Debating About Another Child

i kind of have a similar problem. I have two kids. 3 and 1. My family doesn't want me to have anymore, but I want another one. Everyone on here told me that it's just my husband and my decision. My opinion, despite how many kids you have, if you think you can handle it, go for it and good luck.

I married a man who had 5 children from a "previous disaster". We still wanted our own child, and both of us were college students. Despite the initial criticism from the family, we are now the proud parents to a 20 month old daughter. Do what your heart tells you to do.

From reading your request, it sounds like you have already made your decision you are just afraid of what other people are going to say. There are always going to be people who disagree with your decision, so you should be prepared to defend it or ignore their protests.
I also must add to make sure you want another child for the right reasons. You didn't mention your age, but it sounds like you and your husband have a lot on your plate and adding a pregnancy and baby will only add more. Will waiting a few years really make that much of a difference? You mentioned all of your babies going off to school, could the thought of your babies "growing up" be part of the urgency you are feeling?
Good luck with your decision.

S.

Hey T., it's D. and I say this....if you wait until you can afford another one then you will never have another one!! I mother told me a long time ago that it is never a good time to have a child where money is concerned!! LOL... If you 2 want another one then have another one and do it now why the other ones are not to much older and while you can enjoy some time with this one while the others are at school!!! How are things going??I know you have enough love for all of them so go for it!!! Good Luck and I guess you want another little girl to even it out with the 2 boys??? haha...let me know how things are and what you decide and oh yes, you can never listen to your family because they don't live in your house so they don't know what all goes on and you know they always think they know best but you know what??? They don't you do!!!

Well weigh the pro's and cons. For one thing.. once you have three kids, a fourth won't even hardly be noticable, but do you have time to devote to a newborn? How are you going to manage taking care of three young kids already, a house, college, a newborn plus try to fit in homework and sleeping?
Examine your reasons for wanting this baby. Is it because you want to share the miracle of life with your new husband? Could it be a way to bond you two together? Could you want to have one now before you start on your career or possibly because if you fail in college, you can chalk it up to being a tired new mommy? I know it sounds strange but a fear of failure could be making you set yourself up for failure.
Now why do you care what other people say about you having another child. If you can budget well and he makes enough imcome to support all of you, then why is it anyone else's business? I'm sure you wouldn't deliberately have a child that you won't be able to feed, clothe and shelter. You're obviously intelligent or you wouldn't be on college.
Just make sure you and your husband have another baby for the right reasons. You didn't say how old you were but I'm guessing you're in your mid-twenties at least. That leaves you 10 more years at least to have another baby without fear of problems. You could always wait until you're established in your chosen career for a while and then have a child when your life isn't so hectic.
I waited 9 years before I had another child and it's so much easier the 2nd time around. There's no big rush to have another 'right now' is there? Just don't have one until you and your husband are both absolutely sure you're ready for one.
Best of luck to you and congradulations on going back to college.

Well, your "a little about me" message says a lot. Your trying to "manage" a household? Regardless of what you want you don't sound ready. Why are you sweating this? Even if you started trying today there's no guarantee that you'll get pregnant on your schedule. If you didn't know the answer you won't be so defensive. You have a responsibility as well to your family regardless of what you want. You might be able to deal with it but are your other kids ready to share you a bit more?

I only have two kids, four and an infant. My four year old helps me sooooooooo much. He holds bottles or the pacifier when we're in the car. He fetches anything I need and always checks her for spitup and wipes it off when I'm cooking or cleaning. He was old enough to understand that a baby was coming and he was totally excited. When she cries for a while he knows she can't talk so he is very patient and understanding with her rather than most younger children who are upset or frustrated with a crying baby. You may want to think about what ages it would be easiest on you to have another. Just be careful not to overburden yourself. Good luck.

T., the only advice I have is this:
Think of your current children FIRST. That means setting aside time to evaluate a few very pertinent things:
Do you have the time to dedicate to them NOW to teach, train, etc.
Do you have 529 plans set up for their very real very future college plans?
Do you contribute to those plans every month? If not, why?
Also evaluate the "disaster" you mentioned and how another child would impact that situation. Be very honest, and take your loved ones concerns seriously. I have found older moms (grandparents, older coworkers) seem to have the best foundation for looking back and knowing...what they would have done...what they would not have done.
I suppose my concern is financial, which may be "worldly" and "unimaginative"; however, children that exist NOW deserve the very best, and if you are not financially secure to care for their needs, do not risk "disaster" a second time.
;)
V.

Kids are very expensive and a lot of responsibility. I would definately think about the other 3 children and their futures before deciding to have another child.

hay i say if you can afford it go for it i have 3 kids and another is on the way!! my other 3 children are all in school so it will be easier this time around for me!! but i say if this is what you and your husband want then go for it!!!