Do Your Kids Eat What You Eat?

My kids have always ate what we ate. I don't cater. It isn't like I cook gross foods, just a normal variety.

Have you let them add spices? Like have the spices you would normally put in sitting there and they do it. I have found when giving my kids control of the spices they add a lot more flavor than I thought they would and eat it without complaint.

I do not cook separate meals or offer an alternative. I do occasionally "alter" what I am serving for them. For example: I know my oldest doesn't like mushrooms (he has tried to like them!) so I will dish his dinner up before adding the mushrooms. I offer a variety of foods at each meal and I always feed them at least 1 or 2 things I know they will eat so if they only eat the 3 required bites of what they don't think they like (and usually end up liking after trying) they still have plenty of other food to eat. My boys are 8 and 4 and it has never been a battle for us.

My kids USUALLY eat what we eat. But when it's something I know they won't like, they get something easy like leftovers, a sandwich or eggs. Also if they tell me they do not like what I'm serving, I tell them they can have a pb sandwich.

Well I disagree that it's "your fault". Everyone's tastes are different. Young children have extremely sensitive taste buds and other struggle with textures, smells, and flavors. My kids are now 15-20 and eat pretty much everything. But all ALL went through various food strikes over the years.

I feel eating should be a pleasant, stress free thing. In fact it involves 4 senses, it is not just plain fuel.

But then I'm a major foodie, I love cooking, I love knowing history of food, I love the sociology of food. And through most of it, I was not working all day then coming home to the task of coming up with several different things so everyone eats.

People should eat what they like. Food phases kids have will come and go, and your household philosophy about food and meals and family time will reflect how long that takes.

ALL food has merit. There is only TOO MUCH of one thing and not enough of another.

When they got a little older and I was able to involve them more in the process, they were actually excited to try different things. Sometimes they liked it sometimes they didn't. But it was cool watching Alton Brown as a family (oh! let's try that!), then shopping for it and KNOWING things about it before sitting down together to TRY it.

I can personally guarantee a 3 year old who only currently eats THREE THINGS will grow up big and strong in spite of it, and will (down the road) be WANTING to be a part of the process if it's presented in a positive light.

I've answered a zillion questions like this with my, um, unpopular philosophy. But it has worked very well for US. And now 2 are away at college and the youngest cooks full meals from a recipe by herself, I am VERY glad to have used even FOOD as a positive learning experience for my kids.

Bon Appetit!

:)

We had 8 kids. If we had catered to them we (mostly my wife when the kids were young) would have had to fix 9 meals. NO WAY ! ! !

We raised our family like your husband feels. Eat what we eat or don't eat. You will have lots of weeping and wailing to put up with, but learning is part of life. And learning to like something different (food) is also part of life. Picky eaters are only picky if they are allowed to be picky.

Now is the time to change. We had a man at work that did excellent work. He was a very picky eater. The bosses always had a hard time finding a restaurant to have a dinner meeting because he was so picky. I know he was passed over for at least one promotion because they figured if he wouldn't try a new food, he might not be willing to try a new idea or a new innovation.

Good luck to you and yours.

My MIL had an infamous battle of the wills when my hubs was pre-school aged. She asked him if he wanted his egg scrambled or fried. She cooked it to his liking, then he threw a tantrum. He dug in his heels and refused to eat it. She dug in harder, and refused to serve him anything else. That same egg came out for lunch, dinner and breakfast again, until he finally relented. He was allowed water and saltines until he came round. He has never again been picky about food ever.

My mom, on the other hand, played the role of short order cook.

I'm going to follow the route of my MIL on this one.

Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.

I have only one child and I know it sounds a little crazy, but several times a week I make a different meal for him, my husband, and me!! I grew up with all of us eating the same meal too but that is not the way it is here. My son is picky eater and my husband can't eat any dairy. Don't feel bad, your situation is much more common than you realize. I think it's one of those dirty little secrets. Sorry, I have no suggestions...at least all 3 kids eat the same thing!

I just wanted to add that I am assuming your children do not have any sensory issues? There is no reason why at their age they can't be eating more like you guys. But it really annoys me (Yeah, 8kidsdad, I'm talking to you!) blanket statements about picky eaters. Many so called picky eaters have sensory issues that the parents may or may not be aware of. So easy to judge...

emmy eats what we eat. the only exception is if I make a spicy dish like tacos then I'll put a little meat aside with a tad less spice. she pretty much likes everything except very spicy foods and raw tomatoes .
Although in your circumstance in regards to the veggies I dont see why you have to make them eat more flavored veggies filled with butter and such. Emmy likes steamed veggies with no butter or sauce and I try not to encourage her to pick up my bad habits of adding butter although if i'm making veggies and not J. throwing a steamer pack in the microwave she eats what we serve

Our home is not a restaurant and I'm definitely not a short order cook. The only exception to this rule is allergies. We have 1 kid that is allergic to shell fish we make provisions for that kid only.

All children in my world eat what I'm eating or choose not to eat at all. Most kids opt to eat and gain an adventurous side.

My husband would accuse you of letting the inmates run the assylum.

At my house everyone eats the same thing and always has if they don't like it they don't have to eat it but that means they are going to bed early. This is not a restaurant.

Haha!! I could have written this post. Word for word. Our kids are even almost the same ages. I am curious to read your responses as I am sick of making multiple meals as well.

I always cooked just one meal. But any family member (including my husband lol!) was welcome to make something else for themselves if they didn't like what was being served. The only rule was it had to be healthy and they had to clean it up. They could make a sandwich, reheat leftovers from the night before, grab some fruit and a cheese stick, pour a bowl of (healthy) cereal and milk, etc.
You don't need to be a short order cook, just give them healthy options AND the responsibility of preparing it and cleaning it up. It's a great life skill, it builds confidence in the kitchen and a strong communal table. All three of my kids have grown into great cooks :)

Okay, first off, your kids are just used to this "plain" menu. Often kids say they don't like foods without even giving it a chance or even tasting it.

Second, your husband is right! My mom catered to my younger brother because he was picky. And he stayed that way until he joined the Marines after high school. Why? Because it became "eat or starve". It sounds harsh, but it's not that bad. It's practical.

My children are 21 months and 9 months old. They BOTH eat what I make for dinner. We tend to give the toddler less saucy things for mess reasons but she's allowed to dip. And she even sits at the table with us. She has plates, utensils, cups, and even a place mat. And the baby either hand feeds herself or I puree dinner and spoon feed it to her.

"We are not raising kids. We are raising future adults." - Dr. Phil

Me, my Husband, my son, my daughter, we ALL eat what *I* cook.
Even my picky eating son... who has been a picky eater since he was a baby... eats what I cook.
I cook ALL kinds of foods, from all cultures. And me/my husband/my son/my daughter, eats what I cook.
No battles.

I do not expect them to eat *JUST* like *me.* But, as a Mom and Wife, I KNOW my family and what they all like to eat. Thus, I cook, in a user friendly manner. I cook what I know is well liked, by ALL.
I cook from scratch.
And if they want more seasoning on their food, they can put it on themselves. ie: tabasco, pepper, salt, ketchup, mustard, etc. No biggie.

I don't cook plain flavored foods.
I cook all kinds.

But we do NOT force our kids... to eat if they are full. We teach our kids to eat according to their body's cues. Hungry or full, they know their body.
Meal time is not a battle in my house.
And we do not use food as punishment or as rewards.

my kids are only 2 1/2 and 5 but yes they have always eaten what we eat. I do not make separte meals, and never will. One meal is enough. Now if i try a new recipe then the kids have to at least try a decent bite of it. If they really do not like it then they can have a sandwich or something. They are great eaters. We have our nights where they just dont want what i make, but that is to bad. if they are hungry they will eat it.

Simplify your life and cook one meal that you and hubby like. Don't feel guilty if your kids don't like the way it tastes at first. We learn to like what we get used to eating. So give your kids a chance to learn to like a wider variety of foods.

My kids didn't love everything I cooked. But over the years they learned to eat most everything. In fact, now that I have 2 teenaged boys, they eat everything and then some!

I do self assemble meals a lot. A variety of food is put on the table in separate bowls and everyone gets to create the meals on their plates: Baked Potato Bar; Fish Tacos Bar; Salad Bar; Pasta Bar (with pasta, veggies, sauces, grilled chicken); Turkey Burger Bar, Make Your Own Pizza etc. By getting them involved in the process of putting it together, my job is easier, they feel invested, I get to set the guidelines (at least one veggie or fruit and one protein must be chosen), they feel empowered and it is fun for all of us.

It does take time to train open minded eater, but empowering gives them confidence that they can try new things. Our rule is you must try three bites. After that you can choose to incorporate it into your diet or retry it again in the future. Knowing that they can choose to like it now or know taste buds change with time, teaches them to be open minded.

Good luck.

I completely agree with Theresa. I distinctly remember my parents forcing us to eat what they ate as children. My parents ate a ton of meat, they were definitely steak and potatoes kind of people. My grandfather owned a poultry business, so there was also a lot of chicken eating. You can imagine their dismay when I announced I wanted to be a vegetarian at 16. They said it was a phase. (I guess it has been one long phase). Well, my father said he wouldn't cater to that. I had to work at 16 to buy my own groceries to be a vegetarian. I still resent that to this day. Sure, I can see working to pay for a car, insurance, spending money, but seriously, food? Healthy food? He had the philosophy that I had to eat what they ate or I would pay for it, literally.

Anyway, I vowed I wouldn't do that to my children. My husband is also a vegetarian and our children are too at this point. We have been very open with them and always allowed them to try meat when they have asked. If they wanted to eat it, I would bring it home. We eat at enough friends and families homes as well as restaurants that they have access to it, have tried it and don't like it.

So, my kids often times eat the same as we do, BUT they do not like spice at all. They too prefer their food bland. I usually make something and separate it, seasoning it differently. My husband and I love spice, pepper, hot sauce and the kids do not. I wouldn't want to force pepper on my children just because I love it. Why should I torture them at dinner, I want everyone to enjoy it. The thought of forcing them to eat something they hate bothers me. If they have never tried it, I do have them take at least a couple of bites to officially decide if they like it or not.

It sounds like your kids are still eating healthy. I think when parents give their kids junk while they eat healthy, that's an issue. If you just have to separate your kids food and add more flavor to yours, well that is just allowing your kids to enjoy their meal. I don't see anything wrong with that.

I think a lot of cooks in the family run into this very same hurdle.

What I did was sit down with my kids and told them I was bored cooking their bland and tasteless and non-nutritive meal choices. I would still make them the occasional Mac-N-Cheese, but from now on there would be plenty of variety and I was no longer cooking two meals. Otherwise, the cook will go insane and there will be NO meals as opposed to at least one.

I do keep seasonings simple on family dinners and add my own level of chili powder, Tobasco type flavorings.

The other night my son did not like what I made. It was Paella and I used a lot of leftover green beans, which he detests. So I pointed to the pantry for him to make his own PB&J.

Honestly, I would never play short order cook. I have learned however from other cultures and cuisines to serve more than just one meat, one starch, one veggie style of dinner. I frequently cook different proteins, if not on the same night than alternating nights and there are leftovers to augment any dinner.

GL!

Our daughter has never liked creamy sauces.. especially anything made with cream of anything soup.. No ranch dressings.. Not into butter on bread..

Casseroles just freak her out. the texture, the smell.. The visual.

And actually she ends up eating a lot healthier because of this..

Of course as she got older she got better about the spaghetti with the sauce on top, but she liked to do the proportions herself. ..She likes more pasta and veggies than a lot of sauce.. ..

She is not into cheese sauces.. But loves her veggies lightly steamed with just a bit of salt, pepper and lemon..

She has never cared for salad dressing, but now makes her own.. Lots less oil and salt in her versions.

Will she eat what we eat now, yes, mostly, but when she makes it the way she likes it, it is a lot simpler.

I have also found if she helps me prepare the dish, she is a lot more likely to eat something like lasagna or enchiladas.. She is still not into mac and cheese. I have always wondered if this is a sensory issue?

She is particular about fabrics too.

I used to make whatever I was cooking plain for her and continue on with the adding of all of the ingredients for us.

Scalloped potatoes for us, plain potatoes for her. Or a micro waved potato for her.

Casserole for us, just the noodles and veggies for her and the meat portion on the side.. This is not extra cooking, it was just keeping some of it to the side and not all mixed up.

They will become more adventurous.. Keep placing a tiny bit on their plates, if they eat it great, if not do not make a big deal out of it.

My daughter is 10 - and she eats what I eat :) If she wants a variation of what I've cooked I don't mind (ex. spagetti with no sauce, etc)

I was a picky eater growing up and the rule was I had to eat three bites and could make a peanut butter sandwich. My wonderful parents shared this bit of information with my children when they were little (awesome).
My son has tried to negotiate making something other than peanut butter. I've told him its not a reward.
Since they're both teenagers now, I secretly believe they plan friend activites on nights I'm not making their choice or they volunteer to cook. They're both pretty good at cooking so it works for me! Now, if only they would clean up WITHOUT being asked...

Good question. I sometimes make 2 meals but the 2nd one is usually for me because I'm the picky eater in my house..lol! Thankfully my kids are not. About the only thing they won't eat is seafood.

At five my daughter eats what I eat. I'm trying to save money and its just she and I. Because she does the grocery shopping with me, meal planning, gardening, she can predict what we'll have for dinner and she has choices within those confines.

But, I don't like tomatoes... crazy avid gardener who is Italian and I don't like tomatoes. I don't make myself eat them (raw) and I don't make her eat broccoli. But, generally, we are eating the same meal because its what we have.

If I make something that I know ahead of time one of my children does not like, I will make something different for them to eat. It drives my husband crazy! :) I don't think it is fair to make them go hungry because I chose to make a dish they do not eat.

For the most part they eat what we eat. I NEVER make them a separate meal. I just make sure to make sides they like. So if we're having enchiladas I will make rice & beans. Give them a little bit of enchilada (knowing it's not their favorite) and rice & beans more than usual. The only exception is when we have sandwiches. My daughter hates lunch meat so I will make her a peanut butter & honey sandwich instead.

My kids are 4 years old and once a while they will eat what we eat but to be honest - I make a meal for them at 5 and my husband and I eat later after they go to bed. I don't feel like eating at 5 o'clock but since my kids are in bed by 7:30, it's easier for us to eat after. I will say though that while my sons are pretty good eaters most of the time, my husband and I have gotten into very bad habits if I don't make a meal. I had to eat what my father wanted to eat for dinner growing up and he had a very limited pallet. I didn't eat cauliflower or broccoli until I went to college! My kids used to love certain foods when they were babies - like asparagus and avocado - and now they act like I'm killing them if I serve it. I work full time and just don't always feel like getting into food battles with my kids daily. They eat a veggie and something that resembles a fruit - even if it is the dreaded apple sauce squeezee - with a protein and some sort of starch. Some days it is a full fledged meal and others it consists of a toasted cheese sandwich, tomato soup and an apple with a yogurt drink on the side. I admit that I do accommodate them for the most part. One of my friends has a son that eats chicken nuggets 4 times a week so I consider myself lucky and just do what I have to do to get everyone fed.

I make one meal for the family. I make a variety of things so hopefully, the kids will like at least one thing on the table. I don't expect them to eat some of everything, every evening. I do expect them to at least try something new though. I will often make pasta with sauce on the side, that way everyone can eat their pasta the way they like.

Yep - I only make one dinner every day. They get choices for breakfast and lunch, but dinner is a one meal kind of thing. I'm lucky that my kids eat fruits and veggies plain or with peanut butter or Ranch...but they are fine to have them without anything too.

Now I'll make some Mexican pasta dish that my hubby and 7 year old don't eat, so I'll take taco meat out for them before I finish it. But that's about as individual as it gets!

We have a 7-1/2 year old daughter and she has to eat what I make for dinner. We also have an 11 month old, so I don't have time to make 2 dinners. There are a few things that I know she won't like when I make them and when that happens, she makes her own dinner(just a sandwich). She learned pretty quickly that she will get very hungry if she doesn't eat what I make...she eats anything now!

I was and still am a VERY picky eater and I don't want my kids to be like me! So, she has to try everything...she doesn't have to like it, but she has to try it.

I cook one meal with my family in mind. That's who I'm cooking for after
all.

My husb & SD are picky eaters but I want them to eat well.
While I"m not a short order cook, I would never make octopus soup, for
instance, if I knew everyone hated it but me.

I cook a meal we can all sit down to with them in mind.
If I want sushi, I go out to eat it w/friends once in a blue moon.

I fix normal things (tacos, spaghetti, steak etc), veggies, salad etc.
SD is on a new diet kick so I try to ladle things w/heavy sauces.
I know what they like & work w/i that guideline.

Sometimes I make a dish we had last week & you can see the eye rolliing but they eat it. It's hot & made for them when they come. If they
are that picky, they can help cook, come up w/recipes etc.

One thing I will say is that when I add spice to the taco meat, the youngest says it's too hot so I take out the meat for that child's serving before adding all the spices. Voila done. Everybody is happy.

While I'm not a short order cook, I am not a drill sargeant. I am a loving mom. I want my family fed & healthy. I don't send anyone to bed hungry (I'm not a warden). I do my best to make something bland enough but
delicious enough to pass for a dinner made with love to feed hungry, growing bodies.

Generally speaking, yes. My DD doesn't like sauce and what is it to me to put it on the side? That way I get as much/little as I want, and so forth. It is not that hard to cook one fillet or one steak with less or no seasoning. I don't consider it short order cooking to modify a few pieces for DD. If we have salmon, she has salmon. If we have steak, she has steak. If we have stir fry, she eats the corn, meat, snow peas and whatever else I can convince her to have out of it.

At the end of it, if a kid really won't eat what's on the table, then the choices are make yourself a sandwich or go hungry. No treats later if you didn't eat dinner.

My SS has a thing about textures so we learned that if he really did not want to eat a food, we should not make him. He just made his own sandwich and brought it to the table.

FWIW, it may just be THEM and not that you caused them to have bland palates. My sister doesn't like spices to this day. What you might try is cooking with them. Get some seasoned but not heavy on the spices recipes (McCormick makes spice pack/recipe cards) and see if they'll eat what they make. My DD is 4 and loves to cook with DH.

On the flip side, if I want chili or brussels sprouts, then I acknowledge that DD is unlikely to eat them. Last night she had turkey slices and fruit with her cornbread instead of chili. And model what you want them to eat. DD has started constructing her own versions of sandwiches and tacos after watching us (and when she does not want a sandwich, she just eats the parts - again, same food, but what do I care if she has toast and cheese vs a grilled cheese sandwich - something she has learned to love, btw).

I do not do food battles or make DD clear her plate. I tell her here are your options and you can take or leave it, but if you leave it, you're not getting chips instead. I had to eat nasty overcooked canned spinach as a kid and I gagged and hated spinach til adulthood. I see no reason to do that to DD, but that doesn't mean I'm a short order cook or that she gets treats instead. There's a middle ground between "you WILL eat this food" and "I'll let you eat anything you want."

My husband gets his own meal when he comes home. Usually he just feels like cereal or a salad, so he does that easily.

My four kids are picky and I never make one meal, nor do I make four. I mix and match whatever is in the house and they can choose what to eat or not of it. So it's a mix of a bunch of stuff, if you will.

Same mistake, same problem! I wish I had a solution for you. The only thing I do is, I don't really cook two meals. I'll cook two versions of the same kind of fish in the same pan. I'll make pasta and heat up some sauce. I'll then put half the sauce in a bowl and add mushrooms, capers, etc. to the rest. Or we'll make our own pizza, and everyone gets to add their own toppings. But, it winds being like 1 1/2 meals, and wasting a lot of dishes.

I keep having this genius idea of, if he (my son) helps cook, he'll eat more different things. But he's got homework, instrument practice, and now either soccer or karate every bloody weeknight. Easier said than done.

So, limited advice but lots of same-boat sympathy for you.

My son has always eaten what we eat. When he started solids, we did single ingredients from our meals. Once he was past that, we pureed what we were eating and that was his meal. He is 6-1/2 now and we still eat family meals together every day. Of course we all have individual preferences. He does not like mango - if there is mango, we add it after he is served. DH does not like uncooked tomato - we treat that the same way. When we go out to eat, he eats from the regular menu (children's menus are amazingly unhealthy and highly monotonous). When he was smaller, he just ate some of whatever we ordered. We do order some cooked or vegetable sushi (we have not been comfortable with him having raw fish yet - but that is us, not him) and if we order meat, we ask for a portion to be well done for him (again our concerns about E coli - not his concerns).

My dd eats what I eat. Sometimes with only a couple of veggies (i eat a lot of different veggies) or sauce on the side, but basically it is the same as mine. As my mom used to say "Hello, this is your home, not the diner down the street, there is only 1 thing on the menu and guess what, thats what your having" lol

Our kids eat what we eat. The only exception that I make is if I make a meal that I know is spicy hot (usually Mexican) then I will let them have a quesadilla if they want. But I do usually make sure that there are enough side dishes that if they don't like the main course they can still get full. We always have a veggetable and a fruit and often a bread. So I know that nobody is going to bed hungry. I do also require them to eat at least one bite of everything. (You can't know if you don't like it if you haven't tasted it.)

The best way to get your kids to try new things and to Like new things is to have your kids friends eat them. My 8 year old eats pretty well, but she hates to try NEW things--unless one of her friends is eating it. And then it must be worth trying. :-)

I'm with the crowd who wonders why you can't just add the sauce to a separate portion? The plain veggies are healthier than the sauced ones, anyway.

When I stir fry, I remove some of the noodles and veggies before adding the sauce. We pretty much never sauce our veggies, otherwise. We mostly eat steamed or boiled veggies plain.

Example - with burritos, I'm assembling them all separately anyway, so I leave out stuff they don't like. And I'll chop up sweet red peppers, saute half of them for the adult burritos, and serve the other half raw to the kids. No spicy stuff in the kids. And youngest gets a quesadilla with beans and guac on the side, otherwise she makes a complete and total mess of it. (She's a deconstructive eater.) Same food, slightly different preparation, not any more time involved.

I so understand where you are coming from. Its just the three of us in my family so wouldn't you know it but everyone has a personal preference of what to have for dinner and how it should be seasoned and I soon became a short order cook. But I made them go "cold turkey" just served it the way I wanted to cook it and got used to the constant complaining. They finally got tired of complaining (cause I pretty much ignored it). Now everyone is happy and grateful to have dinner.

My kids eat what we eat at dinner. For the other meals, I let them choose within reason. And I get veto power if I don't feel like making it.

I'm of the opinion that it's never too late to learn to like a food. I've hated olives my entire life, but I've learned to tolerate them in the last few years. I'm also a pretty recent convert to the virtues of beets. Maybe make your dinners part something you know your kids like and something they have to try. "They" say that it can take up to 10 attempts to get a child to learn to like something.

My daughter ate what I ate for the most part. There were a few foods that she just absolutely hated and I didn't push those on her.
If your kids like food plain, just separate out some for them before adding whatever other seasonings, spices or sauces you like to them.

I don't force my son to eat foods he doesn't like, but I don't cook an entire meal for just him. I am extremely picky. I have very sensitive taste buds and don't like a lot of flavors. I can pick out ingredients I don't like in a dish, but can still taste the flavors after they've been picked out. It's not a matter of not trying a food, it's simply that it tastes nasty. My son is picky like me, but with textures. He doesn't like the texture of most meats. Mushy or slimy type foods are a no go. He likes most flavors, you just have to make sure the texture is right.

My mother likes all kinds of food, so she would make me eat all kinds of different things. I would sit at the table for hours not eating because the food tasted nasty. I just didn't like it and I never outgrew that, no matter how many times I tried it. So, based on my experience, I'm not going to make food a battle in my house. My son can try a bite of food, but if he doesn't like it, he doesn't have to eat it.

I really don't see the issue with your meals. You can still make the same foods, just pull their portions out before you season the rest of the food. Keep the sauce in a separate pan. The 9 year old, and possibly the 7 year old, are old enough to fix a sandwich if they don't like what you cook.

i was a short order cook, ages 2-4. awful. and i did it to myself. one day i finally had it. and i changed it. thank god, as my kids are now 8 and have been eating whatever is prepared. so i agree with your husband. try it and you will love it

Yes, my son eats what my husband and I eat. You might want to slowly transition some of what you eat to them so they are not so resistant.

Good Luck!

If you think you can change it now then I wish you luck....lol.

I do think that if they don't want sauce on the spaghetti that's no big deal, they just don't put sauce on it on their plate.

As for other stuff you do need to start asking them to try it. Our kids do not have to take a bite of anything, I got really tired of cleaning up puke. I do not allow them to say they don't like something at the table. They can say I don't care for any, thank you. So, encourage them to try a bite and then if they do they get dessert.

They will eventually be more willing to try.

Kids do not eat when they get hungry. They will go without food for days if they are forced to do so. Plus they are eating at school so it would be fruitless to try and force them to suddenly start eating what you like to serve.

I have battled over food before and she ended up getting sick. I realized that I did not have to be a dictator over food. She eats when she's hungry and she eats only what she likes. If I don't fix something she likes she can pick a different choice. I don't have to cook a lot of different foods.

The best advice I got from anyone was from my best friend who had children before me. She knew I was an accomplished cook, but told me to "never make a separate meal for DD" and she'll just learn to eat everything. I have to say that the advice has served me well. DD is almost 13 and will eat anything I put in front of her. I don't fool myself into thinking it's ALL my doing, but with her easy going personality and "I'll try anything at least once" attitude from when she was tiny, she's developed quite a pallet.

I think I read somewhere that when food choices are limited (as in nothing much more than chicken nuggets, mac n cheese, pizza, etc., kids don't develop their taste buds/brain connections and the brain then rejects anything "different" later on or something like that. My daughter has always eaten exactly what we've eaten in the same form we ate it (with the exception of maybe a hard to chew protein when she was just starting to eat table foods). She's pretty comfortable ordering salmon, squid, duck or just about anything in a restaurant. We went out tonight and she actually ordered ravioli - she said she wanted something "ordinary" for once. Go figure.

For the most part, our kids eat what we eat. The ONLY time I fix something separate is when I serve shrimp, my son detests it. I don't force it. On days we eat shrimp, he eats a different meat. I don't play short order cook and we don't fight at meal times. I do try to serve something my kids enjoy with each meal. My kids have learned to eat at least small portions of everything and there is usually little complaint at dinner time. If they don't like the meat, I know they will eat the veggies or pasta. We have also taught our children that it's ok not to like things like mushrooms, simply politely eat around them. It's no big deal to have likes and dislikes, but I don't have the time or patience to play short order cook and I don't want them wandering around the kitchen for something to eat on their own...more dishes and mess at this point in our lives. So they eat what we eat, but I try to compromise and make at least a portion of our meal something I KNOW the kids like.

My son eats what we eat most of the time. He is actually an amazing eater. My husband does most of the cooking and sometimes my son will have something else because there are certain things he doesn't like. However, I'm actually the problem - I don't like sauces or spices. So most of the time my husband makes one thing for him and my son and something else for me. I don't eat cooked fish so if they have fish, I have eggs or a piece of chicken. If they have ribs or sausages (which I don't eat) - I'll have eggs or chicken. But if we all have chicken - my husband and son have it with BBQ sauce and I have garlic and salt. If we have steak, my husband and son have it blackened and I have it with garlic and salt.... If we have pasta, my husband and son have it with meat sauce and I have it with butter and salt. So you can make the same thing for everyone but make it a little different to accommodate different tastes. I don't believe you should force kids to eat something they don't like or make them clean their plates. hope this helps!

One of our kids (age 3) eats everything we eat (with a few exceptions, but she happily tries it each time). I have always fed her just what we eat as long as it's not too spicy or whatever. She likes almost everything...brussel sprouts, kale chips, salad, casseroles, asparagus, you name it. It's amazing! Our other child (age 8) is the pickiest eater. We started off giving him the same foods we eat but he gagged and hated everything even as a baby. He was a toddler who could not stand to eat most foods...bananas, cheese, avocado...all those normal toddler snacks were disgusting to him. He is extremely stubborn about it and is happy to just not eat if the food is not something he likes. He sometimes will not like foods he previously liked...and so he just does not eat dinner. It's so frustrating. So, yes, I make some exceptions for him bc I just want to get calories in him. So, if I'm making stir fry with brown rice and eggrolls. I will keep out plain chicken and plain broccoli for him. And I'll make a small pot of white rice. He has to take one bite of the stir fry, and each time he hates it...but then at least he has something to eat. I don't do this every dinner though and I don't make him kid foods (like a hot dog or chicken nuggets). I don't make it a battle. He knows he has to try one bite of foods he does not like. Most kids will find new foods they like by doing this over and over, but it does not seem to work with him! I say, make sure there is one thing at the table you know they like but don't make them a separate meal. I'm with your hubby to some extent...try to get them to eat what you eat. Hopefully your kids are not as impossible as my son.