Gift Opening Etiquette... - Marion,IA

I don't think there's a right or wrong answer for the age level you're talking about. 4 and 5 year olds can probably handle sitting and watching gift opening much better than 2 and 3 year olds. I think people need to relax a little about all the "right" way to do things, if the kids sit and watch great...no sense in forcing it now, just set the example and they'll get it when they're old enough to really understand.

i personally find it mind-numbingly stultifying to sit and watch someone else open presents while everyone else is expected to sit and oooh and ahhh obediently. i am always so very grateful for recipients who open the gifts in private and sent nice thank you notes.
i'd say leave it up to the kids. if they want to watch their present being opened, well, i can understand that. but making kids stop playing to go dutifully gawp at the loot pile......well, i'm with the kids who want to keep playing!
khairete
S.

I think the attention is supposed to be on the kiddo celebrating the birthday, so I always had my kids watch. It's tough when they are little, but it's courteous.

I would have my child come watch, but if it was my daughter, I would not be offended if all of the other children did not come watch, especially if they are younger, and they don't want to. No point in the parents struggling to get them to sit.

I do think presents should be opened during the party. People want to see the child open their gift. that's part of the joy of giving...seeing the person enjoy it. I do not like when parents let older siblings rip open all the presents. if the birthday child is too young, then the parent should help.

Whatever your kid wants to do is what's best. Some will sit, some will not. Some will want to take the gifts for themselves, some are old enough to have the restraint. It's whatever each kid is able to do.

If my kids are really into the playing I leave them alone. No one wants to have the distraction of my kids wiggling and complaining that they want to go play. Now I do tell them we are opening gifts, sometimes they want to watch so they go.

I think either is fine. I announce when mine are going to open gifts so those that want to watch can. I don't expect all the kids to stop playing to come watch and if the alternative is that they are going to gather so closely (as kids do) and prevent me from taking pictures or interfere with the birthday child opening their gifts, I would actually prefer that they don't come watch. Especially with kids this young, they don't tend to respect the request of staying back or not to open the gifts.

We always have everyone gather around to watch, but then we never have more than 5 or so gifts anyway, so it doesn't take long (for those who are attention-challenged). It's nice for the giver to see the joy their gift brings and to get a thank you right on the spot. For those givers who really can't sit through it and continue playing, I don't mind, but I do make my child give them a thank-you-shout.

I don't really like it when the presents are not opened at the party. I like to see the smile when our gift is opened. And those times when they were just taken home to open later, I never got any kind of acknowledgement that they even got our gift. No verbal or written thank you at all, or even a mention that so-and-so liked the ____, and we didn't even see any of the presents at their house when we went to play. Even if you don't like the gift, at least show some some acknowledgement for the sake of the givers nice thought! But I guess "thank yous" are a different topic altogether.

i have my kids watch, I think it's the polite thing to do. But i do understand that large parties with 2 year old children can be overwhelming.

personally i don't love when people take the gifts home to open, I went to an effort to get somethign they woud like and want to see them open it and say thank you. What's next not servign cake because the kids would rather play??

I wish people would follow the rule that one guest per age of the child.

I let my kids play and sometimes even encourage them to. If they watch the present opening they get upset that they can't participate. My oldest wants to open something and my youngest just gets in the way of pictures.

We don't open the presents at our kids bday parties

We never open presents at our birthday parties and the ones my children have been to, those hosts don't open presents either. They do it after the guests have left.

Mom of three - 6.5yo, 3.5yo, 2.5yo

We used to open the gifts at the birthday party with all of the other children ( and miscellaneous adults) gathered around them. At my eldest daughter's 5th birthday party, I had a sort of epiphany; my daughter didn't really need or even WANT most of the stuff she was opening. Between us, my parents, sister and brother-in-law, and in-laws, my daughter would get all of the 'stuff' she really wanted. At that point, we decided that from then on we would request 'no gifts, please' on the kids' birthday invitations. We sometimes say that if the guests want to bring something, they can bring cans for the local food pantry or school supplies for the homeless shelter. It has been wonderful! Several of her friends' families have started to do the same.

Daughters 7.5 and 5.5 yrs.

Depends on your child. If you have one that will attentively sit by and watch, great. If you have one that will get distracted and disrupt the ritual it's probably best to leave the sleeping dog lie.

We play it by ear. Sometimes, my birthday boy is in good spirits and wants to open presents and there is time and space to do so (if we have the party at home we usually open gifts during the party but in a birthday party factory, we usually take them home due to time and space constraints). Sometimes the party-goers are really excited to have him open their present and wait around excitedly while this happens, and other kids might be restless, otherwise engaged, or in the "but I want the presents!" mood and parents have to distract them and that's OK too. And still other times my birthday boy will be fast approaching a total meltdown from being tired and overwhelmed and over stimulated, so gift opening looms like a disaster and we give out goody bags and send people on their way quickly.

With my sons I've been on both the host and guest side of all of these scenarios. Whatever keeps the relative peace at this age is fine - as the kids get older and have smaller parties with more intimate friends, then gift-opening is a big deal and anticipated by all but this was probably when my oldest kids hit age 10.

They all need to do the same thing. The parent having the party needs to say,ok it is time for everyone to stand around while so and so is opening their gifts. The parents should reinforce it. I think all the kids need to be doing the same thing. I think it is rude that they let their kids play while the other kids are standing around while the birthday kid is opening their presents.

Technically everyone is supposed to gather around and the bday child opens presents. I personally would kinda expect it but not care if some kids couldn't stop playing to come over to the present gathering. If parents were encouraging them not to care and keep playing that'd peeve me a little (but I also understand that that parent knows what their child is capable of doing if they do go over to "watch"), but if the kids couldn't pull away from playing that wouldn't bother me at all. Last year my daughter turned 2 and her little cousin was 15 months old and was obviously not into just sitting, so I had her help open them lol. She just liked playing with the paper. Bigger kids (2-4ish) may not be able to do that because they will then think it's their toy, but with her she just like playing with the paper lol and my daughter didn't mind at all.

I always thought everyone should sit and watch the gift opening, but some kids are too young to sit and watch and then there are the ones who cant stand to not be the one opening gifts, and its a hassle and maybe its best to let kids go play if someone is paying attention to them. I just know now that I am a grama, it really bugs me when the kids all crowd in too close and then I cant get a good photo of my little one opening her gifts. I have thought it would be a great idea to put her in a chair on the table with all the guests standing on the floor around the table looking up at her! I think thats where the phrase "putting her on a pedistal" may have come from,,lol