I guess I'm left wondering what you mean by "guide?" What kids figure out from each other is generally pretty primitive, if not downright crude and thoughtless. Kids need rules, expectations, reminders, guidance, and reasonable consequences for the inevitable misbehavior, until they can demonstrate that they've "got it." Some kids able to reach that goal earlier and more consistently than others.
My version of guidance is to talk about rules and reasons for them, especially the Golden Rule, and live what I teach. If a child in my care breaks a rule or fails to cooperate, then I allow natural consequences to ensue, so the child feels the impact of what he has done. I don't see that spanking or taking away toys is ever really needed. Natural consequences, for me, pretty much replaces the need to punish, in a traditional sense. I swatted my daughter only twice, in a panic, to get her attention when she was about to do something dangerous. (I doubt those swats were necessary, but I momentarily lost my presence of mind.)
This worked very well for my daughter, who was a delightful child by everybody's account, and is now a polite, thoughtful, extremely responsible adult. This has worked very well for two generations of kids in my fairly liberal religious community (with the very small exception of a couple of autism-spectrum children, who need much more careful oversight).
And it's working well for my 5.5yo grandson, who is far more willingly obedient, cooperative, and appreciative than the average child I've seen in public. My grandson has never been spanked, and only occasionally earns a time-out, which he generally chooses for himself.
Which leads me to the best parenting tool I have ever used, a kind and practical little book called How to Talk So Kids Will Listen, and Listen So Kids Will Talk, by Faber and Mazlish. Among other things, it teaches how to make children part of the problem-solving process. And they can be remarkably good at it when brought into the process with respect for their native intelligence. And THAT is sorting out right from wrong!