do ou really want to have a baby when he won't be here? He would miss out on the birth of his baby and a lot of the beginning stuff. Just leave it in God's hands and see what happens. Maybe you'll get pregnant before he leaves. If not, it could be a good thing and you can wait until he gets back and can be a part of everything.

Hi,
I would recommend that you read Taking Charge of Your Fertility. Excellent book. It would help you identify when your best time to conceive would be.

This may sound crazy, but it worked for a friend at work, and I didn't see anyone post it here yet. A nurse suggested Robitussin to my coworker. She took it at night before bed - the idea being that it thins the mucus in your nose and chest, and it will thin the "mucus" other places as well. It may have been a fluke, but it's a pretty inexpensive thing to try for a week. Good luck!

My husband and I tried for 2 years until I finally went and bought a ovulation kit from the store. After using it, I got pregnant! It turned out that it was just timing.

I personally would not want to be pregnant while my husband was gone though. I would want to share the whole experience with him. I couldn't imagine going through the pregnancy & birth without my significant other to share that joy.

With my first child, we tried for almost a year before becoming pregnant. My hormones weren't balanced and I don't think I was ovulating--I lost 20 pounds and two months later we were pregnant. You may not have a weight issue at all, but I'd thought I'd throw it out there. Even so, a healthly diet and exercise definately cannot hurt!! Also, my friend did acupuncture after several months of trying with no success, and one month later she was pregnant. Good luck to your family and wishing a safe return for your husband.

A., I think you should read a book called TAKING CHARGE OF YOUR FERTILITY. I also, had trouble conceiving and started working with my OB/GYN by charting everything. We were on our 6 month of tracking when I finally got pregnant. Reading this book didn't make all my dreams come true....it helped me learn about my body and what goes on during your menstrual cycle. Also, I truly believe that any type of stress (worrying, not eating, etc.) will make your cycle out of sync. I finally stopped worrying and decided if I was going to need fertility help, I would get it. I ended up pregnant with identical twins --- prior to any type of treatment. I have 5 children now under the age of 7. I will tell you it is a blessing and more work than I could have ever imagined. Trust that God (or whoever you believe in) has a plan for you & your husband. Enjoy the time you have together...and, read this book. I hope your dreams come true!
D.

Rest assured that you are not wrong in wanting to become pregnant before your husband leaves and that decision is between only you and him. No one else matters :)
Now, I don't know that this method is proven, but ........everytime that I started working out to lose unwanted pregnancy weight I always ended up getting pregnant again. Seems like when I start trying to eat right and get into shape my body decides it might be a good time to support a pregnancy. Maybe that will work for you. Eat healthy, get on a eating schedule, and work out. I would probably do cardio workouts like videos and treadmill. Other than that, just get him to fulfill his part of the process and pray pray pray. If it is meant to happen it will. Don't get anxious about it, just relax and let things happen.

Hi A., the only thing I can tell you is to relax and try not to think of it. I know it is very hard to understand that. With my son, my husband and I tried for two months with me checking the dates of ovulation and making sure we were doing it the right time. Well, he told me the following month that he wanted to take a break and I was good with that. Well, out of the blue the following month we were not careful and the first time without protection it happened. I know it was because I was not stressing myself out anymore. Have you tried to look around on BabyCenter. There are a lot of women on the website trying to get pregnant and share their secrets. Good luck to you and keep us posted! :)

I've been there. We started trying when I was 27 and after almost a year of nothing on our own, we sought our OB's advice. We tried a few things with him (mostly variations on medically inducing menstrual cycles, which was where my "stuff" wasn't working), and they didn't work, as I still wasn't ovluating. He referred us to a clinic. After a few procedures, a surgery, and one cycle of injections +IUI, we conceived our boys. They were born just after I turned 30. SO it took several years but it was worth it.
My insurance covered NOTHING!!!! Do what you can to avoid the invasive stuff. The agony of going through these treatments is a lot to handle, especially with a hubby overseas. For many women, oral hormonal techniques work immediately.

Also I just read the "stay away from the Doody office..." that's where we were and we couldn't have been happier. We didn't see Dr Kevin or Kathy DOody, but Dr. Rehman (who is no longer there) and Dr. Nackley did my HSG. Loved them both.

Go get the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Dr. Toni Weschler. It will help you understand what is going on with your cycles and when you are most fertile. Most doctors will not send you to a fertility specialist until you have tried for 6 months or more or you have had successive miscarriages. Still, if you do want to go to a fertility dr, I LOVE mine.

Dr. James Douglas
http://www.ivfplano.com/

I have had one successful pregnancy with Dr. Douglas. We did not have to do IVF. He was able to pinpoint my issues and got me pregnant in 3 months when I had been trying for 10 years and had been with Dr. Doody before. I recommend staying away from the Doody office!

GL and God bless!