Cleaning Bedrooms...

Updated on May 30, 2012
A.G. asks from Orem, UT
19 answers

How do you work cleaning bedrooms with your kids? Are you of the opinion that it is 'their space...their mess' and they can have it however they like it? Or do you insist it be cleaned...perhaps before friends/tv/whatever? And why do you do it the way you do?

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So What Happened?

Thanks for the thoughts! Our kids are fairly young (almost 2, 4, 6, and 8). At this point...It has to be cleared enough that I can walk around it in the middle of the night without getting hurt...it has to be clean to have friends in it...etc. If I keep things reasonably de-cluttered - it works fine...but sometimes I wonder if I should be doing it different. I LOVE the idea of the toy fairy! We do a Mr. Gulp every so often...kind of the same thing...I haven't done it in a while tho'...I should bring him out! Thanks again!!

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A.C.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I require that their rooms be picked up once each day. When the kids get home from school, they grab a snack, do their homework, and I require them to do their chores before going out to play with friends. This works best because by the end of the night, they are tired and ornery and more likely to put up a fuss about chores. Anyhow, I give them three jobs to do. Usually they are put away all laundry, pick up bedroom, and something else like take out trash, unload dishwasher, sweep, etc. I have 3 kids ages 9, 7 and 4. The 4 year old does jobs too but usually easier ones like put away any laundry that can be folded (she is too short to hang things up in closet), take mail out to mailbox, empty garbage cans, bring dirty clothes to laundry rm.
Cleaning rooms includes all dirty clothes down to laundry room, toys put in correct bins, garbages empty, clean clothes put away.Vacuum once a week. I do not require beds to be made; they have bunk beds and it is pretty hard to make up the beds. About once a month I will go in and help them do a deep cleaning and get rid of all the hoarded McDonalds toys, erasers and junk they bring home from school, etc. I do not care about the rooms looking like show rooms or anything, because by the next day they are going to be messy again, but picking them up daily keeps it from truly getting horrid and teaches them a bit of personal responsibility.

2 moms found this helpful

C.W.

answers from Lynchburg on

Hi having fun-

I think the GREATEST invention ever made (well...ONE of them anyway) is/was the door.

I can close it if I do not wish to see my kiddos mess.

I can take it OFF the hinges if there is 'inappropriate' activity at any time! (I wear a tool belt - so always have a hammer and screw driver on hand...NOT)

I do require laundry in baskets...or in line for wash.

I do require help setting table, cleaning up table...bathrooms clean...common areas assistance with cleaning/straightening...

BUT "THEIR ROOMS"...

I generally just close the door...

My kiddos are older though...15....to 23 (and several of them no longer at home).

Best luck!
michele/cat

2 moms found this helpful

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

My kids are 5 and 9.
My 5 year old needs help.
My 9 year old does not.
Sure, it is their space.
But they also appreciate when I give them organizational tips. Tips. I do not dictate to them, that they do it *my* way. But that it is picked up, the best they can per their ages. They can place things where they want.
And then as they get older, they continue to learn cleaning "tips" from me, or by seeing me clean too. For me, the key thing is to "learn" how to clean and problem solving about it too. Via their own input and reasoning for cleaning and organizing.

Sure, before friends come over we tidy up. Or not. All our friends and my kids' friends know us well. No one is an anal clean freak. We all have kids. Our homes are evident of that. I do not make things tidy as a "museum" before friends come over. But it is neatened. Not overly though. It is, home.

Sometimes we or they do it daily. Or not. But certainly when things get a bit strewn all over. Then things are tidied up.
I am not a hammer about it.

4 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I cared more when they were younger, when I was still spending time in there, reading stories, snuggling, putting away laundry, that kid of thing.
Now that they are all teenagers I close the door and let THEM decide how they want to live. Surprisingly, my middle child, who is my MOST difficult, is actually the neatest, cleanest and most organized out of the three! Who knew? lol :)

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

In my house they have a set standard. No clothes on the floor, bed sort of made up, clothes put away. Toys can be piled on the shelves, etc...if they have less than this that's fine. BUT they cannot go play with friends, have anyone over, don't get rewards, etc...no punishment but lots of fun and rewards if it is done when something comes up. And if it's not clean then you can bet I instigate something happening so they get the natural consequences of not getting to go since their work is not done.

2 moms found this helpful

F.H.

answers from Phoenix on

My husband is more strict about it than I am, although I agree that their rooms should be "picked up". He checks every morning to make sure their beds are made and nothing is thrown on the floor. Every time I want to downsize it and organize it then I go in there with them and do it. My 16 yo is spec needs and she was raised by her neat freak dad so she keeps her room organized and cleaned on her own. My 9 yo does better at it than my 12 yo, she is a mess and we have to keep on top of her and I have to go in there and literally make her throw trash that she has thrown on the ground in the trash can. My husband thinks it shows respect and pride of your home/room to keep it clean. I sort of feel like its their space so it doesn't have to be perfect. So we sort of meet in the middle. So they basically have to make their beds every morning and keep the floor picked up.

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D.B.

answers from Dallas on

My kids' room is their space and their mess, but they cannot have it anyway they like it. I am not too strict though. Their blankets and pillows have to be on their beds (fort making is a frequent occurance!), but beds don't have to be made. Dirty clothes must be in hamper and clean clothes put away. Once a week my older 2 boys must remove all toys and put them away in the playroom (doesn't get too bad because playdates are confined to the playroom, living room, and backyard). My kiddos don't spend too much time in their bedroom because we have the playroom. I require them to keep the floor picked up because otherwise it would be a safety hazard! Plus, it's a life skill. And finally, because it just feels better to have a clean space to sleep in. Chaos in their room makes bedtime more chaotic. Even the kids feel the difference between a messy room and a clean room.

1 mom found this helpful

J.P.

answers from Lakeland on

I expect my daughter and step daughter to keep their rooms clean. I always offer to help if they need it. I can't stand clothes, toys etc. all over the place, I was not raised that way.

My daughter is 5 and if she takes a toy out she must put it away before taking out something else including when friends are over. This helps keep it from getting messy. She has also always had a clothes hamper and I have never had to ask her to put dirty clothes in it, she has always seen me do it so she does it too.

1 mom found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Dallas on

I am the neat freak some of you are referring to. :) I can't help it; it's just who I am. Fortunately I married a man that is also quite tidy, and we have one son that is every bit as concerned about neatness as I am, and the other one is out-numbered. ;)

From the time the boys were very young, we taught them that if they got a toy out to play with, they needed to put it away. That habit has stuck. My oldest son is naturally exceptionally organized, so his room is always spotless. My youngest did not inherit that gene, but he still keeps his room pretty neat. By most people's standards it's probably very neat, but I have higher expectations than most. We have to walk through his room to get to the garage (it's an old farmhouse that I love, but it's a weird layout), so I walk through his room all the time, so I remind him fairly often to push a drawer in all the way, or put away a toy that was left on a chair.

I am aware that I am over the top with my expectations, but I also know that being organized and neat has helped my oldest son tremendously in school, and my youngest will also benefit from learning these organizational skills early.

Another thing, we go through closets, shelves, and toy boxes on a regular basis (about once a season) and donate anything they don't play with. That way we don't have clutter. It makes it so much easier to keep things neat, and teaches the boys to give to those in need.

I know this won't work for everyone, but it works well for us. We don't have any disagreements about cleaning up, but I think it's because we've always done things this way and it fits our personalities.

ETA: Our boys are 8 and 14.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.O.

answers from Atlanta on

my kids only use their rooms for sleeping. My kids are fairly young (I'm sure it won't be like this in the preteen and teen years), but they put their clothes in the hamper and then get dressed. I do make their beds as they get dressed in the morning. So, their rooms are always very picked up. (Dusting and vacuuming happens once every two weeks when the cleaning lady does it). I'm on the opinion that it's my house and my money that bought it, so if I want everything looking clean and presentable - that is the expectation. (Which goes against everything I thought as a child).

The playroom (which is on the terrace level) level usually gets picked up before bed every night by the kids. It didn't use to be this way and the toys strewn about all over the floor got to be such a mess that it was almost a safety hazard. And the kids would gripe and moan when we actually had them cleaned it up. Then the toy fairy got called. The toy fairy comes and takes the toys of boys and girls that don't know how to care for their stuff and put it away and gives it to the boys and girls who can. As mean as it was - one toy fairy visit and we no longer hear moaning and griping from the kids on the cleaning and they just automatically do it. The toy fairy still comes - but that's to leave them occasional new toys because they are taking such good care of their own.

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K.S.

answers from Miami on

I usually feel its her room. NO food though. And I get on her when it gets bad. But I also have a rule if you want friends to come over it has to be clean. I also made her do some ofher own laundry when I found some clean stuff on the floor.

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

it's their space for the most part, but i do have standards. from time to time, it's got to be unearthed, aired and polished!
khairete
S.

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

My only rule is that there isn't anything on the floors except furniture before leaving for school, in case I feel inspired to vaccum any given day.

I don't make my bed every day, so I don't make my son make his. Its only fair!

3..

answers from Sherman on

depends on my mood, if im in a hurry i just clean their rooms myself and that means they have to leave and let me clean, now if im in the"my kids never do anything mode" i make them clean their rooms my daughter dust each room mine included and my son who is older vacuums and they each make their own bed and then sometimes if mine isnt made i have one do it,

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J.M.

answers from Missoula on

My DD is 2 years old. I let her room be however she wants it to be during the day. Every night she gets to pick everything up off the floor and put it away. It's been working well for us so far! :)

L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Their rooms are their space BUT, I go in and pick up pretty much every day. I try to get their beds made, clothes picked up and rooms vacuumed. Why do I do it? Because they aren't home long enough to spend time picking up and really-- they don't care. They are both straight A students who volunteer, do extra curricular activities, and spend any time at home doing homework. Can I fuss about the mess? Sure, but the mess doesn't bother them, but it does bother me.
I find that if I go in and pick it up every day, it's not that big of a deal. I scoop up the clothes and put them in the wash. I make the bed. I vacuum. On laundry day I put their clothes away...
Do they know how to clean and pick up? Yes. Sometimes I don't get in to their rooms because I've been busy. If they are home and not busy with homework, they're happy to pick up for me. Okay so not overjoyed, but they'll do it. Also - if we are having company, those rooms get picked up and look great in very little time.
YMMV
LBC

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Once a week, I have Kiddo help me pick up his room pretty thoroughly. We strip the bed (great way to find toys and socks!) and make it again, then I put everything on it and vacuum the floor.

On a daily basis, I let him leave some things (constructions, mainly) out and ensure that he can get up in the night and not break his neck. We usually ask him to 'make it nice' before bedtime and he's great about self-checking. Before friends come over, yes, it's also good to tidy up, so they can find what they need, and we can put aside any toys which might not be great for the playdate. (Usually really big dinosaurs or precious items/money.)

I do it this way because A. I respect his constructions, this is his work (and he can leave one out in the living room too ---we're loose like this and he's more likely to build if I don't expect him to tear it down right away) and B. I need to keep an eye on his safety. Kiddo has daily responsibilities such as taking his clothes to the laundry and picking up his play spaces, so it's a matter of course that we don't have excess clothes or toys lying around.

and @Gamma G---your solution (of making something interesting happen) reminds me of Mrs Piggle-Wiggle and Hubert Prentis, the boy with so many toys he gets himself stuck in his room. Too bad the parade is in town...what will he do? :) Clever.

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R.P.

answers from Salt Lake City on

My children have chores and one is their rooms. They also have to clean out the dishwasher, flip the laundry(take the things from the dryer, put what is in the washer in the dryer and start a new load), put away their clean clothes (even the five year old does it because we put a bar down at her level-she picks out her clothes and gets dressed in the morning without having to call me in to get something out of her closet),set the table, put their dinner dishes in the dishwasher, etc. Each has a laundry basket in their room. They take their clothes to the laundry room twice a week and separates their own clothes. I am happiest if I can vacuum their rooms every day or every other day.

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N.W.

answers from Eugene on

I have two teenagers so I just close the door. They have to clear the floor before I vaccuum. That's not very often.

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