Child Depression

I know its quite a bit aways but starting in July Mesquite has drill team for pee wee football. My little one is on flag but yours would be on an older team. Kids make great friends here. Also try finding things she likes that other kids might do like ballet or art class or something. Kids can be so mean in excluding others. You can ever try to meet other moms and kids on here. She might make a friend close to your home from here. My daughter wasn't depressed but she had a hard time making friends when we first moved here but shes met a lot of girls from drill team and other school activities.

Hi V.,
I just read your request and I think that you should seek a counselor for your daughter. When I was 7 years old my parents divorced and I now know that I was suffering from depression. At that time divorce was not as common as it is today and there certainly was no one for me to talk to. I did not want to talk about it to with my parents or anyone else in my family for that matter. So I bottled it up inside and suffered lots of stomach aches and withdrew from my school friends. I became extremely shy and quiet. I think that if you found a good psychologist to help your daughter that she will soon be happier. I also think that if your husband suffers from depression that he too should seek help. Depression affects so many people and yet not many of them get the help that they need and deserve. I will pray that you and your family will get though this and start enjoying life again!
C.

I don't know that this depression is learned. When I was in 5th grade, I also had trouble with the kids at school. I wasn't "new", but I was outcast by my classmates because I was different, a minority growing up in a mostly white suburban neighborhood. They used to pick on me all day, and I was devistated. I remember going to the bathroom just to get away from them, I would cry all the time, and they would make fun of that too. Kids can be very cruel. My teacher had to have known what was going on, it was very apparent, yet he did nothing. I never said a word to my parents. I did have other friends outside of school. Anyway, I obviously have grown past it and have gotten over it, I'm perfectly fine now. But it did scar me. So if you feel she needs help go for it. Or maybe talk to her teacher about it, and see if there are ways she can help while in the classroom. Good luck!

V.,
You're absolutely right, she has learned 'depression' from her father and picked up his inner-explanatory style. The good thing is that it's never too late to change thinking patterns.

You should definitley read "Learned Optimism - How to Change Your Mind and Your Life" by Martin E.P. Seligman. PH.D. There's a whole chapter dedicated to showing you how to help your child escape pessimism as well as a test designed for children to take that will help determine the extent of their depression. (I think you can even find this book at the library).

Even gong to therapist (who doesn't follow the kind of therapy this doctor recommends) will probably do more harm than good. Esp. if all they want to do is dwell on all her problems.

It will take some work on both your parts, but if she learns how to be optimistic at this point in her life, she will have far fewer problems as an adult. Hopefully you can help stop the cycle of depression.

Good luck!

Depression can run in families, however she may just be having a situation episode due to the recent move. It is very important to listen to her feelings and support her. You may want to try to get her involved in some activities that she enjoys, either at school, in the community or church that way she might be able to connect better with a smaller group of children. If she still has friends in Garland, you could see if any of them might want to come over and play on the weekend. If the saddness contiunes, you may want to consider a therapist, play therapy can be very helpful at this age. You may want to see if they offer any counseling services in the school.
The most important things you can do is listen and validate your daughter's feelings "I can see you are having a hard time".