When can children understand discipline? I want my daughter to be well rounded. She is nine months old when I tell her no she looks at me and sometimes stops sometimes she does not stop. I know she is still young but I want to make sure I start at the right time. Please Help!
My daughter is 15. One thing I have always tried to do is avoid the word "No". I would phrase my requests differently, like another poster mentioned... not "No", but "we don't throw toys", etc
I hate hearing moms saying "no" all the time. If child hears it over and over, they are not going to "get it".
Good luck!
She can understand that you want her to stop, but doesn't yet have the self control and memory to prevent her from doing it again right away. It takes a TON of repetition and patience before you'll see any fruits of your discipline efforts, but rest assured, you are helping her to understand when you are consistent about it.
at nine months, not so much. The best thing to do is to distract her with something she CAN do. Also, do yourself a favor and avoid as many battles as possible by putting out of reach what she shouldn't get into. When she's older, those things won't be tempting anyway. My 6 yr old doesn't try to eat my makeup or to pull out every pot and pan in the cupboards. No. He's into much cooler things now like legos.
Two good books are Jane Nelsen - Positive Discipline the first three years; Dr. Sears - the Baby Book and Dr. Harvey Karp - the Happiest Baby/Toddler on the Block. (two books)
From these books you can find that you will have strong tools to discipline and keep boundaries without losing your loving bonds and close attachment with your babe.
My son is 20 months and I think is just starting to 'get it'. Of course I'd tell him no or if he shouldnt be doing something when he was much younger... but like you said, he'd just stare at me. It's certainly a process and is about consistency. Now, when he does something wrong and suspects I'll say something, he'll say "No" himself as if admitting guilt.
I was told by some of my other mommy friends that around 2 is when they understand 'time outs', so don't expect much right now in terms of response from her. It's more about just teaching and training right now.
I think you're doing the right thing. She may not stop, but she does realize that you are paying attention. I think at this age, it is more about setting a standard than anything else. She does something, you say no, she does it anyway, you remove her from the situation. What she is learning is that you are in charge, and that is a wonderful lesson to teach!
Like another poster said, be consistent and one day you will reap the benefits...even if it doesn't always feel like it, lol!
I always try to save the word "no" for something big. Like if my daughter is throwing toys. Instead of no she'll hear "we don't throw toys" but if she's going for the stove she'll hear "NO" and since she doesn't hear it often she reacts to it.
At 9 months she def won't understand but with consistency she will get it and understand as she ages.
Your child is a baby. Even as toddlers, their little brains are processing so many things at once that they may hear you say 'Stop' or whatever- but their hands literally can't stop doing it right away.
I do believe in discipline and my son is extremely well behaved. But don't confuse spanking or shouting with teaching kids to behave. Your baby is still just that - A BABY. Enjoy this time- the terrible twos will be here soon enough!
Start now! If you wait until she is older than it will be harder. A lot of times (myself included) we look at the things our children do when they are little and it is funny and cute so we laugh and go on. Well those little darlings to get that momma thought this was funny the last time I did it and now she is mad at me. Of course at 9 months you have to simple with discipline. Tell her no and if she listens great if not tell her no again and redirect her from whatever she was doing to something positive.
They're learning all the time, but I don't know exactly when they "get it". Check out Love and Logic for toddlers, etc. It's a really great discipline style, all about teaching your kids to make the right choices. And you can start when they're old enough to make choices about colors, etc. It's very cool - I found the books at the library, and they were helpful.
She's a baby, relax and enjoy the wonders.
She may not understand yet, but the only way for her to learn is by hearing it over and over. I tell my 9 month old no all the time, and he doesn't really pay attention. But I tell him and then redirect. Hopefully someday it will click! :)
