Proper Etiquette for Opening Presents

Ugh. Lots of people are doing the no opening parties, but to tell you the truth...kids like to see their buddy open the present that they picked out for them.

This whole openning presents thing later is new to me. When I was a kid we openned presents at the party......then, as an adult, attended parties in which the kids never openned the presents - I thought it was weird.......I'm now used to the idea but I will continue to have my kids open the presents at their party - I thought it was part of the party just like the cake!

Kids like to watch their friends open their gift to them. So i think it is rude not to open them during the party.

Someone asked this recently, and this was my response:
This is one of those topics that is so frustrating, because I am reading all about how the kids can't handle watching someone else open presents, they might get bored, they'd rather play...well, what about kids learning that sometimes it's all about SOMEONE ELSE and not ME! I think the presents should be opened, because someone picked it out...another good lesson, it's better to GIVE than to receive. People want to see the gift they bought opened. Also, someone mentioned that the toys might get opened and pieces lost....again, is there no control or expectations of the kids? someone can put the toys away after the wrapping is gone. when we have low expectations for our kids to learn these social lessons, they will meet them.

This was her update after the party:
After reading all the helpful responses, I had completely planned to not open presents at the party, but I would still ask the guests we could open their child's gift if they felt their child wanted to see my child do so. So, we were at the party and it got close to the end, and I felt like we needed to open gifts! It just didn't seem right to not do so and my mother-in-law suggested that we do so during the cake and ice cream. Well, it turned out beautifully!! My husband first brought the child who brought whichever gift we were opening up at the time and set him/her next to my son. Then I opened the gift for my son while he ate his cake and ice cream. Then, held up the gift and my husband took a picture of gift, son, and gift-giver (it helped to keep track of who gave what gift as I wrote thank you cards). A lot of the kids gathered around, and many would point to the gift excitedly and say, "I brought that one!" It was perfect. Wrote all the thank you cards that same evening. So glad for all your suggestions, and this turned out just the right way! :)

Well, I guess I am not the norm, but I much prefer to wait to open gifts, whether I am attending a party or it is my own child's party. Of course kids love gifts...but I think it is more important to spend that time having fun all together. I even write on our invitations every year that the persons attendance is a gift to us, and presents are optional. If you had a smaller party with just a handful of guests, then opening gifts might be okay...but we had 21 kids at our last party...so no way I wanted to put anyone through that! I also want my kids to enjoy opening the gifts, instead of rushing them through. And I also like things to be organized so I can write down the info. I think forcing everyone to watch a kid open gifts is kind of forcing the child to be self-centered. Obviously we are all there to love and celebrate that child...but it doesn't have to be completely all eyes on the child. I like my kids to share their day. Just my opinion!

Your child should open the gifts with his friends. Really.

Children need to learn that sometimes someone ELSE has a special day...and they have to watch and be pleased for them. This is an important life lesson.

If you don't want to write, kindly ask another family member to help you out while you whisk away trash or put presents aside. Properly planned, this CAN go very smoothly.

Also, be sure that thank you's are sent to the CHILD who brought the present, not the parent who paid for it.

It seems to be a trend among my sons parties, to NOT open gifts at the party. I like it quite a bit. The kids get more time to play, my son doesn't get jealous about the gifts and no one ends up feeling awkard about not spending as much as someone else. We didn't open gifts at our party this past weekend and it I really liked the flow of the party much better.

Personally, I love watching the kids opening their presents. But I don't necessarily find it rude to wait and open them later. This happens a lot in my family, partly because, as you say, it takes FOREVER and the kids get bored, it's hard to keep the little ones out of trying to "help" or grabbing the new stuff, etc., etc. If you are having a big party and there are a ton of gifts, and your son isn't begging to open them, then just wait on it. When taking gifts from the guests, make sure you write their name somewhere on the package, so that in case there isn't a card you can be sure to thank them properly.

I prefer they dont open the presents at this age for birthday parties! It can take a long time and the other kids are going to want to "help" and play with the new toys-and if the kid doesnt like the toy that is received sometimes it can be hard to hide! Just write down what is from who and send thank you cards. Thats plenty!

I do special events and like for the parties to be planned, but also to go with the flow..

If the kids are having a total blast, I leave it up to the birthday child if they want to stop and open gifts.. Usually this is the indication the party is ending. So many kids would rather continue to party till the very end (so do the guests)..

Either way is acceptable. No it is not rude to not open them in front of everyone. Especially since he is going to be writing really nice thank you notes to each person.

We never open gifts at parties! If a special friend or family member wants to see their gift opened we do it privately. Good luck and have fun!

No biggie to NOT open presents. You just need to make sure they are hidden after everyone gets there. My son had his party a couple of weeks ago and by the end of the night, everyone wanted to open presents. It was chaotic as you noted. Wish I'd put them aside instead of leaving out for everyone to see. It's too tempting for that age. Also, think about it...if you have a party at Chucky Cheese, do you open presents? No, probably not. You load them in the car & take them home to open.

I would not open the presents in front of everyone. Not everyone can afford the same. In a small party 10 and under you might be ok. Anything over I'd just open later and send a thank you card. Good time for your son to learn about getting gifts and sending thank you cards.

Just set them aside on a table and open them after the party is over. They'll be having such a blast at the pool, it wont take away time from the fun. Also, you won't have to deal with a less-than-enthusiastic face if he doesn't like some. ;-)

I say, open the gifts after the party. I despise opening presents in front of everyone for a variety of reasons - kids don't want to sit still, they want to play with the toys, they all want to sit up front, it's boring for the adults, it's messy, sometimes parents get weird & competitive over cost of gifts, it's time consuming, etc. etc.

I would have to say it bothers me a bit when gifts are opened once we're gone...We made the effort to go out and buy the thing and come to your party, so the least ya can do is open it and thank me properly...Plus we like to see whether he/she liked it or not....It's the little things...If things are getting held up, just intervene and say "Ok, Billy, time to move on to the next one, and open it yourself if need be...

I think I have consistantly seen that the parties where the people attending are close friends and family, the presents are opened during the party.
The parties that are playgroup friends and school friends, the presents are opened later.
I'm sure you'll make a good decision. :)

I thought it was weird too, but when we moved out of country it seemed the norm. I love it this way. It's easier to keep track of gifts and givers, plus the kids seem to be having too much fun to care anyway. My only thing is.... PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE sent out thank you notes. It's such a little thing and it means sooooo much :)

Another thing~ if there are multiple gifts, it's so much easier "regifting" later. No one I know (except me) includes gift receipts. ;)