Cussing at 2 1/2 Yrs Old???!

Why can't they discipline at school?! That's horrible. The behavior is unacceptable and he needs to learn. Discipline is simply teaching right from wrong - surely the school can do that! I can see not punishing, but not disciplining? I"d switch schools.

If he was older you could do a chart like thing where if he acts up at school you withhold a privilege at home. However, 2.5 years old is much too young for that. By the time he'd get home he would've forgotten what he did and it would be very hard to make that connection.

I'd talk with the teachers and start looking at other schools. It may be something relatively little like cussing now, but if they won't discipline for that there's a good chance they won't discipline for bigger/worse behaviors as the kids get older.

Be careful; tell your son it is wrong to say, but don't make too big a deal out of it. Chances are it's something new and it will wear off.

Dear A.?,

May I ask why your 2 1/2 year old is going to "school?" Best bet is to get him out of the environment where he is learning that and bring him back home where the rules are enforced (by a spanking if necessary.) You might pick up a copy of James Lehman's "Total Transformation" system - http://www.thetotaltransformation.com

This may be a good time for you to think about home schooling your children. The Robinson system is an excellent way to do it and it is self teaching so you don't get stuck being mommy and teacher. http://www.oism.org/s32p28.htm

God Bless.

S.

Love him, love him, looooove him!
When he says those things, stop whatever you're doing, get down on his level, and talk to him eye to eye. Show him that you're really listening and concerned about what he is feeling. It's a testing the water and trying out his influence thing. If he sees you're really concerned--not asserting more power over him--he'll pick up on those concerns.

I found with my kids that just stopping in the middle of their tantrum, meltdown, misbehavior, etc. if I just held them and loved them for a moment without saying a thing, that always stopped them dead in their tracks and reversed their behavior.

Good luck. . .it will pass!

J.

My two year old picked up the word d*mnit somewhere. I can't figure out where! She doesn't go to school and I know the babysitter doesn't use that kind of language. My husband and I are guilty of the occasional slip, so she could have gotten it from us I guess. When she started saying it, I just ignored it. It worked, sort of. She wasn't saying it to be a smart aleck or anything, it was just another word to her. I finally told her that it wasn't a nice word and we shouldn't use it anymore. That pretty much took care of it. Since she wasn't saying it to be mean, I didn't want to make a big deal out of it. Now that you've done time outs, he KNOWS that it's a bad word and is probably saying it to get your attention, be funny, or to test his boundaries. Just stick to your discipline plan. Also, talk to his teacher. If he breaks the rules at school, punish him at home. Make sure she sends home a report when he does something wrong.

First, you seem to be confused as to what "discipline" means. They are using a form of discipline at school. I think you mean "punishment" is something they can't do, although they can with time-outs and being sent to see the principal.
And actually, their way is going to work better in this instance. Punishing a child that age for saying a word that they have no concept of a meaning is totally useless. You are over-reacting and he just sees that he gets your attention when he uses certain words. At such a young age they don't understand "good words vs. bad words". In fact, when it comes down to it, there are no bad words, just bad intentions behind the words. So, disciplining a child for using a word they don't understand is futile.
At his age, the last thing he wants to do is upset you. So, whenever he uses a "bad word" sit him down and tell him "It makes me very angry when you use that word. Please use ______ instead." And take away whatever he cussed about. Trying to get a toy from a friend? Take the toy away. Mad because he isn't getting his way, put him in time-out.
Yelling, screaming, and hitting are poor ways to discipline, especially a 2-year-old who doesn't understand why he's being disciplined and won't still for some time.

I agree with some others that there is some confusion about "discipline"- most schools do have some form of discipline such as time out or redirection. Some may suggest spanking, and may even claim that this is effective- but there is absolutely no research EVER that has proven spanking to be an effective method of punishment (it is not discipline, it is punishment). The research that does exist overwhelmingly agrees that physical punishment will only reinforce fear and physical reactions to situations. Anyway- you might try to tell your son that there are some words that he may hear people use when they don't know what words to use, but that he is such a smart boy who knows lots of words so he doesn't need to rely on those kinds of words. Although, frankly, at such a young age, this may be over his head and just ignoring/not overreacting to the bad words may be best. He has no idea what he saying- he only knows the attention that he gets when he says certain things. Your son will encounter people his whole life who will show him behaviors that you may disagree with- you simply can't shelter kids from everything. We have to equip them with the tools, knowledge, and self-esteem necessary to make better choices. Good luck!

Volunteer at his day care - see if this new little boy is cussing up a storm, and if so, confront HIS parent about it. When I was working at a daycare we had a 2 year old who would tell the teacher f**k you *insert another word for a female dog* like it was nothing, and his mom thought it was hilarious, until other moms started to go out of their way to pick up their children when she did and read her the riot act in the parking lot. Then she started working with her kid and his language, and with everyone else working with their children, the cursing eventually stopped.