hello. i'm 20 yrs old with a 10 month baby and i started to develope depression like a month or so ago. well ok my boyfriend has 3 jobs and so i've been sitting at home all alone all day. i know he is just trying to pay the bills so i feel like i should lay off but its hard. yesturday was his last day at one of his jobs. he works at a bar! and he told me he was gonna try to close up early. well when i called at midnight he had a full bar. i got mad! started a fight with him! im not even really sure why! maybe i just want him home so bad i start fights with him when he's not. maybe i'm stressed! i just dont know... if anyone knows what i can do, please help me out! i went online to find a online depression group this but that didnt work out to well.
Are you able to get out of your house at all? Going places away from home helps alot! Also you could try him only working one job and you getting a job opposite him. Its not fair for him to miss her first "things" either, working 2 or 3 jobs. That way you both get out of the house, have two incomes and dont have to pay for a sitter. It would be less stress on both of you.
Good luck
S.
Definitely call your doctor. He/she can check for any chemical imbalances or hormonal issues that might be hidden. Second, please don't be afraid to talk to people you know. Having the support of family and friends is so important. You have had a major life change with becoming a mom and now missing your boyfriend. Always communicate with him so he knows you are not feeling right about your situation (not to put him on the defensive, but to help him understand why you are snappy with him). Managing all of the stress you have, can be very hard, so maybe you can look into specific support groups for young moms. Please keep us posted because I know I will worry about you, even without knowing you personally :-)
maybe it wouldn't hurt to talk to a doctor, but really it doesn't mean you need medicated for an imbalance or some other disorder just because you are feeling depressed! really, look at your situation. you have every reason to feel down! you miss interaction with people your age, especially your man. your job is very demanding, especially with a daughter of 10 mos. you're probably tired of the day to day monotony of "housewifehood" and at 20 years old you probably don't have a lot of friends in your situation that can relate. i know because i've been there.(i AM there!) the only thing i can recommend is getting out of the house. take your daughter out to a store and just walk around if thats all you can do. spring will be here soon, that will help things too!
Like the others stated, I would see your Doctor. Second, I would try and find a play group near you. GREAT support group and will get you interact with other mothers. Get out of the house, even if you just walk around the Mall (since it’s been so cold!) It sounds like there is a lot of stress in both of your lives. Try to make a date night, since you are on a budget like the rest of us...Try surprising your man with an indoor picnic. Put baby to bed, clear the living room buy a bottle of wine, get some cheese and crackers, put out some candles, AND don't forget to ware something he would love! Try to have fun with him when he's at home. Good Luck, you're not the only one out there!!!
first things first go see your doctor, talk to him there are a lot of good treatments out there, second get out of the house, take your little girl to a play date or something and just get out for a bit, it will help, i went through it with my first two kids and it is terrible and it only gets worse if left alone, the stress jsut builds and builds untill every little thing that anyone does is cause for a fight and no one is happy, and while i knwo you want to be there for your little girl some ppl just need to work, they need the interaction and the time away to be the best parent they can be and if it makes you feel less guilty about leaving her then by all means find a very part time job, like 10 or so hours a week where you can spend time with adults and be you and not just mommy, it took untill my kids started school for me to want to be home full time, i would just go crazy with no one to tlak to all day and nothing really to do that didn't involve my kids, now things are so busy i dont' think i could go back to work if i wanted to there isn't enough time in the day. but good luck and take care.
I also agree about talking to your Dr, but I also wonder if you are on any medications that could be causing it. Birth Control always does it to me. I will be fine on a brand for "x amount of months" and then it hits me like a ton of bricks. I will be June Clever one moment and Andrea Yates the next. Also, when I am having a really bad day I just pack the kids up and go visiting. My family lives in the next county from me and we will make an all day event out of it; my husband works long hours also. The car drive can sometimes be difficult, but by the time I get home and the kids are wore out I am better, at least for the day. And I take a good book with me b/c it is my time to relax while the kids play with the relitives. Good Luck!
