Have I Outgrown My Best Friend?

I have realized over the past several years that just because I have been friends with someone since high school, does not mean that I have to continue being friends with them. As people grow and experience different things they change. We are not the same people that we were in high school, or even a few years ago. There are people who you can grow with, and some you can't. If this person is not a positive influence in your life, then there is no harm with letting is fizzle out. Life is too short to spend it with people who bring you down.

Instead of fighting, maybe you can just tell her that you're sorry about her not being able to have kids, and that she's breaking your heart by being so judgemental because it touches on your life. If she's really your best friend, she'll stop. It's sad that she's hurting, but she's hurting you with her pain and she needs to stop.

Does it feel like her comments about other mothers are really about you?
Does it feel like she puts you down
because you don't have a car or a job like hers?
When you "make your point", and then feel like you need to apologize . . .
does she ever feel like apologizing afther she "makes her point"?
If you feel very strongly about keeping this friend,
I wonder if the two of you could agree
never to bring up certain touchy topics.
Can the two of you enjoy chatting w/one another
on various topics other than the "hot button" items?
Do you have anything in common these days . . .
or was the best, closest connection you had many years ago?
Sorry I don't have any advice . . . . only these questions,
which may help you answer your question for yourself.

Sometimes your relationship with people goes through certain permutations as life goes on and you have different life experiences. Maybe at this point in time, she's on a different path than you are. And the two of you are probably both still pretty young still and, with that comes a sense of feeling as if you know it all when, really you don't (arrogance, judgment). It maybe time now for the two of you to be friends but not be as close as you once were. Who knows, maybe your friend will end up getting pregnant so that she can share that experience with you, or she'll get older and wiser, and hopefully will learn at some point that not everything is always so black and white. At that point, the two of you may feel more of a connection than you do right now.

Just something for you to consider....

It's worth attempting to have a "clear the air" conversation. Write down what you want to say, practice it a lot, and make a date with her when you can really concentrate on each other. Start by talking about how much she means to you, how much you value her friendship, and it's because of that that you'd like to address some ongoing issues to move forward together. Use the "I" language, so that you are talking about how you feel (lonely, sad, distant, hurt, disappointed, whatever it is) and not using accusatory words. "I am concerned that... it feels like... I wonder if..." Gentle words that describe your feelings, suggest the issue at hand, and leave it open for her to respond. Be very very open about what she has to say (there may be hurtful things there, like jealousy) and really listen. If she's willing to listen to you as well, have an open conversation about your feelings, then you can repair this and move forward. Honestly though, if you try to have a real talk about things and it's met with defensiveness or if she dismisses you, then it might be time to move on without her.
Good luck, be brave!

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I think it's time to "be honest" and stop trying to make YOUR point. I was 39 before I had my first (and only) baby and BOY does your tune change when you have a kid---it's not as simple as she might think. Keep yourself focused on your priorities and she can stay focused on hers.
You don't need to lose your friend. You two might have to just agree to disagree. Maybe if you confess that you envy certain aspects of her life (nice car, good job, freedom) she might just confess that she envies your life as well.
I have a friend I've had since birth, she just recently got married (in her 40's) and our lives are light years apart (she flies to Vegas just to get her hair cut!) but we are best friends and probably always be, but we've had many, many different paths in our lives.

Think of one of the worst things that could happen to you, and then realize it happened to your friend, of course she is going to be jealous and bitter that she cannot have children. You would be too. Of course she has more material things than you because she is not raising children. I know it can be annoying, but if you are her best friend than hopefully you can be understanding. When she talks about other people, shes not meaning it towards you, shes just venting and as her BF she probably just thinks you will understand.

Hi, we have an older friend who had a hysterectomy when she was 20ish. She has always said I don't like kids, I'm glad they're yours and not mine, not in a negative tone. Just saying that it's beyond her. I don't believe it. I feel its her way of dealing w/ the fact that her best friends had kids and are know having grand kids. It had to be hard for her. Maybe your friend isn't dealing w/ her feelings. How hard is it for her if she wanted kids and never dealt w/ the fact that she can't??? That's a pretty big...callous to build so she can be around you and your kids.
Lay it all out on the table out of love.
You guys are really close it might be a little rocky once all the feelings are out but you'll get through it.

i literally just posted something similar! my bff of 5 yrs and i had a huge blow out and it hurts. we haven't spoken in 6 months and it sucks. but at the same time- im much better off. theres no snide comments, no competition, and no silly fighting. it sounds like you and your friend are in 2 different spots. maybe its time to move on. sorry- i know this sucks :/