Have You Ever Wanted to Schedule Sex?

I don't think I would.
If it works for you, great.
It's something I, personally, am not interested in doing.

you betcha.
when i was a randy young thang i'd have abhorred the notion. i was all about spontaneity and would have considered a schedule too restricting. and i've heard that couples who are trying to conceive and 'have' to have sex when the physical indicators say to do so get pretty blahed out.
but there are definite advantages.
anticipation is delicious.
and very very helpful for folks whose libido has tanked for some reason. mine was menopause. while we were never organized enough to try a schedule, i found that if he *surprised* me with his dratted male urge, i felt peeved and put upon. and i never ever want him to feel as if i don't want him (cuz he's wonderful.) but planning not only gave me time to get mentally ready, it meant that i let HIM know what was coming, so the onus of being the initiator wasn't always on him. it was a very cool way to overcome, at least to some degree, that sadly zing-free several years.
(good news to you gals who are facing that, it DOES come back. different, but good again!)
i totally agree with you about the opportunity to tease and tantalize.
:) khairete
S.

We don't really schedule, but since my libido is lower than his and we have a kid, we very loosely schedule by making sure it happens on the weekends and at least once during the week. I don't know if that counts we scheduling, but it works.

I think that as long as you keep the romance spiced up, there isn't a problem. People schedule everything else in life, why not sex. It is an important part of a healthy marriage.

I haven't, but I am considering it since it seems to get put on the back burner sometimes. If I had my way, it would be daily. Will have to see if my hubby is up for that :)

When my kids were small and all the parenting books suggested scheduling intimacy, I found it ridiculous. Sure, you plan for X night, but then you unexpectedly end up with a puking kid or my husband's commute doubled due to an accident/traffic or one or the other was just tired from our day at work and the demands of the little ones at home. Have time to tease each other through the day? We didn't have that kind of free time. We were at work, doing our jobs, not calling and emailing each other. I'm glad that you and hubby are having fun, but this definitely wouldn't have been my thing. When we had little ones, spontaneity was the key. Both kids were on playdates and we found ourselves home alone = YAHOO! Baby woke us both up in the middle of the night, now baby is asleep and we're wide awake = sex time!

No. Not because I think it's a bad idea, per se, it's just not how my husband and I are. He's a guy whose life is incredibly scheduled during his workday, so that would likely just seem like it would to me--an obligation. We do better living that part of our life spontaneously and so far, it's working out fine.

Kudos to Suz for pointing out those phases in our life, the ups and downs. Good words of wisdom!

Wouldn't work for us because my hubby equates schedules with pressure, and tries too hard to make everything perfect, which then messes things up for him. (Yes, we've tried it.) But if it works for y'all, don't let other people's comments discourage you - instead, rejoice in the fact that scheduling DOES work. Bravo! Have fun and enjoy each other.

For us, the key to that kind of fun seems to be all about grabbing opportunities when they come. We've turned "the quickie" into an art form. :-)

i have never set a concrete routine...we haven't ever been that deprived that we went that far lol. but i have planned to do it on x night, and it was fun! we both knew it was coming and looked forward to it. i don't think you're crazy! but i would say that scheduling EVERY single time, for infinity, might get a little stale...i would hope that as your relationship improves with this method, you would find times to also do it on an impromptu basis, too, right? so then the need for a strict routine would lessen. and also, i think each couple is different. hubby and i are quite happy with 2-3 times per week. 4x, to me, seems a bit militant, to "have" to do it, regardless of mood or energy level. but obviously - it's working for you. good job!

No.
I won't if I'm not in the mood, and I wouldn't expect him to if he wasn't. Going through the motions hoping that maybe it will turn into the real thing just doesn't work for me.

I think that couples should do what works for them. This never would have worked for us.

Have I ever wanted to schedule sex? No. Not necessary in my marriage.

Would I do it? Maybe.

If it works for the schedulers then there obviously isn't any harm.

I do not think I would like it. I don't think I would become giddy with excitement. Especially if it was scheduled down to the hour. As in, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 9PM we will have sex.

I asked my husband how he feels about scheduled sex and he said "I don't know about that." Which basically means he does not like the idea at all.

My question for those who schedule sex is what if you feel like having sex on one of the "off" days? Do you make the attempt or is it an automatic no go, don't even bother suggesting it because your partner has Tuesdays off. That would possibly cause some marital strife (at least in my relationship).