So, I have 2 kids and everyone knows that it's just different with your own kids. I have turned down people in the past when asked to babysit because I just have always known that I'm not great with other people's kids. My friend who has 3 kids asked me to babysite for her 4 days a week for 6 months to a year. I thought about it and figured, it's good money and my kids would probably love the company. Well, I've only had them for 2 days now and I just feel stressed all day long. I take them outside, but I have to bring them back in because the 2 youngest, who are 1 1/2, run off in opposite directions and then I'm totally wore out. We're not allowed to have a fence where I live. I'm just wondering, is there a secret to being able to watch other kids and learn to be calm with it? Has anyone else been just like me, but then got over it and became a great babysitter to other kids?
Teehehe, I had those days too (OMG WHAT HAVE I DONE?!) when I babysat.
Then I got paid and remembered, Ah, right! THIS is why! It's either THIS, or GO to work to help financially, which for me would've been WAAAY worse!
:)
I don't think everyone's meant to but you're also talking 5 kids with 2 such young ones at that age where they're really tough. Like you said, they run in different directions etc. 5 kids all above the age of say 4 would be a way different equation...
Nope. Some people aren't even meant to stay with their own kids all day.
As a daycare professional, I LOVE seeing posts like yours. So many people get into doing home daycare (legally following their states regulations for licensing or whatever they call the status, or not), thinking its great money and if they are a parent they can surely do it, right???
Wrong. To me, I have a different standpoint as it degrades, in a way, my own profession. Like a DIY home project person touting themselves as a professional contractor. Or a nurse saying they are a surgeon. Sure, you have knowledge and some experience and training with your own kids, etc...but with a larger group? Probably not. And with the things required by your states licensing or registration stuff (it can be ALOT getting your home in line) and all the standards to maintain while you and your family actually LIVE there. It can be alot to do, in addition to actually caring for and teaching children.
Not everyone is cut out to do this and its ok to admit it! I, personally, could never be a waitress, or sit in an office all day. I am a (degree)childcare professional and have worked exclusively with children all of my adult years (25 years). Its what I do.
No way. I am not able to watch other people's kids. Sometimes play dates drive me nuts :).
I guess I expect a lot from my kids in the way of manners and when other kids come and are rude, I about go crazy.
In 2006 I went o na job interview and left in tears. I felt it went awful. I called my husband and told him I was just going to be a babysitter so I could stay home with our kids and make money. I got a job offer from that interview later that week. Best call I ever received.
Don't feel bad :).
Oh goodness, it's really not for everyone! It's definitely not for me. My son and I have a groove, a relationship, we can read each other and know what to expect from each other. Even at just three, we find our days getting so much smoother and easier as each goes by. I love that. I tried to watch some girls, they were even older. I just was not good at it. I couldn't ever get things to run as well as my home is run. (Lets be honest, I have my days. It's not always smooth and peachy here either!) The money just wasn't worth my sanity. I felt stressed, stretched, like I wasn't able to give my child enough, the other children enough. I didn't have enough time, energy, etc. I just really hated it. I never could get over it, I stopped. However, I will suggest you give yourself some more time. You might be able to create some kind of groove with the kids and it could start going really smoothly. There might be a nice routine this situation falls into. When you've gone awhile and you think to yourself, "You know, it's been a while, it really should be easier then this by now" you know it's time to move on.
I love my children, love to be around them, can tolerate their antics (for the most part) but I cannot stand to watch other people's children. People don't understand this about me because I have 4 children of my own and people always say what a great mother I am, this and that and how I'd be great with baby sitting. NOT. I watched my friend's baby when he was 2 months old until he was 13 months old. I only watched him maybe 4 hours, once or twice a week and I only had one child of my own at the time and I have to say, I feel exactly how you described. Stressed out. The baby cried, I couldn't console him no matter what I did. He wanted to be held all the time when I had my own baby to care for and hold. It was annoying so I finally had to tell my friend that I couldn't watch him anymore. I tried a few years later to watch someone else's baby only to find that I just did not enjoy it. So yes, there are others like you and no, I've never outgrown it. I have no desire to baby sit again.
To answer your question, NO, babysitting is NOT for everyone. I'm like you- I have real trouble watching other people's kids. I don't know why, but I've never been able to overcome it. When I stayed home with my kids I often thought that it would be nice to watch a few kids at home to make some extra money, but I just knew I couldn't handle it. For some reason, I can never chill & relax when someone else's child is in my care, ya know? It's gotten better now that my girls are older, I don't so much mind their friends coming over, and lots of them have gotten comfortable with our house and family, so it's not a big deal, but I still don't typically "babysit", and I never will.
I think you need to give it a week and see if you can manage or not. New routines are hard. That said, just because you have kids doesn't meant that ALL kids work for you. For example, on Sunday afternoons when my friend's son is here, we don't run errands. I don't have a carseat for him. The children interact differently. It's completely different than when it's just me and DD. Only you can decide if it will work long-term. I'd give your friend time to find a new sitter if it won't work, though.
heavens no! honor your own natural personality and inclinations. many excellent mothers are not great with other people's kids. cut yourself some slack. find another money-making venue.
khairete
S.
I could never do it. Mine? Yes. Other kids? Nope. That's why I also have so much respect for great teachers!
It is a VERY demanding job! I keep 4 kids and I love them, but yes, it's hard. I've been doing this for 4 years though so you learn over time how to make your job easier. Having a fence is a must! Lol. I'd go nuts too!
Making plans is the best way to keep the day going smoothly. Having a schedule is a must! For us, it's playtime from 8-10 (with breakfast served at 9am), then class (I teach preschool), then lunch, then cleanup, then nap from 1-3, then coloring and/or craft, then play outside and then go home.
It's NOT a job for everyone. Some days I think it's too hard, but I just keep swimming and the next day is great.
There's a reason why many childcare providers take classes on "how to" care for multiple children who are not your own... it's really hard!
I love having children around me all of the time. It doesn't bother me in the least bit to have my twin nieces (2.5) all day with my son (3.5). Add another one it... the more the merrier. My husband? Hates it. He loves his nieces and nephews, but really doesn't "enjoy" playing with children other than his own.
The "secret" is to have a highly structured and predictable environment. You don't need a permanent fence, but one of those collapsible/ configurable play yards is probably a really good idea. Have set activities planned each day mixed in with "free play" time. A good childcare provider has a plan each day and sticks to it!
If you already knew that you don't enjoy playing with and supervising other people's children, why did you agree to this? I year with 5 young children is a LONG time!!
It seems you have the mistaken idea that taking care of kids should be easy. Any time you do something new to your schedule or work load, there is an adjustment period. But I can only imagine that twice the kids is twice the work.
Omg!! Funny!! I never babysat when I was a teen, and I would never want to do it now! My own kids are fine, but I don't love kids enough to be with anyone else's!! Maybe when I am a grandmother!
Did you tell your friend you'd have a trial run to see if it worked out?
Funny I'm just the opposite, I have no problem with watching other people's children. I actually find myself more calm and patient than with my own.
My own drive me crazy all day long. Maybe I expect much more out of my own, than those I'd watch. Oh and the whining and screaming of my own are like nails on a chalk board. For some reason another child's antics don't even phase me. So I guess to answer your question it appears some are more cut out for it than others. I wouldn't hesitate to let your friend know that it just isn't going to work out if you continue to feel stressed and overwhelmed. Totally okay for sure......
It is not for everyone.
Per yourself, it does not seem to be a good match.
I used to do childcare, while my daughter was younger, and before I had my 2nd child. I did it for about 3 years.
It was fine.
Extra money for myself.
But yes, it is not easy.
And, no, I would not want to do it again.
**Adding This: Since you are babysitting, you need to make sure... whether or not your friend is claiming you/your services, for taxes per childcare.
You too, need to claim this as income, if so. But, you have only been watching her kids for 2 days.
I think it depends on the kids. I could/would only babysit kids that were close to the same age or like to do the same things as my kids. It actually made things easier because they would entertain each other.
No! Its not for everyone especially when you have your kids too. My neice is 11 months younger than my daughter and it was kind of a automatic according to my sister that I would keep her since I quit my job to be a sahm. O my goodness!! My baby was super attached to me so when my neice was a newborn ( my sis went back to work after 3 weeks) it was like I had two newborns! I was exhausted and I bathed both babies, bottles and naps and my sanity was gone! My baby didn't sleep all night so it was like 24 hr and non stop. I just couldn't handle it! Then we thought we would try again when my baby was 3 and my neice had just turned 2
Nope! My neice cried all day-literally and my baby was jealous. It was a train wreck waiting to happen! Now that my baby is 5 (a very immature 5) I know I can handle it now. I don't do it though because my sis wants me to watch her for a minimum 10 hrs a day plus Sunday half a day for 80 dollar a week. That's just crazy and im not stretching myself thin for peanuts! My best friends son is a year older than daughter and as much as I love her, that child drives me crazy!! I agree it depends on the child if its a good match. Childcare is hard work! Its constant, non stop work and when its your child, it's instinct and it has to be done. It can be taxing if its not your own!
No, it's not for everyone. Think about it, you now have five kids (are they all under school aged?) four days a week. That's a lot of kids to take care of and especially if you're really not set up for it, like no fence. Maybe it would work out better if you watched the kids at their house. It's only been two days and you're not really in a routine yet. I'd say give it a two week trial and if you're not liking it, give your friend reasonable notice so that she can find another sitter. While working from home while you're there with your own kids seems ideal, having to take care of 3 extra kids all day means you're taking care of kids all day without doing much else.
