Father of Children Being Unreasonable

J.,

Let the machine pick up and record all messages (if possible), the threat of violence is serious (and a crime) so report the incident or incidents to the police. They may go have a talk with him.

Great that your new friend isn't intimidated by your old friend, hope you are not replacing one A hole for another. The new one sounds nice, but aren't they "ALL" so nice in the beginning? The last thing you need is for two grown men going ballistic in the presence of your children.

By all means get a custody order in place and if the father of your children is so "interested" in their welfare, he can start paying child support and visiting on a court ordered regular basis. Have the child support go through the District Attorney - Family Services office. This way if he stops paying they will go after him.

I don't think the father has any say over who you and your children associated with unless they are a danger to the kids.

Blessings....
....

Actually, I disagree with Julie in a way. A man that has been completely absent from their lives has no right to just barge back in and try to upset the balance of things.

Get a restraining order and get a court order for custody, like NOW!

You need to have a talk with him and let him know that this has nothing to do with you two anymore, its about the kids, for you, your bf and needs to be for your ex aswell. Understand him as much as possible. It cant be easy for him to know all the time that is being spent with the bf. I hope those details aren't coming from you. I would also get something court ordered asap. Good luck be patient and try your hardest for your kids to keep the communication running.

Lawyer up. Do it now.

Hi J.,

I believe bio dad is coming from a place of FEAR and anger (being replaced as dad) and is reacting at this point. I hope it is just words. However, I would document everything and do consider going through the court with respect to making things official with custody. Be clear with ex what is appropriate behavior and what you will not tolerate (for example, if he is saying he will visit the kids and plan to interact with beau during this time, it would not be a great time to visit. Do consult with the court / social services on how the visits can be set-up if things continue down this path. S. A. K., MFT
http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/pages/S.-A-K.-Marriag...

Just keep the beau away from the father. So if you have to drop off the kids & beau is with you drop him off a few blocks away then go pick him up after you drop them off. Obviously an Order of Protection should apply if he is threatening him, maybe that's what your beau should get against the father.

It's never a good idea for a woman to bring boyfriends around her children, and although your childrens daddy acting hostile, he has a right to not want another man around his children especially if one is a daughter. You can always file a restraining order if you all fear for your saftey for for the kids sake you should all try and find a medium ground. I wish people would learn that children are meant for marriage and a stable home with a mother and father. J.