Difficulty Raising My Two Year Old!

I've been there. Terrible twos. I don't really know what to tell you except be firm with her. Time out for bad behavior is in her room, period. If you're out use a stroller or shopping cart so you don't have to carry her. I used to lock myself in the bathroom for a moment of sanity. It helped, even with him banging on the door. As far as the gagging, my son did this too. Once he made himself throw up and I didn't react he realized he didn't like it and stopped.
I wish I had more to tell you. All kids go through some form of this and it does pass. Then they hit troublesome threes where they want to be on top of yu except when you need them near you and they want to run away. Hang in there. When all else fails get a babysitter just for a few hours and go out for coffee all by yourself with a good book. Take a bath while she naps. Take time out for you. It helps.

I can feel your frustration. My daughter is also a singer...and LOUD. I am trying to get my DISCOVERY TOYS business (www.kooltoys1.com)brached out into daycares...and I have been making calls. She will come and talk to me or sing a LOUD song. I love her so much but I do need ALONE time too. I try to go into the other room and like your daughter she will follow me too. Sometimes I just have to laugh b/c she is so silly. You are NOT alone. It is hard too because my son was not like this...don't get me wrong he seems to be up my butt lately too. Just wanted you to know you are NOT alone. I know this is a phase and I keep TRYING to remember that. It WILL get better!

Hi O., I just wanted to say that just maybe your 2 yr old is feeling 'insecure' for some reason. Were there recent changes at home? A new home? A new room? A parent / Dad away? Also, children very much take their lead from the caretaker/parent. If she senses your stress ("struggling to juggle everything in my life") & very much depending on you; sensing that/your stress could somehow have an affect on her. Almost sounds like shes following you around as if you're going somewhere without her?
"Abandonment" I've read about where a child feels insecure that even the least sepeartion from a parent (could simply be running out to the store or going to work & leaving the child w/a sitter) the child feels 'abandoned" & in turn will follow you around fearing this seperation again. Now it could also be for attention .. tho somehow it sounds a little more then just that. You should check w/her doctor or you can 'google' the question; they're lots of sights that offer physcologists advice that I've found helpful. Good luck & god bless.

This is late in response, but I've found that usually when a child is clingy like that they are looking for comfort & positive attention but will take what ever attention they can get from things like tantrums, acting out, etc. When my son - 2 yrs. - gets "momified," something else is usually going on. Mostly it's that he's tired. I just finished reading Happiest Toddler on the Block" by Harvey Karp, and I have to say that it has been a godsend in dealing with tantrums. It is a quick read and very enjoyable. It helps in understanding why toddlers act the way they do and lets you get back to enjoying your baby. I would highly recommend it. Also good was "How to talk so your kids will listen and Listen so your kids will talk", but it is better for preschoolers and up. Hope this helps.

Hi O., I feel for you when I read your request! My daughter is going to be 3 in Sept. and we recently got out of a rough "terrible 2" phase with her. Not only did she gag herself when she didn't get her way but she would vomit all over herself, her bed, everything. I talked to her pedi and he said basically that it is not that uncommon and it usually wont last more than a month at most. Once she figures out that it's not getting her her way she'll stop it. I feel bad for you because you are by yourself. My husband is a wonderful father and spends a lot of time with our daughter which is a Godsend for me. Do you have anyone that can babysit for you for a couple hours so you could have some Mommy time? Sounds like you really need a break. I wish you all the best - hang in there!

Don't worry, we all go through some anxiety with our children as they grow a little older. Just remember, children pick up on your emotions. Maybe when you get upset by her actions, she gets more upset, cause mommy is upset. Try thinking about all of the good times you have with her, and how your life would be if you did not have your precious angel. Good luck, K.

Is she seperated from you a lot i.e. daycare, babysitter?Babies may act out b/c they want their mothers attention or maybe theres other things wrong.Instead of getting frustrated (which usually makes the situation worse)have you tried to figure out what triggers the tantrums? tired, hungry, bored? Children don't know the words to express how their feeling and that's when you get the tantrums and outburts.I find that when I devote an hour a day to spend one on one playing or reading or some other activity with my 3yr old twins (no other distractions)that their more content and I'm able to leave the room and take care of other things w/o them freaking out.Kids don't like surprises so explain brief)things to them so they always know what's coming next.It's a big world that their trying to make sense of and they look to us to help them figure things out, and by talking to them helps them understand and eliminate some of that anxiety.Hang in there...it only get's better!

Hi O.,

Honestly don't give in to you and honestly stay away from yelling because it makes them just cry more. Try to get her attention to something else like getting down on the floor and playing with her or some toys. Is she around other kids? I never really had that problem because when I started to bring my daughter to daycare I cut that in the butt really quick. It was hard but once my daughter saw the other kids and she took her mind of me it was okay. I never sneek away but I always give her a kiss and she is okay. She cries and cries but never throws up but I know how frustrating it could be. Especially for me at night she will not stay with my husband so trust me I know what your going through. Just give it some time and it will get better until another circumstance.

Hold on honey the rides not over at two. My three year old is screaming as i type this to you. Not to depress you but it's not only terrible two's. I have a double whammy because i also have a hormonal 12 year old. Did you ever think a 12 year old and a three year old would fight like cats and dogs? Well they do. As soon as i walk in the house after working all day i now become a referee. Just remember it can only get better. Children are a blessing even though they are a pain in the a** at times. You sound a little on edge and need to come up with a solution when your daughter drives you nuts. Sometimes you just have to put down what you are doing and give your child a big hug and tell them you love them. Or get down on the ground and play. With our busy lives we sometimes forget to give our children the proper one on one attention they need and desire. I really can relate with you because after a days work,coming home, cleaning up the house, feeding,bathing and putting the kids to bed (and then dealing w/your biggest baby, i thing everyone can figure out who that is!) when is there time for me?!? And you being a single mom (which i was for years w/my first daughter) it's even harder. Just remember (& this is hard to practice but..) the experts say the more you yell at a toddler the more they shut you out and the worse there behavior becomes. Good luck to you