Constant Worrying

Susan,
When my child was born I, too stressed over everything. Like you, i was unable to controll my thoughts (which I usually could do). They would always go to "the worst case scenerio". Over time it did ease up and I heard from other moms they many of them went through it. Time alone, walks and a lot of deep breathing helped. What I found out later was there is Postpartum stres/anxiety disorder. I had only heard of depression, and I wasn't depressed so I never looked into it. Look into it and talk to you therapist about it. Short term meds may help along with relatxation tools. It will get better, but help along the way is a good thing.

Religious answer: Worrying is a sin, b/c you are showing a distrust in God.

AA answer: Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair - it might feel comfortable, but it doesn't get you anywhere.

My answer: Worrying is the epitome of self-centeredness. You ain't that powerful. You can't control events, so let them be what they will be. They're going to happen whether you worry or not.

How did I stop worrying? I changed the channel in my head. That little worry voice that pipes up - I don't answer him anymore. When I hear him, I go do something else (iron, wash, walk, tv). Anything but play "what if".

After a few weeks of being ignored, the little voice diminishes and doesn't try to create new worries as often.

Well, the beauty of expecting the WORST case scenario, is when it DOESN'T happen, you're pleasantly surprised, right? Which is pretty much every time?

So glad you're seeing someone for it. Sad to miss the good stuff worrying about the bad stuff, you know?

Enjoy them.

:)

Glad you're seeing a therapist!

Let me tell you, everyone worries to an extent. But it's a personal choice not to live in fear. It ruins you! Think of all those 'what if's!!' and then look back and tell me how many times those bad things really happened.

Chances are, it's seldom to never.

So going forward, realize that yeah, bad things happen, HOWEVER, you need to make the personal decision not to let it control your life.

For instance, my son is sticking a small, fake plastic palm tree up his nose. I'm not freaking out like WHAT IF HE FALLS AND IT JAMS INTO HIS BRAIN?!... nope, I laughed, told him he's silly, reminded him that's a bad idea, took it away, and redirected him to something less 'dangerous'. Problem solved, no freak out occurred, everyone's fine.

Take little baby steps like that, because practice makes perfect, and soon, not worrying will be second nature :)

Worrying to a degree is normal, but not constantly to the point of being obsessed. Our minds do go to the worst case scenario a lot of times, like for that 15 seconds you can't put your eyes on your child at the playground. Keep working with your therapist, but know that a certain amount of worry is normal.

Updated

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Worrying is taking a concern to a level that says, "God is not able to take care of our business", or that "God doesn't care about us enough to protect us". BUT, I believe we have been given an internal warning system that brings to light anything that could be a major risk for our children. If we read about something that killed a child or landed a child in the hospital, we should file that away to help us prevent that situation in our own lives. My family thinks I am obsessed about these things. I prefer to consider myself careful.

I think it all depends on if we can pray about a situation and let it go, or if we get that constant queasy feeling in our stomach. I hate that up in my throat feeling. I've had to work on this area a lot myself.

If you can't get past this with the help of a therapist, you should go to a doctor and try a little bit of medication. Otherwise, it will rule your life.

So sorry.
Dawn

It is because, perhaps, that it is the "unknown" that is making you worry so much, and these are your children.

But you also need to, let your kids, live and be able to not worry all the time, because you are worrying.
Maybe it will help you to curb that tendency, to realize that... if you are always worrying about them, then they probably get your vibes and will get affected by it too. Maybe becoming worry warts too, or becoming afraid to enjoy things, or becoming unable to cope with life's daily things.
I am sure, you don't want to "condition" your kids... to become worry warts either???? Or, do you want them to bear your worries... upon their tiny shoulders?? They should not have to "worry"... about their Mommy.

There is always worrying, when you are a Mom.
But its good you are seeing someone.

You are not alone, at all! I just recently started getting help for my anxiety. I too worry all the time about my kids, that someone will hurt them, that an earthquake will hit and i wont be able to help them, that i will crash while driving with them, that they will be diagnosed with cancer (my kids are also healthy) and not only do i worry about them but about my husband and family. It's really been taking a toll on me so finally i reached out for help. And the one thing that has made a HUGE impact on how i feel is that I stopped watching the news, like i've done every morning since i was 15! I feel that my anxiety has gone down alot, not all the way but alot. I stay away from bad stuff on the internet too because i get too emotionally attached to the victims even if i dont know them. Anywho i just wanted you to know that you are not alone, and it just shows how much you love your children and that you dont want anything to happen to them.

I don't know how old your children are, but do you ever want them to trust you? You know, like "stop running on that ice!" Boom, they fall and you kiss their boo boo anyway, but wish they would have trusted you? Well, God wants you to trust Him too. Only God is perfect and trustworthy, and we are not. We will make mistakes, but it is true that he gives us a special grace to know what to do when things are serious. He loves them way more than we do and has their best interest at heart. I know worry though and it can be deeply rooted and hard to overcome. If it isn't one thing, it's another. Just take it one day at a time and maybe find some biblical verses that confirm God's trustworthiness.
Blessings,
M.

Sounds just like me! I have generalized anxiety disorder. I worry about life threatening illnesses for no good reason. I am currently medicated, but am seeking therapy as well. Hang in there...it is a rough road.

No. I would not let myself worry constantly. It does no good.