Car Seating Assignments

This is a great teachable lesson. They should work it out themselves. If they can't come to an agreement then they both sit in the back.

Very simple. Until they can come up with an agreement themselves, neither one sits in front. They really argue over this?

Two of my nieces are old enough to ride in the front, and when I have them, their younger brother and my two boys, I need one of them to ride in the front. They came to visit for a few days, and the simply took turns. Each time we went somewhere, they switched. So if we drove to the park, the oldest might have been in front, when we drove home the younger one was in front. They just kept switching. So it wasn't an all day or an all week thing. Every trip they switched. It usually works out just about right. Drive to the store. Drive home. It ends up about the same.

I think your last sentence, with some adjustments, is the start for a great solution. Tell them that you don't want to sit near people who fight, so if they start squabbling over the front seat, they will both need to sit in the back. Of course, you might need to put in earplugs for the ride that follows as they snipe at each other, however you can console yourself with knowing that it might be the last time for this issue :). When they work out an arrangement (alternating seems like the simplest one and you can suggest it, but they should decide themselves ultimately), they can implement it on the next ride. Get their agreement in writing, so no one can renege. Good luck!

Mom of 4 chiming in. The rotating daily or on each ride was exhausting to remember and would lead to a lot of arguing. To be perfectly honest I didn't care who sat in the front seat; I just wanted quiet. So we set up a weekly schedule working from the oldest down to anyone who was the correct age and weight to sit up front. You had the week and after that it was someone else's turn. No arguing and everyone knew they'd have a turn.

Your last line is exactly my advice. I have zero patience for that kind of nonsense. So long as there is space in the back, no one gets the front. Problem solved.

Be their parent and make a decision. Write it on the calendar if you want but do every other day period.

If the one moves to the front after the first one gets out then she's getting a treat. Just be the mom and make a rule then stick with it.

They'll be glad it's over.

Alternating sounds like the most fair way (and of course your older daughter felt it was stupid, because she couldn't manipulate it to get her way all the time. Not nice.)

So I would say alternate, and if they argue about whose turn it is, they both go in the back.

They take turns, like one going TO the store and one going home. Or they sit in the front if that's easiest for drop off/pick up at that moment. Or the both sit in the back if they can't behave enough to sit next to you.

ETA: And they should always give up their seat for an elder, like Grandma.

We have not had to deal with this issue yet and it seems like you have a lot of good suggestions already. My only idea is this, each child is assigned a day of the week, child A gets Monday, Wednesday & Friday. Child B gets Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. On Sunday neither sits in the front (it's a day of rest, lol) That way you always know based on what day of the week it is who is sitting in the front. Just an idea
Good Luck :0

If they fight or argue over it, they'd both be in the back. Ain't nobody got time for that!! Haha...sorry, I had to.

Honestly, it's always a fight and always will be because everyone wants to sit up front. Only one of mine can sit up front right now, but the next in line isn't too far away size wise. So now it isn't a fight at all...the boys even have their preferred sides in the back, so it works nicely. But when it doesn't work nicely anymore, I fully intend to tell them that if there is ever so much as a bicker about it, they are all in the back. I honestly have enough on my plate and will not listen to that mess on top of everything else. So they can figure it out like people grown enough to sit in the front, or they can hop in the back and zip their lips. Problem solved.

We have days of the week. My daughter was born on an even day and my son on an odd...parents get the 31st (so both would be in the backseat! :) It solves all problems, choice of lollipop color, first choice of toy, TV show, book reading, OR "Shotgun rules", which is what your eldest is gunning for!

What's wrong with just trading off? My sister and I are 18 months apart, not sure why, but we always wanted the front seat too at that age (probably to control the radio). We simply took turns when we were both in the car. If only one of us was, then she got the front (obviously), but it didn't count as far as turn taking with sis went. Thanks for the blast from the past ("It's MY TURN, GET IN THE BACK!!!!).

I used to do the 'oldest get's the front', but is that really fair, especially when they are only a year or so apart. That means the younger ones will pretty much never get to move to the head of the class.

So I have always done it....one rides in the front where we are going, and one rides it home when we are leaving. Everyone get's a turn and I pretty much figure out where the middle ground is.

As they get older the squabbling tends to wain away. It only seems to happen in the beginning years when it's still all so new and fun to them.

Do it well. Girl#1 all rides back and forth all week Monday thru Friday. Girl #2 the next week Monday thru Friday. Weekends they can take turns. The whole age thing and older privilege would work if one was 12 and one was 6 but they are too close in age for that. And if there is fighting then yep both in back all the time.

I would stay out of the debate. Let your girls figure it out. It's good practice at problem solving/ negiotiation skills. The rule is if they argue about it to the point where it's annoying to you, they both sit in the back. It's amazing what happens when the parent stays out of it. Do not listen to either daughter's "side", or the pleading and whining.

If your daughters realize that you will not take a dide, but will send them both to the back seat, if they can't figure it out, things get settled quickly.

T. Y.
SAHM of 5
13, 11, 5, 4, & 2

While taking turns would be the fair thing, the back seat is safest for kids of all ages, so if the fighting continues I would remove the headache and just make them both ride in the back.

ugh.. Yep. Been there. I currently have a 15 and a 12 year old.

They mostly solved it themselves, b/c now whomever is in the back has the entire back area to themselves. Storage spots and all. :)

But, one way to direct things is to let age be the factor. Your 14 year old will soon be looking forward to getting a learner's permit (driving) and you can make her sitting up front into a learning experience. We began doing that, talking about why we were doing the things we were doing while driving (checking the blind spot, getting into "this" lane, dimming the headlights, slowing down as we approached a green light that we knew was bout to turn yellow then red quickly, etc). AND we also started asking the front passenger for directions. So they would learn the roads. From the back, it is more difficult to learn your way around, and navigation skills are part of learning to drive.

So, make it not about being up front and being cool, but about learning things. Pretty much eliminated the issue for us.

Honestly, the way I work it is that the oldest passenger in the car gets the front seat. Age comes with privileges. So if they're both in the car, the 14 year old gets the front. When the 14 year old gets out, the 12 year old can move up. If there is whining and moaning about it, the 12 year old can stay in the back since she's not acting mature enough to merit sitting up front.

We had 6 kids fighting for the front seat when I was growing up. Lol.

My dad's first "decision maker" was whoever had been responsible about getting their chores done hat day ( or week...) if we hadn't done our chores, we didn't get the privilege of riding up front.

Also, if we had been misbehaving/being disrespectful... Backseat!

If he had to make a choice after that, then we would play Rock Paper Scissors for it. (Unless it seemed like one of us just hadn't had to opportunity to ride up front for a long time... Then he would just choose.)

I imagine with only two fighting over it, a weekly rotation may be the easiest.

I would just say one of them gets odd numbered days and the other gets even. Today is December 4, so whoever is assigned "even" gets the front seat all day. Obviously, the other can sit there if she's alone with you in the car.

They can alternate who gets the 31st on months that have 31 days. One gets it in January, May, August and December. The other gets it in March, July and October. Hopefully they can manage to get over the fact that one child will get one more day a year than the other.

I remember fighting with my sister about this all the time.

When my sisters who are twins were little, my mom instituted "choice days" for them. One day was the "choice day" for one twin, then the next day was the other's "choice day" and so on. It rotated back and forth on a daily basis. Choice Day basically meant that twin got first crack at anything and everything that occurred that day. Where to sit in the car, get in the bathroom first, choose the TV show, eat the last pop tart, whatever. It came in very handy and eliminated a lot of squabbles.

I would not put a 12-year-old and 14-year-old in the front seat.
I want them to be as safe as possible.
ONLY if I had no other seats available would I do that, and only if the 12-year-old fit the adult seatbelt and didn't need a booster (most fit at that age but short kids might not).

If they are FIGHTING over it I'd lose my mind. NOBODY gets to sit up there. It is not a cool treat to do so, just a less safe way to sit.

So yeah, I agree move them to the back. Keep your sanity, too!