? For Mom's of More than One!

The love is different but the same amount...I know that sounds weird, but true. My oldest was a tough baby in fact I considered not having another, he was high needs all the way. My second was the easiest most laid back child ever.

I love my first, my son for all we got through together and the way he challenges me as a mom...and I love my second, my daughter for being the easy going girl she is and just making my life easy.

Different but the same intensity of love. I have a favorite things I love about each child...but not a favorite child I would choose over the other. It will work out trust me...I worried about the very same thing, only in reverse.

I felt similar to how Holly Beth felt I had a girl and when she was 10 months I found out I was unexpectedly pregnant again. I wanted her to have a sister because I have 2 and can not imagine not having one..I ended up having a boy and now have another boy..It is very hard to describe but I was affraid I wouldn't know what to do with a boy but they are also so much fun in such a different way I love them all to pieces and my older son had acid reflux and was a very difficult baby, and my almost 2 year old can be a handful but I still love them all very much the same but also very differently if that makes sense! Congrats and everything will be wonderful!!!

I have five little ones now. You love them each just as much, only differently. The new ones you love just as much, but you don't know them as well. So, at first, I could see how you might think you love the others more...but in time you'll grow to fall in love with any and all you have.

For me personally, I fell in love quickly with each that came along...just that there was a phase of getting to know them. My newest baby is only two weeks old, and we are all smitten by her.

My first was my most difficult. I've always been glad because it's made each additional one seem easier. I'm not sure how it would work to have a harder second child. I think since you're aware of favorites, you'll be less likely to have a favorite. I don't have a favorite or a least favorite with my five. It's totally possible to love them all just as much for different reasons.

When it comes to boys and girls, there is a special bond between mother and son. I grew up with only having sisters. I didn't know what it was like to have a boy. No idea. My 2nd was my son, and we have a very special bond. It's like the father/daughter bond, only mother/son. I didn't know that type of bond existed! I love my four girls just as much as my boy, only different. I love them each different and just as much.

I really think you'll find you'll be okay:-) Even if he's a more difficult baby, you'll feel a tremendous amount of love. Just don't freak out if you don't feel as deep of a love immediately...you've had two years to get to know your daughter. Your new baby will be new, and I know it can take a little bit of time for some to develop that deep love. It doesn't mean you are favoring one over the other or anything like that.

It's normal to have worries and stresses when ti comes to new babies! You always wonder how it'll work out, but in the end, it always does:-) Hang in there...I'm sure you'll be blown away with how much you love your boy!

I am a mom of 3, 2 girls and 1 boy. Let me just start out by saying that I don't favor any of them more than the other, however, I do love them all in my own special way. Each of them are so different and so special and I don't ever feel as though one is better than the other. Yes, have I compared my children to one another as babies, sure, one slept better than the other, ate better than the other etc. but as they were babies and are now growing, I see something special and unique in each of them and it makes me love them to pieces. Boys are much different than girls in their own way. At first you'll find they are all alike, boys/girls as babies, they do basically the same exact things (eat, sleep, poop) just w/ boys you have to watch out for being peed on, once he becomes mobile, you'll really start seeing the differences. :) He'll keep you on your toes for sure, but in turn, he'll turn around, say "I wuv you mama" and it will melt your heart!!! Girls love tutu's, frilly things, gossip, just like us ;)...just keep in mind each are different and that is absolutely OK!!! :)

My oldest was the most difficult of all my children! Most would have probably stopped then! He’s 13 now and he’s a great kid… always been a great kid, just a lot of issues early on. My 8 year old… really easy baby and toddler but now he is giving us a run for our money! My 3 year old daughter is a sweetheart but she never stops…ever! I guess my point is that each of my children whom I love dearly…at times drive me absolutely crazy and at other times amaze me…equally! You will love this second baby with all your heart!

I have 2 girls who are polar opposites in temperant. I love them the exact same. Yes, somedays, I like one more than the other, but which one that is changes from day to day. My first baby like yours was easy. My 2nd daughter, well . . . she wants what she wants when she wants it, but I love seeing the fire and determination in her even when its making things difficult. She is an amazing baby and already a force to be reckoned with!Both of your kids will have their strengths and weaknesses, but you will love every bit of them!

Hi---I just had my second baby in July. I have a 3 year old girl, and the new baby is also a girl. I had so many of the same exact feelings you do! I think it's all the pregnancy hormones---it's all very normal. I was so worried that I just wouldn't possibly be able to share my love with two. I was completely in love with my first and thought she was an angel. And there's just something so special about your first baby--because it's all new. Everyone told me not to worry, that my heart would just double in size and it would all work out, but I wasn't so sure. Well, I can tell you now, that's it's true. I am completely in love with my little baby---so much that sometimes I'm actually annoyed with my 3 year old, because she demands my attention away from the baby. It is definately hard with two, and It was really hard for me to not be able to give my 3 yr.. old all the attention. But I've also found that the 3's can be a challenging time, and my little angel, has turned into a sassy, moody, mouthy girl at times.....things are always changing with kids I've learned. Don't worry----really--no matter what, you always just LOVE your kids. I don't have a favorite, because they are unique individuals and I love them uniquely.

When I was pregnant with my second (another girl) I felt the same way. I couldn't imaging how i could ever love another child as much. I can honestly tell you that 3 years later, I have two girls who are completely different and I love them both. Sometimes the differences are the things I like the most about #2. I always thought #1 was the greatest b/c she was so sweet, smart, easy going etc. But I love the fact that #2 is so spunky and does things completely differently!

It is totally normal to feel that way....give yourself a break. I had my son two years after my perfect, sweet, beautiful angel of a daughter. To this day she is still the most beautiful perfect baby she literally looked like a doll and my pregnancy, labor and parenting with her was a breeze. My son was born with a blue forehead, baby acne, and scratches all over his face after a horrid pregnancy and even worse delivery. He cried constantly, and was never happy....totally opposite of my first. He is 10 now and still difficult and stubborn but guess what....he is such a cool little guy with his own personality( actually alot like me ;) ) and I love him every bit as much as my daughter....and I even survived to have another one :). Dont worry no matter what this baby is like you will love that little boy every bit as much and little boys loooove their mommies.

I am not sure I can help how you feel, but I will tell you this. I had a 2 year old daughter whom I adored and was expecting my 2nd. I begged, prayed that I would have another girl. I just loved the thought of sisters, and having the 3 of us have girl time together for years to come. At 18 weeks, I found out it was a boy. I wasn't disappointed, I was feeling ok. Not overjoyed but happy he was healthy. Well, this little boy turned out to be the most amazing child who I bonded with immediately. I cannot imagine my life without my baby boy. It's seriously a different emotion than with a girl. He completed my family in so many ways! It was wonderful to see my daughter pretend to be a little mommy too.

Your daughter is probably the way she is because of the way her environment is. You have a great chance of having another baby that's easy to deal with. You may have forgotten the stresses the first 6 mos brings because you were wrapped up with just loving your daughter and trying to be the best mom you can be. Do the same with your son, learn his triggers and I bet it will be great... especially since he will have you AND his sissy to help bring him up. Don't anticipate disaster, he'll feel that and be it. I think it's going to be great.

The bond between mother and son is different, very sweet. My boy hugs in a way my daughter never did.

It is very different, and this is a good thing! Don't worry, your newborn will give off the right chemicals and you will be head over heels in love in no time at all!

My second son was sooooooo different from my first son. Silly me...I thought they'd be the same. It wasn't until we faced a serious, almost-go-to-the-hospital illness with my youngest that I realized that he had different needs and different solutions. Now, at 17 and 13, my boys are still very different personalities. One is a scholar; one is a warrior. One loves sports; one is super-klutz. One is smooth with the ladies; one is goofball. <sigh> But! They love each other, they get along great and I'm proud to be their mama.

Bottom line, you will love your new baby but it will be different from the love you bear your daughter. That's ok. Differences are good and causes for celebration. Once you embrace the differences, the joy can begin! I'm just sad it took me my baby's entire first year to learn this!

Good luck!

It's hard to imagine that you could love another child as much as your first, but that's exactly what will happen. You don't have to work at it, it just happens. Try not to worry so much and let nature just take it's course. If he is a difficult baby, then so what? You'll get through it. You won't love him any less.
My son (and first born) has always been a spirited one. My daughter is more laid back, but guess what? She still has that same spark in her eye that he has. It's amazing to see these differences between them, and even more amazing to note what they have in common. I love them equally, and more than life itself.
The beauty of the second child is that YOU are more relaxed and experienced. It's so much easier in general the second time around. Take it easy and enjoy these last few weeks.

He will be just as special as she is, just in his own adorable way.

My son was 2 when I had my daughter. I was worried about my feelings towards the new baby. My pregnancy wasn't like the first, in the sense that I didn't feel too connected to the baby because I was so busy with my son. I was scared that I wouldn't love this baby as much as him, I was worried about having a girl since I only knew what it was like to have a boy. That all went away the moment my daughter was born. I don't know how to explain it, but I immediately fell in love with her. Once I brought her home I felt so much more comfortable and confident in taking care of her then I did when I had my son. It's true they are very different. He was my difficult, fussy baby but great as a toddler and she was my easy, happy baby that is now proving to be more difficult as a toddler, but we'll see. They are 3 and 1 now and just starting to play together, they love each other and I love watching them grow up together. Good luck and enjoy your baby, the second one grows up so much faster than the first trust me!!

You love your daughter for all that she is. All the things that make her her. And you will love your second for all that he is. He will be a different person, and you will love him differently. You will love him for the things that make him himself. And you might get along better with one of your children, or you might get along better with one of them at times, and the other at other times. But, that doesn't mean that you have a favorite. Just make sure that they both/all know that you love them, and that they get what they need. You don't have to treat your children the same, and in fact you shouldn't. What will make one child happy and secure might be very different from what will make the next child happy and secure. But you will love them. Have no fears about that.

I think we all wonder, how can I love someone more/as much as I love you? about our children? So here I'll pose a question to you...do you love your husband less since your daughter came along? Did you have to split your love so now he only get's 50% as much as he used to? Of course not!

I think your anxieties are all a normal part of pregnancy/adding to your family. You learn to appreciate each member of your family for who they are.

Relax Mama, you'll love your new little bundle as much as everyone else - even if he does test your patience!

Your daughter sounds exactly like mine was until she turned 6 then it changed, but she is still amazing. Now I have an 18 month old daughter and they are polar opposites in both looks and personality.

I love them both with all my heart and would give my life for both of them, but I do love them differently. The first one has always been so easy and just an easy going person and all around great kid. The second one was not an easy baby and has been a challenge since the 5th week of my pregnancy. She is fussy, moody, and challenging, but she is funny, outgoing, smart, full of energy and spirit. She can make me laugh so hard. I truly love them both and they both have good and bad qualities. The first one tends to be so easy going she will go along with anyone even if it is something she shouldn't do.

There have been times that I find myself at the end of my rope with the baby, but then she does something funny and it is all so worth it. You will find the love for both of them, it will just be different.

When I was pregnant with my 2nd, I had similar thoughts. "I already have the cutest, funniest, best behaved, smartest, most perfect child in the world. How can #2 equal him? How can I love him as much? I'll be a horrible mother because I'll love #1 more!" I now have 3 boys who are tied for first :) They each have their own personalities, strengths, and weaknesses. My parenting struggles and joys are different with each child. But the amazing thing about love is that it doesn't divide between the children, it multiplies! Yes, boys and girls are different. But girls are also different from other girls, and boys are different from other boys. Instead of focusing on the potential differences that are not enjoyable, focus on the differences that will bring even more fun to your life - trucks, bugs, dinosaurs, buzz cuts or spiked hair, the creative ability to turn anything into a weapon, and have you seen the cute dress-up clothes in the boys' section?!