My brother and his girlfriend have both been in trouble, and we foresee more coming. Their two children have been taken away once, and, I feel it could happen again. I want to foster my nephew - how can I convince my husband?
are their two siblings? i only ask b/c wouldn't it be sad to separate them? what are the circumstances around that?
You shouldn't have to convince him. This is family we take care of family. No ifs -- ands or buts.
These are innocent children in need of love and care.
Just tell him you would always regret not helping the children at their most desperate need of help.. I agree, you should foster both..
Please do not pick one over the other. Especially if the care they are in now they are together. Just too heartbreaking..
Call your local foster care agency and get the information you need, do it now because it takes awhile to get your license. Just be prepared everyone I know who did this for a family member got blamed for 'stealing their kids away' people seem to.forget they were removed by the state. GL
I am sorry you all are going through this. I would just tell him that is what family does. If he disagrees, I would tell him that it would break your heart to see them go into foster care and you aren't going to do that. Good luck!
T.,
I do not believe its a matter of convincing your husband,Im not saying you have not givin it enough thought,but it would change your whole family dynamic.Financially,emotionally,room in your home,the way your children adjust to it,the way your nephew adjusts,if he does(i do not know his age)not to mention your brother and his girlfriend being in your life(in a different way)Your reaction right now may be(forget our feelings,what about what the children are going through?)Yes,but your husband is reluctant and for a very good reason.Court hearings,children and youth,counseling(for everyone!)God bless people that adopt children,God bless you for wanting to step in like that,just see things from his side too.I am completely aware that your nephew cannot take care of himself and may be going through ALOT,but you have to think of your family as well,they have to come first.Good luck to you and your husband and I truly hope no matter how things pan out,its for the good of all of you.(just my opinion mind you)hope it helps :)
If they have two children I would take both, it wouldn't be fair to separate them. Foster care is so difficult for children. It would be so unfair to give one a stable home and not the other. Foster families can be good and loving but the kids can be moved for any number of reasons and their life is so unstable, and many foster families do it for the extra cash and don't care for the kids, as long as they provide the basics they can get away with it. I would never allow a family member to be put in foster care. Family is family no matter what. Search for the facts on kids in foster care and show that to hubby to convince him. Get certified now, in case it does happen again. Sounds like you are pretty sure it will, so start the process now. If they never get taken again then at least you were prepared if they did, and if they do you will be ready to help when needed. Do everything to convince hubby since these are kids lives. If you can provide a loving home do it. I am a single Mom with two kids and very little help, and no monetary support. Yet I would take any family member in, without question. We would make it work because that is what family does, if you can't rely on your family, well who can you? You want these kids to grow up knowing they can trust in people, and if they are sent off to foster care, they will learn there is no consistency in the world, there is no safe place, etc. And they will learn not to trust. It is a sad life. Look up the stats and take that to hubby if you have to.
