M.H.
While I'm not married, I've been with the man in my life for almost 13 yrs. (close enough though)now & I've done the whole get out thing for years!!! I would get angry and the easiest thing for me to do was to tell him to get out, and the end result would be me wishing I'd never said it!!!! I not only punished myself, but my children, and everyone around us (because he'd have to find somewhere to live).... The longest was for a few months!!!! I got a big slap in the face when we moved into a house that he bought & he told me to get out.. Which left me with no where to go, but of course I couldn't go & he didn't make me (THANK GOD)!!!!!
But, it's a wound that needs to heal and make take time for him.... Because, men have feelings just the same as we do and we usually don't see it that way!!!!
As for the counseling, if you think you need it and it would help you do so.... There is nothing wrong with trying to work on a problem, or trying to better yourself. Even if things don't workout with you and your husband, it'll help you!!!! It will also help you transition should things not work out, and be good for your child!!!!
You need to think of you and your child at the moment since right now he's cooling off, with his ex....
I've been cheated on once , and I have forgiven (but never forgotten)..... But, if you forgive you can't use it later to throw in their face!!!! So, should you decide to take him back (if he decides to come home), there is nothing wrong with that!!!!! It's all in how you see the situation.... As long as he's not going back and forth between the two of you all the time. I think cheating once is forgivable, but more is not..... However it's YOUR LIFE!!!!!
Just remember you have a child to live for!!!! That is the most important thing right now, your child... Keep that BEAUTIFUL BABY ahead of everything else!!!!!
I really hope everything works out for you, and I hope I was of some help to you!!!!