My husband and I were thinking about doing the gold star reward. Our daughter is almost 2 and if she does something really good like clean her room when we ask we give her a gold star plus positive reenforcement. After she gets a good number of them she gets a special treat...like a day out by herself with mommy or daddy or something like that. Does anyone do this or what do you recommend. Please let me know if this works. How many stars should she get before she gets the special treat?
After a lot of talking my husband and I decided to go ahead and do the star reward. We started it the other day and she has actually caught on very well. She gets excited to put the stars on the board. We set her number low and put some rules. She has to have 10 stars to get her "special treat" but if she has more "no no stars" than good stars then she doesn't get the special treat. If she decides to get a new toy she has to get rid of an old one and we'll take it to goodwill. Her treat could range from a new toy, stay up an extra 30 minutes before bed, day out with mommy or daddy, or a night over at one of the granparents. I thank everyone for their suggestions they were a great help.
I think it's a great idea, we always started the "treat" idea but were never ablet o be consistant with it, I think if you can be consistant with it then go for it, I'd say to start with, since she is 2 go for a week then as she gets older then extend the time frame.
Hi B.,
I have done this for years with my older two boys. We call it the 'Star Behavior Chart" and they love it. They first began 'competing' with each to see who I would notice first having good behavior. It's been used in a variety of ways...good behavior in the grocery store, helping around the house, doing things without being asked, or specific chores. Some things they have to do just to live here (as Dave Ramsey of Financial Peace says). As they have gotten older they enjoy making their own charts on an excel spreadsheet. They put their 'wish list' items on the left of the page and spaces for stars to the right. It takes 20 - 30 stars for items, such as a new game boy game, having a friend over, a $20 shopping spree at WalMart or Toys R Us. I also take stars away for unbecoming behavior. So, it's not just 'easy street' to get what they want. It has taught them to set goals (sleepover, game, trip to Chuck E. Cheese's) and work towards achieving their goals and that hard work is rewarded. And, I'm not constantly handing out money. They earn credits towards their goals. I let them choose where to place their stars. I have also toyed with a salary plus commision idea when they get older and money becomes more of a desirable thing to them. They get a 'salary' for doing the basics...making their beds, keeping clothes picked up, bathrooms neat, toys off the floor. They get commission for 'extra' work, like...washing mom's car!
Good luck and have fun with whatever you choose!
B.,
You might want to check out www.housefairy.org for great ideas and a fun way to teach kids responsibility and cleaning their rooms.
Blessings,
T. Walker
www.MomRN.com
Two seems young to me. You might wait until she is a little older. Of course, you can try it and see if it works for you. Good luck.
My mom does this for my niece... she gets blue stickers for not listening and yellow for good behavior and red for doing her chores... she has to have 95% of yellow and red for the MONTH and she gets ONE item that she has been wanting, like a new dvd usually or an extra week of ballet class or something like that. She's been doing this with her since she was 3 I think and each month they go through her clothes and toys and take what she doesn't want or play with to Goodwill. We took her for Shrek 3 when she came to visit as her reward for April. Sometimes she'll say she'll wait and then 2 mths will go by and she'll get one thing instead of 2, like during school she stayed in cheerleading and dance and gymnastics and didn't get anything... she's almost 7 and she's got lots of "issues" and this works for her and keeps her in check and out of trouble most of the time b/c she knows if she has a lotof blue stickers she'll be in HUGE trouble by my dad at the end of each week. they also put money in her savings account for every yellow and red sticker she gets, i think its $1 or $2 per sticker.
Hi B.,
We do this with our 4 year old. It works wonderfully, just don't forget to continue to do it! If I'm out of posterboard and forget to make a new chart right away, my daughters attitude is completely different. It's "NO mommy, I don't want too!!!" When I keep the chart Bekah does SO much better helping and she feels so good when rewarded. (I put up a cork board on the back of her bedroom door to display the stars).
After she collects 10 stars she is allowed to use some of her piggybank money and get a "my little pony".
I guess she is "earning back" her pocket money, but I want her to know she can't just have what she wants, she has to earn it by doing small jobs. I'm also starting her early on the value of money, so HOPEFULLY, when she's older she realises money does not grow on trees.
Anyway, good luck, I congratulate you for starting early. There are tones of little jobs a 2 year old can do, and they love to help!
Hi B., In my opinion if you reward her for something that later on when she gets bigger will be her responsibility than your stakes will only get higher as you go on. Pretty soon it will be a $50 pair of shoes when she is 12 and so on.
In my opinion picking up your room is part of your job as a child the saying in my house goes "if you are big enough to get it out, you are big enough to put it away. "If you don't want to put it away don't drag it out".
I have 4 children, 1 husband and a dog, we all have to pull our own weight around our house to keep things going, to keep it clean. On saturday we are having a BBQ for fathers day and family is coming over it will be a group effort to clean the house, pick up the yard, and mow the grass. I understand she is only 2 but it starts now and if you reward now you will have to reward later. Just my opinion. W.
