Dying Friend

If at all possible, go see her. Let her know that you value her and the times you've spent together. Tell her what she meant to you. Tell her how you will remember her. If you can't visit then absolutely call. Whatever you do, don't do nothing.

Go see her. If not for her, then for you. Don't worry about what to say. Don't say anything at all-just be there for a few.
When my Grandpa was on hospice he used the time to call everyone in his phone book and joke about how dying sucked. He had people bringing him sweets around the clock-diabetes didn't matter anymore. We were all a little embarrassed that he was putting friends on the spot, but they didn't mind coming to see him and having a few last laughs. And we were happy that he had so many people support him in his last few days.

Go see her.
Take her flowers.
Tell her what your friendship has meant to you.
Thank her for what she's added to your life.
Tell her you love her, hug her and say goodbye.

I lost a good friend last year. It was O. if the hardest trips I ever had to make. But I'm so glad I did. Both being Christian, I told her I'd see her in a little bit...

Hi A.-

So sorry about your friend.

I would 'bring music'...from her 'era'...her taste....on CDs that she can listen to.

Hold her hand...touch her...HUG her.

Share stories..."remember when....."

Tell her she will always be remembered and honored.

Tell her you love her and she was significant in your life....and share stories about that.

Tell her goodbye...and maybe 'til we meet again'...or 'to infinity and beyond'?

When my best friend died of cancer at age 21 we used to go out all the time and have fun. She wore a wig everywhere. When things got so bad and she couldn't leave the house I went to a Sugar Ray concert (her favorite at the time) and had the band sign a photo of them to her. It meant the world to her and it wasn't all sad.

Go visit. Give her a hug. There's nothing spectacular she wants, just friendship.

Go visit her. Sit and talk to her. If she is not up to talking just hold her hand. Tell her how much you care for her.

This brings back soooo many memories of my loss January 2012 (dad)!

Go to her. Be STRONG! You may be shocked at her weight loss, her non recognition, etc. Follow her family's lead. If it appears they want you to leave after a short visit, do so.

My daddy did not want outside visitors and I think that I too would not visitors, but since you have been given the okay--go soon--one hour can change a terminal person's response abilities. Blessings.

Go see her. Give her a hug. Tell her you are sorry, and that you will miss her.

Go and see her. Do not wait. Hospice is available 24 hrs a day. You can even call there and find out when is a good time to visit.

Tell her how important she has been to her, Tell her you will never forget her. Ask her if there is anything you can help her family with (If you want / can help them)

I am sending you a hug.

My aunt passed away from cancer almost a year ago. I know that she appreciated every visitor, every caller, every card (Even the cards from people she had never met, example: A friend of my grandma's). My suggestion is that you go and visit her.

Not just a call; a visit. That would probably mean the world to her right now. Go to her.

Call. Talk . You don't have to talk only about her illness. When a dear friend of mine was dying, I would go over to his house to take care of him and give his fiancee a break. He slept a lot of the time I was there due to the morphine he was on, but he liked waking up to see a friendly face. I was working on a baby blanket at the time and I brought my knitting bag with me to knit while he slept. He was fascinated by my knitting and would ask me questions about different kinds of stitches. He was my dog trainer and we talked a lot about our dogs. If you can't be there in person, a friendly voice on the phone is the next best thing.

Go see her. Be prepared to do most of the talking as she will probably not be up to it. Just every day stuff. Tell her about the kids, everyday life, things going on with anyone that you still work with that she may know (nothing real gossipy though, just things like so-and-so had a baby, ot so-and-so is engaged/married.) Talk about the same things you would talk about over lunch.

She knows she is dying, so there is no need to act like she is not. I'm not saying bring it us or anything, but you don't need to feel awkward about trying to see her "one last time". It will mean alot to her.

When a friend of my dad's way dying he did just that. Went to see him (he lived several hours away) and just filled him in on the kids (my brother and myself), his job, how fishing had been that summer.... IT was hard for my dad, but I know it meant alot to his friend and my dad treasures those last memories.

**HUGS**

I have a similar situation. A friend who has metastatic cancer and is frail and weak. We just went over to talk with her. Don't stare at her, my friend said it was really hard when her family just sat there and stared at her. Just talk about what's going on, how she's feeling, whatever she wants to talk about. Let her know that you're willing to help if she just lets you know what she needs.

You have to call. It's very difficult to know the "perfect" thing to do, so just settle for telling her how much she means to you and something funny you shared. Ask if she feels like a visit but be aware she may just want to be quiet. Tell her to call if she needs ANYTHING. Maybe bring her some special thing you shared.

My dad had a similar situation awhile ago. He wasn't able to see his friend before he passed, so he wrote him a letter instead. I think it was mainly sharing stories he remembered about working together over the years and how much he enjoyed their friendship. The friend received it before he passed and it meant a lot to him. If you aren't able to or aren't comfortable paying a visit, perhaps this would work for you.

You'll have to call. Offer to go over and visit, bring magazines or let her rest. She'll let you know her preference. :)

I am sure she would love to see you and sending love trough a group of friends is not sufficient. Visit and tell her how much her friendship has meant to you and that you are going to miss her so very much. What a joy spending time with her has been, give a big hug and tell her what a special person she is and how she will be missed. You do not have to be religious to be comforting because we all have souls and spirits that are the essence of our beings. Of course, ask if there is any thing special she needs or what you can do to comfort her. Last, but not least, there are special books of comfort that may bring her peace and solace at this difficult time.

If you don't go see her, you will forever question your decision. I have seen many hospice, and non- hospice patients losing their battles with cancer. Don't stress about what to say, as your presence will say everything you can't.