Daughter Wants to Use the Potty All the Time

They usually go through this when they learn to use the potty. Like all phases, it will pass. If you indulge her, it will pass faster.

E.,

I have three grown daughters and one 4 year old granddaughter - all of the girls "used" going to the potty for praise. Now that she has "figured" out the potty thing, keep praising the success, but maybe try and shift the focus to something else.
She may also just need some more time to learn to "hold" it a little, but from there you will ascend to holding it sooo long she pees trying to get to the bathroom. When learning to use the potty an "accident" will affect children differently, some get very upset and some it does not bother, it kind of sounds like your little one is trying very hard not to have an accident as well.

Have you experienced the having to potty in EVERY public bathroom yet? That too is normal.

It would also be normal for her to regress a little when your new baby is born.

Typically these issues will iron themselves out with a little time and patience.

In the meantime - GOOD LUCK and congratulations on number two!

N.

That totally sucks. I hate it when they want to use the potty to get out of time out. I give them a few days and see if I am sure they are doing this and then I just say no. I'd rather risk an accident than turn it into a power struggle. It is a phase that should pass.

However... If she is actually having bowel movements in the middle of the night I would NOT stop her. Bowel movements should never be held under any circumstances. That's just asking for issues in that area. No one can MAKE themselves do that as a power struggle.

Suzi

My daughter used to do the same thing. I would read to her while she was trying to go poop, and since she loved me reading to her, she'd pretend she needed to poop all the time - she would work me to make me sit by her potty and read to her forever. It is a control issue. Little kids have very little in their lives that they have control over, and the really smart ones figure out that eating and going potty are two things that parents have absolutely no control over. You can't force a kid to eat and you can't stop a kid from going potty or not going potty. My youngest daughter always wanted to go potty in public restrooms - every time we went anywhere.

But now that you know what she's doing, you can take control of the situation. Of course she's excited about this new going potty thing, and most of this will pass with time. But you can tell her we go potty one time before bed and that's it - tell her before she goes potty the first time that that's it. One time before bed. And then tell her if she can go all night without having to use the potty, you'll have a reward for her in the morning. Tell her big girls sleep all night without having to use the potty. (Of course, if you don't think she can be dry all night, that's a different story.) As you redirect the potty situation, try to give her special attention in other areas - try something new she hasn't done before, a new game or project. At this age, it's all about accomplishments. She's succeeded in the potty training, received her kudos, and now you can move on to some other accomplishment.

it is a control issue; it has a lot to do with your second baby coming. don't force it...she'll quickly learn that it's not paying off. let her go, and when she doesn't "go" she doesn't get rewarded, when she does, she does. i think all kids do the constant potty going when they really get the hang of it.

Both our kids went through this. It was really bad with our daughter. I used to sit with her or read to her while she was going. When the control issue came up, I would try to dress her in clothes she could pull down (or up) herself and when she needed to go I would just tell her 'OK, go ahead and use the potty.' Or if she still needs help, you can get her situated, leave the room, and tell her to call you when she is done. Once she isn't getting so much attention by going to the potty, she'll decide she'd rather be doing something else than sitting in an empty bathroom by herself.

We also had an issue with our daughter just letting out enough urine so that she didn't feel the urge to go anymore. If your daughter is going everytime, this may be the issue. We just told our daughter to be sure and empty her bladder and explained how to 'squeeze out all the pee-pee'. This helped.

Be aware that this problem will likely get worse when the baby comes, so the more progress you can make before baby arrives, the better. Good Luck!

Hi E.,
My daughter (and my nephew) did the same thing around three years old. I took her to the Dr thinking that she had a UTI, but she didn't. The Dr said it's a developmental thing and that a lot of children do it. I Googled it, and sure enough there are tons of articles about it. She did it for a few weeks, and then just stopped. Good luck!

My daughter went through the having to go to the bathroom all the time, I thought about taking her to see a specialist because most of the time when she said she had to go we would go and there would be nothing. we would be at the store and she would "have to go" 3 times. She had now grown out of it and I think you daughter will to. My daughter will still get up during the night to go but it is only once a night and not all the time. I was told it is a phase they go through. And remember it is new to her. S. mother of madison 5

My 2 year old daughter does the same thing. She uses potty as a way to get out of sitting in church, sitting at ball games, riding in her car seat etc. She actually hasn't used it to get out of bed yet, but I'm sure that's coming. Can your 3 yo go unassisted? If so, I would just allow her to go, then go immediately back to bed. Don't give her extra attention and maybe the fun will wear off. I know how it is such a dillema because you don't want to not allow them to use the potty if need be. I always take my duaghter when she asks to go but make sure she sits on the potty for a little while whether she goes or not. Sometimes she changes her mind the minute we get to the restroom and says she doesn't need to go but I still make sure she sits for a while, and washes her hands when we're done. I'm sorry that I don't have much advice for you but just wanted you to know you're not alone. I hope you get some good advice b/c I'll be checking in from time to time.

since you are expected soon, your daughter may be feeling jealous of the baby on the way. You and your husband put a lot of importance on using the potty so she knows your attention will be there if she needs to use the potty. I'm sure that's not the only time you give attention to her. May try to put the same excitment and attention on another activity she already does or you want her to do more of; her playing with a certain toy, picking up after herself... Does she do it more when your husband is home? maybe she wants more attention from her dad? She sees you all day. I'm also a stay at home mom of a 2 1/2 yr old girl. When her dad comes home she acts a little different trying to get his attention.

Good Morning E., Isn't it fun when they finally get it and figure out how to use it against us.. :)) Yes dear your not alone. It took forever for one of our gr son's to go poop in toilet. Until he found out he couldn't go to pre-school if he couldn't go poop in potty. So the first time he pooped in potty his daddy rewarded him with a toy john Deere tractor. Then he stopped for a few days. Then thought he would get another toy if he did it again. NO way. That was this summer. He has been going by himself lately then letting me know to wipe his hinny.

He did the I have to potty to his parents several times at bed time. Once in a while still does. Some nights if he wet in his pull up at night he got up and puts on big boy underwear and goes back to bed. He was getting up dry for over 2 wks so they quit the pull ups. Now he is back to wetting once in a while.

He has such large BM's that he tries not to go until he can't hold it in any longer and does this little shuffle walk. I have tried telling him not to try and hold it, as it can hurt his hinny if he keeps doing that. Every once in a while he has a tad bit of blood on the tissue when cleaning him up. We have even tried pear juice to soften stool.

I think all Kids try this E., not to go to bed or the Drink of water ploy. When Corbin does go poop during the day now I give him HIGH 5's Call momma at work, and he gets a mini chocolate bar. He knows he can't have it unless he really goes.

Keep reinforcing your bed time routine, potty, drink kisses hugs night night.

God Bless you and your family, Best of everything with your soon to be new little angel.

K. Nana of 5